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I’m too taking a break from dating! Except I don’t have a particular reason... I just lost interest lol. Got back on a dating app a while ago and couldn’t last 2min of browsing. Also the thought of introducing myself over and over again and all that small talks gives headache. I rather read my books or watch Netflix.
Good reflection tho OP! I totally agree with you!
Chief
For real, small talk is literally the worst. And having to deal with people who are really boring or say super gross things, it’s all just exhausting. Definitely enjoying my Netflix time instead!
I got caught up in that dating cycle at one point. In retrospect it was horrible, I dated a lot of guys who looked good on paper but yikes! So I stopped, turned dates down, spent reflecting for awhile, and just stopped looking. Did things that made me happy. A year later I walked into my office and met the man I married. He didn’t check any of my “boxes” (well -except kind and funny) but yet is the perfect guy for me. If I’d stayed on the earlier path it would have never happened. Good luck!
Neat
Me too! Broke up during the pandemic and have been all by myself. I’m not gonna lie- it was painful and i am still feeling insecurity sometimes, but I really feel im on a right path to open up a new chapter of my personal life. I’m learning self-love, put myself first and look after my surroundings who’s been always giving loves. Glad to hear that im not alone.
Enthusiast
I have been at this point before. After dating different guys who say they want something serious but having the relationship go now where, I just got tired of it all. I felt I would rather be single than date people who just want to fill a void. I was single for about a year, and reflected a lot on what I wanted and my past relationships. I put a lot of blame on the guys I’ve dated and made it their fault for the relationship not working out. However I realized it was my fault too. I was also insecure and didn’t have the guts to end things when I needed to bc I wanted to be in a relationship. I eventually did get excited to date again, and now I’m in a serious relationship for 2 years :) hope you figure out what your goals are! And enjoy being single.
Enthusiast
Corona forced me to take a break too and now the rampant thirst and desperation of all the other quarantine incels is just too repulsive to me lol
While you’re single / taking a break from dating is a great time to read Attached by Amir Levine. The science is so fascinating (it’s about attachment theory) and will completely change the way you think about dating and relationships. I read it while I was single and NOT dating, and as soon as I dove back into dating I landed in an incredible relationship which I truly attribute to this book.
Also, dating is exhausting. Breaks to focus on yourself are necessary! Go for it!
When I was looking for relationships I had a hard time. When I stopped looking and caring I found my wife. I guess sometimes our own expectations are our own worse enemies. Expect nothing, and enjoy life!
Careful fam, I did that dating break and it’s lasted 6 years. Pretty sure I’ll never do a serious relationship again, I’m very used to my life belonging entirely to me and I struggle to understand why people would sacrifice even a small portion of their own happiness to be with someone else.
Chief
I’m definitely not going to take a break forever. I love sex way too much for that, and relationship sex (consistency and quality of sex/connection) is way more fulfilling than casual sex for me 😂
There’s a difference between wanting to date, being with someone etc vs obsessing over it. Go on dates, don’t be super serious. You might be hurt if you don’t get who you want. But who knows, someone might find you and cherish you.
Pro
In the exact same boat. Good on you OP!!
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In college a couple friends and I would periodically go “warrior monk” for 2-6 weeks where all we would do is study, workout, climb, and fight.
It was really valuable time, had some great intellectual breakthroughs and personal growth.
Chief
You’re so right
Chief
Are you a female?
Always wanting perfect things.
Counsel 1 - I read it as the latter as well. That’s why I was baffled by the above male/female nonsense. I think it’s a nice thing to do for yourself to take a break form dating and just focus on self development. Doesn’t matter what gender you are
Female?
Chief
Op is female. Roger that.
I always think live is an enhancement, which is supposed to make your life better, but not a necessity. One gotta live one's self first. And I always tell people I date that
This was a mini sermon 😫
With you on this one 100%!
So introspective!
Visual Storyteller
We use distractions in order to not really think about ourselves. Like drinking to forget about problems :)