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Take your full allotment of paternity leave
Let the mom focus on rest when you're home
Change diapers
Do the laundry
Hire a maid (at least once or twice in the first month you're traveling again)
Snuggle that baby
See that you help your wife get the sleep she so desperately needs
Don't ask for sex before the doctor green lights it
Keep the baby bottles clean
...
That's a simple little list, but should get you started :)
It may be harder on your wife because of the part about giving birth and breast feeding / pumping, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for you. Make sure you have someone to talk to about how tired you are and how nobody recognizes that you’re also going through a lot. Somebody who won’t judge you as a horrible, self-centered, inconsiderate-of-your-wife person.
Hint: this person is probably not your wife.
Two more:
- Skin on skin snuggles will serve as an emotional freakout reset for infants (remove all but the diaper, take off your shirt, and snuggle the baby). Really works!
- Start a bedtime routine. My wife and I sing the same song every night. Just hearing the song she starts rubbing her eyes now :)
Costco and Target wipes work just as well as the expensive name brand ones. And you do not need aloe and cucumber oils on them. The baby does not care as long as they are clean.
Same goes with diapers. Luvs work as well as huggies and are cheaper.
There's nothing better than falling asleep with your child while you are in a chair or laying on a sofa.
I don’t mean let go of everything. I mean that suddenly this new person has control. If you don’t let go, if you think you can maintain the same control over your life and your things, you’re crazy
Don’t be afraid to leave the house with the baby. Go out to lunch. Your baby’s crying is never as loud as you think it is to others. And laugh it off when it doesn’t go as planned
Help wifey in every way you can. Whatever struggles you may be experiencing pale in comparison to hers. Be proactive about taking time off her hands with the kid. Means a lot to both of them.
Buy a Costco membership
Relax and let go. Nothing will ever be the same. You can’t control your kids behavior. They do what they want.
I struggle with letting go every day.. my personality struggles with it. But... it’s important. Furniture can be replaced. You’ll find hobbies that work with being a parents. It’s okay for the house to be a mess sometimes.
Let go.
Travel with the baby in the first 6 months is easier than it will ever be. Don’t be afraid to fly
I disagree with H1. Don't let go. you have a huge responsibility and the person your child will become is largely shaped by your behavior.
You just rolled onto the longest and best engagement you'll ever get.
time to bring your A game
One life saver that worked incredibly well for me. Eventually transitioned to an Echo Dot for nature sounds and/or white noise
When you start travelling, get a ip cam for home for your baby's room and connect so you can watch from the road. You will miss them when you hit the road, and the camera is super useful.
DD1- spot on. I have been humming the same lullaby to my kid since she’s been born. Helps her go to sleep even now at eight.
You’re wife may forget about you or not want to be touched. And that’s okay. That’s normal. She will get her passed it.
Thank you all 👍🏻
Learn the "happiest baby on the block" methods. make you a baby whisperer overnight
Don't worry about white noise or anything like that to get the baby asleep. By the third one, I realized my house is never going to be quiet again during the day. Now my 3rd and 4th ones can sleep through anything now that they are older.
Feed them
Start couple’s counseling. At least once a month at the beginning. Communication is imperative for sanity