So I finally had the talk after 5 months and we are bf gf labeled now, he says he hates labels but I told him that’s a deal breaker for me so he is labeling it for me pretty much and idk how I feel about that yet but then he goes straight into saying that he is looking for marriage and I check all the boxes, I’m just confused. He says he’s serious about me but does this mean he’s just confused? We haven’t even said I love you to each other yet, tho I do love him but scared to say it out loud

Recommendations on an exceptional career coach who can help my husband? He works with his brother at a startup his brother founded (my husband is in-house counsel) but often finds himself belittled by his brother, cut out of conference calls and emails and generally feeling like he has no skills. He's an ivy league graduate and went to a great law school but for many reasons cannot leave this job right now. Looking for someone to help w/his confidence level and ways to approach his brother. TIA!

ADVICE THREAD

Feel like sharing advice? Which info would have changed your life if you only had known back then?

Any kind of advice is accepted 😉

My wife and I are both terrible housekeepers and our clutter is overwhelming us. We have two kids under 3 and a wonderful nanny but we need more help at home. How do we throw money at this problem? Where do we start to get ongoing professional help decluttering, organizing, cleaning, etc.? What has worked for you?

Do you ever get over an ex you loved?

How do you deal with your boyfriend still being friends with someone he slept with before? Kind of bothers me but not sure if it’s normal....

I know this sounds weird, but I think my fiancé has my tech tapped… I journal and write short stories that I’ve used as an outlet for years. Way before I met him. Lately, it feels like he repeats things that I’ve written or said over the phone. For example, I’ll tell a friend that I want to visit her in San Diego. Then, he’ll come home and say I should visit my friend in San Diego soon. Am I paranoid or is he really listening? I feel violated and exposed. He doesn’t have a tech background.

If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain, if you're into yoga and you have half a brain, if you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape; Then I'm the love that you've looked for... write to me and escape

This bowl has been quiet and I see partners commenting on odd posts around fishbowl so I figure you need more fodder: partners, did any of you have parents that travelled as much as you do?

Any tips for organizing a bedroom, closet, dresser & bathroom? My teen has IADHD, and low executive functioning. Her room looks like a land mine. Clean clothes are mixed in with dirty, her desk is a disaster, she won’t let go of clothes she’s outgrown, drawers are open with clothes hanging out. A therapist said to close her door if we don’t want to see it but it’s more than that. She needs this important life skill & I don’t know how to help. Easier to organize w/o her but that’s not a solution.

My SO adds very little to our relationship. She has a dead end job. I cook. I work. I oversee finances. I plan trips. She doesn’t have a voice in the relationship. I’ve asked her to give her perspective but she always defaults to mine bc she thinks I’m smarter/worldly. She feels intimated by me and my social circle. Lately, I’ve found myself thinking for her. Anticipating her wants and needs and then adjusting my behavior to meet them. Which she appreciates but it’s frustrating 29M 27F

Tips for helping kids stay on task during zoom? Our little class (9 kids) has been doing zoom circle times twice a week but I noticed they are really distracted. Also every meeting a kid leave...

How does one find a group of friends? Meeting people individuality or as couples is too much work

My relationship just ended yesterday because he wanted to “focus on myself and figure things out.” My relationship before that ended (~2 years ago) because he wanted to focus on himself. I can’t help but feel like it’s because something is wrong with me. What am I doing wrong?

For anyone in this bowl. How crucial is it for you to have a formal dining room separated from the kitchen? My son and daughter-in-law are buying a house for their future family and I'm trying to convince them a formal dining room looks better and makes things less chaotic in the kitchen, especially with kids. Am I out of touch? Or is it still important?

Seeing local parents reacting to the public school lottery results in DC, got me super nervous about when it’s my kids turn.

I hate the idea of having so little control.

How do I start the divorce process? Do I have to get a lawyer? Help...!

AITA? If my SO of 1 year wants to get a dog, do I get an opinion? We don’t live together

I feel like gay men especially are constantly discriminated against in the workplace. I have been turned down for a promotion, yet again, in favor of a married heterosexual with kids. This has been the story of my career. Have superior experience - stellar reviews - people fighting to get on to my team because our team is great and I treat everyone well. This is so frustrating. Again and again, it’s a culture of parents helping other parents. No gays in upper level mgmt in our office.

