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Chief
Tell them you have bigger things to do in life than be someone's wife .
I have a cousin sister who married at 34 , started looking at 32 ..her salary had got so high so that it took some time
Lucky my parents are understanding and let me do what I want (28 m) . Arrange marriage were business deals back then and is even now ... Better find love at 40s than compromise at late 20s ... You could mentally be alone in either case
This is such an incredibly intelligent response. Totally made my day 😊
Life happens to everyone. You cannot control everything as life is so uncertain. Your parents aren't pressuring just because it's age. There are way too many factors like 1). Biology, as you age more, escpecially after 30's, it becomes difficult to conceive and have a healthy child as quality of eggs reduces significantly.
2). Life is uncertain. Parents know that if they dont get you married while they are alive, it will become difficult later as society only loves to make a mockery. Everyone will have vested interests in getting you married then.
3). Marriage, just like earning money, is a responsibility (if you are considering getting married anytime). We shoudln't run away from our responsibilities. Handle it. Career and marriage can both go hand-in-hand. You shouldn't trade one for other. There will be challenges and transitions in career lifelong, but that shouldn't be the reason to not do other things.
So, if you are ever considering getting married, now is the time. You have to learn to manage both career and other responsibilities together.
This is another thing tha your parents have considered in their mind. It is something worth considering. Better plan ahead than regretting later, and nothing is above family.
The thing is when you will be in 30s it will be difficult to find a match of your age or around 32.
As boys with 32 YO prefer 25-29 age person.
So matches will be quite in few numbers unless you opt for love marriage or you know someone very well.
It gets difficult to find a match when you are 31-32 even for boys and you need to compromise if you are going for arranged marriage. Career is also important but you need to choose from the standpoint when you would be 32-33 what would be more difficult to achieve at that point of time - another onsite opportunity or a perfect life partner🙂
PS: keep a 'buffer' of 1year as it usually takes this much time to find a match ;)
In an age where people marry someone just to get a visa or green card or onsite whatever, you are being true to yourself and weighing your options . That's it , nothing wrong . Everybody around us would have views on what exactly is an ideal life . The truth is , there is no right answer to that . Take the opportunity , go to a different country and experience a different culture. Explore the world of opportunities it has to offer . And once you are really ready , get married . Don't fall into the Indian age trap for getting married . You can marry at 25 and be divorced by 26 .. yo can marry at 35 and be in love for life... stop controlling things which aren't in your hands .. there is no right age even if the society tells you so
Exactly ! 🙌🏻 and I don’t see many happy people who followed the society accepted path 😂 two of my friends are on the verge of a divorce at age 30&31 (not that age matters ) but they are open to new experiences in life . All so called preachers don’t even know what is happening in their own married lives .
Arrange marriage is a joke according to me
Arrange marriage in India is more like gambling, sometimes it makes you really lucky, sometimes it's shit in the purest form.
Anyway, all the best for everything.
Live your life the way YOU want and not blindly follow what parents/society think.
30, 40 or 50 - marry only when you want to and not because there is a marriageable age per society. If career is priority now, focus on that.
Cool thanks
I would suggest to take your parents suggestion seriously if you want to go for an arranged marriage. Because in case of arranged marriage making a pair is extremely difficult these days due to expectations on both the sides and kundali nd all things. After all of these you guys need to understand each other then you will decide to go ahead.
If you start looking after 30 then you need to compromise on multiple things. Also after marriage people will again compel you to plan for a baby. After 30 planing baby is difficult. So you can imagin you will get less time after marriage to travel pr explore together.
I would suggest at least start for looking. You can take to get married once you choose a boy
Chief
Mein ruk jaaunga tum jaakr aao tbtk 😂😂😂 jokes apart focus on your career first , bandon ki kami nahi hai India mein mil jaayenge.
Chief
Yes
Being a girl, will suggest you a practical approach.
The only way to say no is to say 'No'. Nobody going to help you. Its only you who can convince them or request them to wait for a year atleast. I am also 28, my parents also ask me to marry but i have simply told them just give me 1 more year so that I can make a better plan for my future, i will move to Mumbai basis my next new job and will come back after a year and then we can plan. I know somewhere it will definitely not going to be next year. Its not easy to come back once you make a move or change cities. So i am happy;) In your case tell them you can marry next year but let me go first (to the country you are moving) and start my job and will come back next year for marriage. You will definitely take minimum 2 years to come back. Nobody is going to come there too.
In case you are moving to canada/ Australia. Call your parents for 6-7 months, make them explore new country. Aise karke 1-2 saal to nikal jayege. Enjoy there and build your things accordingly. 30-31 me kralena shaadi. No worries.
If you take this all easy, it will be all easy for you to go with the flow. Mental pressure jitna loge utna badhega. Distract yourself with visa processing activities/ finding future accommodations, job search, shopping before moving there, take good care of your health- you should be healthy before moving to a new environment/ weather, meet Friends as much as u can because you will not going meet them once you leave India!
Hope that helps. Take care:)
Take visa and go to other country . Find a partner there .
Win -Win for all .
Lol right
Try exploring both , if anyone having same interest as yours and matches your expectations .
Else in late 30's it might be possible you have to compromise on many factors.
Sure thanks
I agree this whole Arrange Marriage thing is really weird if you think about it logically
If you have a bf/gf and you're not married then sleeping together is a huge taboo even though you both love each other and want to
But on the other hand if you've crossed a certain age and you don't have someone special then society says "this guy/girl is amazing. Since you've reached the age of 30, we want you to marry him/her and then start sleeping together and making babies. Love may or may not happen with this person in the future. But since you've reached a certain age, now you have to"
True 👍
Priorities matter.. whichever is your preference priority at the moment, follow it
No won't work in India
Rising Star
Same stage as mine, Don't worry just ignore
Don’t say No
But now find matches where the guy is settled at the place you are moving to
Dont make a career your only life goal .....no one is going to remember your career achievement (especially when your are an employee ) it is rat race ...live life for family and friends & Contribute towards society
Please avoid marriage in this case as of now. Explore the world 🌎!! If you are getting chances.
Do u have bf ? If yes go ahead.
DE1- You're not getting matches not because of age but something else. You need to figure out what that is.
Thanks a lot
Rising Star
Btw which country's visa are you getting?
Rising Star
Congrats! Is it internal transfer through Infosys?