Any dating advice? How should a 40-something approach dating after a divorce?

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Dont. Just stay single. Life is much easier. Newly married here 😂

likefunnyhelpful

Hey man, check out the Partner bowl. There are a few posts there on a subject.

I got divorced in my late 30s. I’d say first of all take some time off and just enjoy life, spend time figuring out yourself before looking for another relationship. After that, think about what kind of person you want to be with. For me, I didn’t know where to start to be honest but came to realization that a lot of qualities I thought I wanted in my marriage, I really didn’t want.

After that, try one of the apps - I did bumble and the league but they are all honestly all the same people for the most part. Create a good profile with good photos, go on a few dates and just enjoy it and keep an open mind. Things can be a bit lonely, but don’t use that to jump into something - let things develop naturally; don’t force it.

Not sure if you have kids; if you do, definitely don’t rush into things and wait until you’re very serious before introducing them.

Just to share my experience, I took about 2 years off from dating after the divorce just to get it together (actually tried dating straight away but decided I wasn’t ready). Then dated casually and quite infrequently for about 3 years . Then found an incredible person that I’m happy with - we’ve been together for about 2 years. Overall, I am very happy where I am and wouldn’t change this for anything even though there were some shit times. Hang in there.

likehelpfulsmart
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If I have to post on here I am probably a dude.

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If you are male, don’t. Find your peace and hobbies. Dating for men in the age of social media is not worth it for men in the US for a variety of reasons I won’t go into here. If you chose to find someone your boundaries must include no social media. Good Luck … Stay Single

likefunny

Not reading all that nonsense. Get back out there and have fun.

No need to date. Just get membership at seeking or adultfriendfinder and bang your nights away

likefunny

Get a grip Partner2. You don't know what you missing

Just know your value in the market.

I divorced at 37, have 50/50 custody of two kids, great job, retirement in sight, nice car, dress well, big dude, but healthy …I absolutely crushed it on all the dating apps, and organically IRL. Every single woman I dated was absolutely sick of dating aimless losers. Mostly I represented stability, and I’m fun, funny, love good food, drink, and I’m GGG. I was out to have a good time with good people, while open to a committed relationship if it made sense. I was “spinning plates” for a few years until I found a lady I wanted to introduce to my kids. We’ve been together for almost 10yrs, best relationship of my life and no end in sight.

I credit a lot to my failed marriage for what NOT to do.

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👆

You just escaped! Why would you want to go through the torture again?! Enjoy life (assuming she hasn't taken 1/2 your stuff 😀 )

likefunny

Considering the divorce rate within the partner community, I’m surprised there’s no internal programs covering this.

likefunny

Internal programs don't make any sense. The structure within MBBs and Big 4 is such that the expectations for marriage and kids just don't exist. You are supposed to work your ass off and bring more money for the firm all the time. Personal life, time off from slavery are good buzz words to talk about. But that's where it stops.

Successful marriages are a rarity. It has gotten to a point where if you haven't been through at least one divorce, people think something is wrong with you.

funny

Take care of yourself first and foremost - exercise, diet, hobbies - stay active. Keep doing well at your job. The rest will work itself out. There were plenty of options when I was divorced and single with no kids.

Once I decided to date seriously, Bumble worked really well, only took 2 months, and that’s where I met current wife.

likeuplifting

How many wives before? This the last one?

The dating game is not what it used to be, and finding someone who is genuine is not easy… but it’s possible.

I’d say, go in there with a clear understanding of what you want and a crystal clear view of the long term goal. I put together a 3 x 3 x 3 matrix of things that I need - not what I want ( there’s a difference ).

3 Dealbreakers ( things you won’t compromise on )
3 Personality traits you need
3 Physical traits you need

I’ve applied it in my life right now, and really helps sift through the mess.

Hope that helps!

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Depends. Are you a dude, or dudette?

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