Haven’t seen bf in over 3 months due to COVID. Lately, he’s been pushing to see me but I don’t feel comfortable because he hasn’t been quarantining. He makes it sound like if I’m not willing to go see him might as well breakup. Any advice?

How do you convince your SO to accompany you to Varsity to tick it off your ATL bucket list??

Best CBD brands for sleep... ready set GO!

Hope you all enjoy the long weekend! More importantly, please don’t work.

I know there have been lots of posts on Herman Miller Aeron, etc. but any recommendations for an office chair that will be comfortable for long work days but not be an eyesore in the middle of my apartment? Standard office desk chair will feel out of place with surrounding decor, but more design-oriented options are basically dining chairs that will kill my back with 12-14 hour days. Help!

YOE : 7.8 i have an offer from IBM and HCL.
IBM : 18 fixed + 1 JB HCL : 21 ( 18 fixed + 1lakh approx (monthly variable) + 2 lakh Annual variable ) . Now i have a discussion pending with Robert Bosch , What should i quote ! Which will be better for job security and work life and overall career growth .

Hi
I am working in Amazon from June 2020 as L3 HR Generalist. My current CTC is 5.2 LPA. I have a post graduation degree in English.
I was wondering if doing an MBA distance course from Symbiosis would help me get a better position and salary?
Can anyone please suggest? If not symbiosis then can I choose any other University for doing the MBA?

To those starting the year on the beach: office or home office ...or actual beach?

Hey 🐟 fam. I’m starting a new gig next week that’s 90% WFH. I’d love some recommendations on a second monitor. Nothing crazy pricy, but something that’ll work well with my MacBook Pro. Thanks y’all.

Any recommendations on books to get up to speed on leading/managing teams as a new manager in consulting? Preference towards tangible case studies etc. vs. high level concepts.

I attended interview in hexaware on sep 24th and cleared all rounds I got a mail from HR to send documents on 29th sep after that no mail no calls.. it has been month.. usually how long hexaware take to release offer

How can I earn more money as a Oracle Fusion Technical Consultant? Do you guys know way to freelance or something?
Help would be appreciated.

Hi fishes,
Need your thoughts.
I am done with my client interview and it went well but they are asking me to come to gugaon location.
I am from Bangalore location.
I directly said to client that I can't since I have my family here.
When I inform this to my manager he is saying how come u say like this to client.according to kpmg policy u need to travel to anywhere to work.
This is not good right. What should be my reply to the client in such a case and how to handle manager on this?

Received my first prenatal massage at 19 weeks today and the therapist was trained and did a bit of myofascial stretching techniques. Never touched my stomach. Just lower back, arms, legs and feet. I have had cramps in my abdominal area since a few hours after the massage. Not sure if it’s cramps or stretching pains. Drinking a ton of water to flush out toxins, but is this pain normal?

Trying to set family expectations and would love thoughts on 2 things. 1. How long after baby will I be ready for visitors beyond our parents? I’m thinking a few weeks. 2. Our 3 grandmothers are 1-3 hour flights away (3 diff places) and cannot travel. When will we be ready to take baby to see them? I’m thinking 4-6 months but that would also be flu/RSV season. Can’t predict the future but family is already talking about trips and I want to set expectations and do what is best for baby. TIA!!

I am scheduled to fly from NYC to Mumbai via Paris next Wednesday (Jan 5) for a ~10 day trip. Have any of you, your family, friends, etc. flown a similar route (I.e. from US to India via Europe) in the past week? If so, what is the arrival process (Covid test, quarantine requirements, etc.)? I’ve had all recommended vaccine shots and I’m only in Paris for a 2 hour layover (not leaving the airport). Any information on this would be greatly appreciated!

Joining McKinsey, can anyone share their health/ gym benefits? Do they reimburse for a membership?

Koi batayega ye sensex ko kya ho rha hai? Paisa dalne k liye wait kar rha tha socha aur neeche jayega..aur upar ja rha hai.

Found an apartment by W 39th street and 8th ave - any know if this area is safe?

