I’ve been onboarding at a new company for a month. I’ve been assigned to PM something a director in another department originally proposed, but I am really struggling to work out how to deal with her territorialism and defensiveness. She is insisting on being in on every conversation I have with a stakeholder, gets angry if I answer a question asked directly of me, and shoots down literally everything I’ve suggested. Her team will do most of the implementation. Any ideas on how to “manage up”?

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Maybe you can talk with her and try to create a better game plan before going into the meeting. Let the manager know that you are here to help and not compete for her job.

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Sounds like this is her baby, and she doesn’t want to let it go! Maybe pull out a decision rights matrix if needed. It’s a tough place to be in, on one hand you don’t want her to think she can walk all over you, but on the other you don’t want to create an enemy.

Maybe have a heart to heart and let her know that she’s making things difficult for you to move forward. Maybe she doesn’t realize it?

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Ooh, I like the idea of a decision rights matrix!

I think you are right on that it’s her baby and it’s hard to let go.

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