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Trying to settle a dispute. Thank you notes (handwritten or email) after interviewing for a high level role like Account Director. Frowned upon because it looks like groveling or an etiquette MUST?

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What? Who told you a thank you note of any kind looks like groveling? That person is not someone you should surround yourself with....

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Email thank you note is a must.

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Good manners and professionalism never hurt.

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If you think a handwritten thank you note is crossing a boundary then you are the one with boundary problems. It’s an expression of gratitude. As long as the content isn’t weird (“I can’t wait to work with you and wear your skin!”), take it in the spirit in which it was intended!

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Is EL1 the person you’re having the dispute with?

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Email thank you notes are indeed a must, and usually you need to send within 24 hours of the interview. I've heard split opinions on hand-written notes. Personally I don't like getting them - it feels a little too personal/too invested for that point in the relationship (when we're still evaluating each other) and that kind of puts me off a little bit. It's also more open to misinterpretation - are you sending a written note because you're really thoughtful, or because you don't understand appropriate boundaries, or how email works? I don't know, but generally it's not great for your candidacy if I even have to wonder. Email is just a safer medium. I think once you receive an offer, handwritten notes make way more sense. At that point the level of investment matches the deliverable, so to speak. But for just following up on interviews, imo stick to email.

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Experience Lead 1 might be overthinking the experience of receiving a hand written thank you note...

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Always. Send nudes

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Don't handwrite. The decision is made before it arrives. And who here even gets mail at work? I have to pick it up on another floor. That's work and effort, and often takes me a week to remember to do so.

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How do people even send handwritten notes? You just address it to the company (and floor?) and giant building that person sits in?

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Nothing says “thank you” more than a bouquet from edible arrangements.

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A thank you note is the proper etiquette in the U.S. and it has nothing to do with title level. However, it'd better be thoughtful and meaningful/relevant to your candidacy and the interview or you're wasting your time.

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That’s just good professional etiquette

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I prefer email. Handwritten note feels like you’re trying too hard.

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I don't think it matters. Nobody reasonable will think it's groveling or weird, but I can't think of a time that I noticed it when I didn't get one, nor can I conceive of a scenario where receiving one or not would affect my decision.

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^ because your premise rests on a focus group of one?

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All these old people who still use paper mail and are laughing at my post fail to realize that hiring managers like them aren't the risk factor, hiring managers like me are. It's the Pascal's Wager of notewriting - if they dislike getting hand-written notes, you don't lose by writing an email. If they like getting hand-written notes, you STILL don't lose by sending an email - your outcome is net neutral. That's the point I was making - emails are just safer. Nobody minds emails. Some people mind hand-written notes. Why EVER take the some-risk option over the no-risk option when the outcome is essentially the same either way?

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What is the underlying assumption? Candidate B sent me a handwritten note on some expensive stationery; candidate A sent a quick, polite email? Does it really matter?

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Believe it or not, I talk to other people about stuff occasionally.

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