Nine months on the job, 2019 graduate, feeling very ill-equip and self-conscious about making mistakes. My review went well, just had one partner who is generally difficult to get a hold of and who doesn’t actually respond say I need to ask more questions. How do I get out of this rut of feeling useless and like I’m not contributing to my job?

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I agree, this is a very common feeling. You have a lot of learning to do. I’m a third year and honestly just recently starting to feel more helpful than not. The first two years were a lot of learning—not just how to do the job, but how to manage people you’re working with. Lots of different personalities, done easier to work with than others. The legal industry also has a lot of smart people and it’s easy to feel inferior and useless, but you’re not! You’re right there with the rest of them and everyone had to take those first steps and probably (even if secretly) felt a little useless at first. Hang in there!

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Thank you! This was helpful.

This is a pretty common feeling amongst the associate ranks. Especially right out of law school there is a steep learning curve so it feels like you are learning something new and making mistakes while doing so every day. Tbh that never ends you just get more comfortable with the feeling.

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Just takes time. As a first year, you are effectively useless. That will gradually change and in a year or two you will be useful. Just do the best you can to soak up as much knowledge as possible and to hone your craft. The partners aren't expecting you to be Clarence Darrow right off the bat.

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Agree with all of the above.

Also remember that this is a VERY weird time for everyone because of the pandemic and related disruptions of personal and professional lives, relationships, and habits. Almost no one feels as useful right now as they ordinarily do, with the possible exception of lobbyists and restructuring specialists. That goes for partners too. Take a deep breath, remember to focus on the long game, and soak up every lesson you can. You got this.

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Definitely par for the course to feel like a useless idiot the first few years of practice. I felt like a cat under people’s feet that they kept tripping on. It was hell. Generally speaking most of us are used to feeling bright, talented, or capable. It’s a really big shock to suddenly feel day in and day out like a nuisance or not helpful. Just keep putting in the time to learn - THAT is your job right now.

Anybody who thinks they skipped this phase probably didn’t actually skip it at all - they are just so out of touch with what’s going on around them that they can’t be relied upon anyway, OR they had someone managing them who never gave them real responsibility to begin with, so the stakes just weren’t there.

I know it’s sucks but try to keep your head up. Bonus points if you find a way to have a sense of humor about it. Hang in there ❤️

likeuplifting

This was all super comforting, honest, helpful, and just what I needed. Thank you all so much and have a great weekend!

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2019 grad here. I know this feeling well. What I do is ensure I'm doing the simple things flawlessly and mentally congratulate myself on jobs well done. It's silly, but it tilts my self-talk toward the positive and boosts my overall confidence.

I also made a list if the qualities I want to be known for. I laminated it and keep it on my desk to refer to. I call it my "brand". I figured this is when my reputation is developed. I check it daily. It's corny, but it works. It's silly stuff, like "rarely swears", "patient", "punctual", "deliberate". But as the months go by, while I work on developing my technical skills, I'm deliberately building a reputation that will make me profitable, easy to work with, reliable and a draw for my firm or other future employers and clients.

smart

Commercial lit practice area for context.

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