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Hello fishes plz unlock my dm
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Where do you listen to music?
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I’ve never been more inspired in my life.
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Does this just sound wrong to anyone else?
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Online dating apps are a mess 🤢
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Some people can act like “customers”, i.e., other people exist to fulfill my needs and desires. Your wife sounds a bit like that from your post, but it’s mostly speculation given I don’t know much about the story (plus you can’t really come to good conclusions without hearing both sides).
In any case, I can see why you’d be ticked off. Not fun to pay for most (all?) of the vacation and just receive criticism in return
Well, who did the cooking? The grocery shopping? The cleaning of the house? The laundry? Airbnb is not a vacation if she’s doing all the work. And don’t tell us you did it all. If that was true, you would not have been happy either
Salesforce 1- it’s a lot more of a parenting (of young children) reality than it is a marriage issue.
Visual Storyteller
So there's this cool thing called conversations that allow you to mutually plan trips and get buy-in from everyone necessary before a trip.
Maybe that's the lesson?
And fwiw, we did this in Toronto this year and had a baller place with in ground pool and w everything. But we picked together and as a group and didn't want to even leave.
Pro
Mom here, Airbnb is shall I say a different flavor of vacation. Often a good choice when traveling with kids, but it’s just doing 70% of your home chores while in a new location.
That said, she could have said so. Unless this was your first time and she didn’t know what she was in for (though it’s predictable).
Also what’s with this going on about how “you” paid? Do you have fully separate finances or something? And what’s with this how you decided you don’t want to stay in a hotel? Did you ask her what she wanted or consider what she might want to do? Or does it not matter because “you” paid?
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all true
Rising Star
Your wife’s criticism is fair. You say you don’t want to stay in hotels, but that doesn’t invalidate her preference for the opposite. You got your way on this and she didn’t, so she’s unhappy—totally understandable. Next time you need to find a compromise, like a bed and breakfast or a hotel you can both enjoy.
Who paid is irrelevant. Resources in a marriage are shared.
Yes, tots understand what you are saying. It feels like your efforts weren’t appreciated.
I am with your wife on the Airbnb. I don’t do Airbnbs unless there's a chef and house cleaning daily. I rather stay at a hotel as well. Maybe she didn’t mean it in the way you think she did? Perhaps she meant next time let’s not do an Airbnb.
Pro
I'm a wife. TBH, I would say this kind of thing to my husband. BUT, it's so important in terms of how to say it. If the tone is like blaming the husband, then nah, you have every right to be angry. If the tone is like being very grateful and trying to openly share how I felt about the trip and how I can help in the future, I feel that's called a conversation.
So your mindset is that since you paid for everything, everyone should just shut up and pretend to enjoy what you enjoy? Is the goal of the family vacation for everyone to enjoy their vacation or is the goal for you to enjoy your vacation while buying everyone’s company?
You could’ve stayed at a number of Four Seasons for one week / 6k and she would’ve thought you were the coolest guy on the planet. Instead, you’re posting a paragraph of nonsense on an anonymous social media app. So who is wrong here?
He doesn’t need to pay for a bunch of rooms. He could get a comfortable room that accommodates his wife / two young children at a number of Four Seasons and they could all enjoy the property. It’s not his responsibility to pay for rooms for his extended family. If his wife is criticizing where they stayed, I can guarantee she did not enjoy the extra company. Sometimes you have to make decisions that are best for your marriage… like taking your wife and kids to the Four Seasons and forgetting about Uncle Jimmy and Cousin Tommy.
Chief
I don’t think you’re wrong to be a little offended but what I do think is weird is that you’re telling this story and mentioning several times how you paid. That’s your family, don’t see how you paying is relevant. You mentioning it kinda seems like you pay for things and try to be a bit controlling without getting input about what your wife wants to do.
Chief
Yea I agree with that point but I thought the post said it was his wife that was complaining
Chief
No🧐
Enthusiast
Divorce…
Rising Star
Was about time someone said this.
Also, it is not a family vacation with a two and three-year-old, that is a trip, it won’t become a vacation for a few more years
You have some very real communication issues. I mean this with great sincerity because it saved my marriage (of 41 years). Please go to couples counseling together. It will prevent a LOT of problems in the future.