So my partner and I been dating for 5 months. But he's a man of literally very few words. What can I do to connect with him on deeper level, or any suggestions of questions I should ask him? To get know him better or to open up

I was married for 3 years & she left 1 day bc she realized that she was no longer “happy”. A week later, I caught her in a parking lot w/ her coworker & finalized the divorce. In my mind she was perfect in every way except for the infidelity. After 8 months of therapy and on and off dating, I got into a new relationship but I became commitment phobic & see flaws when I compare my ex to my new gf. 1yr has passed now and I still feel like I’m settling and not mad in love. Wwyd? 2y since divorce.

Just ordered a pizza. Another thrilling night in with the bf. What's everyone else up to?

Alright so I have been with my partner for several years and recently she said that she wants to get married. Im Happy with what we have now and don't feel the need to get married. Why do people get married? People all around us are getting married and engaged and I feel like that is weighing on her but when we drown all that out and it's just us we are happy!

I am so tired of my sister and mom, and the pressure they apply on me to get married, 32 year old female and I have not met someone yet. I was in a relationship last year for a year and he turned out to be a very mean person and they now don’t trust me at all and want me to marry the first nice guy I go on a date with even if I have no attraction at all, and if I go on a couple of dates and I don’t feel it, they question my judgement. I feel like dying from the pressure.

It’s my birthday in a few minutes. 2021 has been a terrible year for me. My marriage ended. It wasn’t a bad end though. We are still close, just not romantic partners anymore. The very first dog I ever had died and I couldn’t go see her because of the quarantine. I didn’t get a promotion that I more than deserved. I don’t think I get paid well. Most of my friends moved out of the city and I’m having to meet new people at 32. I love my job but it’s incredibly stressful. I’m terribly lonely.

How do you know if you have good hygiene? my ex told me I don’t

This is my routine:
- I have curly hair, can only wash it once a week/put dry shampoo if needed
- I brush my teeth 2 times a day
- Wear deodorant / perfume every day (my way, and good girl) and shave off any hair (I did laser but still), as much as possible. Some days, I cannot keep up with shaving (especially if it won’t show)
- I wear pantyliners and change it once a day/ change panties once a day
- I shower my body every day

I want to spend $10k on a cruise to Antarctica. My wife doesn’t want to go and doesn’t think I should spend the money either. I make 200k and she makes 65k. I worked hard to get a 37k hot skill bonus from all the certs I studied for. We are recently married. I’m discouraged because I feel like I can’t save and spend my money the way I did before. I know marriage is supposed to be united financially, but since we are recently married it’s tough to give up my freedom financially. Advice?

Anyone be in a relationship where the other has an alcohol problem? Every night out drinking leads to emotional breakdowns and fights. Been going on for 6 months now. Should I break up?

Made an appointment with my therapist to talk through the issues in my relationship. Coronavirus has been rough on us

I have been in the US from Canada on contract for the past 6 months. My fiancé and I were supposed to get married and move here permanently in the fall. She has now called off the wedding, and has told me she doesn’t want me to move to the states. I got a great offer. Great job. Don’t want to lose the love of my life but I feel played. I worked so hard for this. She’s ripping out my heart, and taking my livelihood away. Am I wrong to not abide by her choice? Ask for the ring back?

One of ex’s friends who is I met twice, has been in touch, him and his wife, like commenting on some of my posts occasionally (we are just fb friends and IG friends). I never saw them since. Then the friend texts asking if I am seeing someone and that he wants to set me up with someone. He felt awkward doing that, I thanked him for thinking of me, but then he said we all told your ex he is an idiot for letting you go and they asked my ex it they could still be touch with me and he said yes.

My girlfriend of 4 years routinely gets so angry at me in the form of “triggers.” She has childhood trauma from her terrible parents. I’ve gone to therapy with her to learn techniques to help, but when I do them during one of her triggers she says I didn’t do them. Later I’ll learn that she’s literally does not remember things I say and do when she’s in a dissociated state. Tonight it was because I didn’t get her oil changed like I said I would. Now she’s threatening to break up because idk how

Ladies of fishbowl, question. Girl says she wants to get drinks as friends, but is persistent in getting your number to text. Overthinking or is there something behind this? I’m also good friends with her current landlord/roommate.