My heart really goes out to the fish in in here who is struggling with her daughter. I also have some issues feeling like my kids feel like I'm there enough. Specifically I want to know how many after school/activities you make an effort to attend? Do you go to all your child's soccer games, recitals, etc?

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I got some great advice once from a C-Suite leader with three small kids at home. Pick the moments that matter and show up 100% to those. Then set a good example as an ethical leader, your kids will benefit from getting some of your undivided attention but also see you as a high achieving role model.

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Love this point of view!

It is beyond difficult to make it to all the events my kids have. It seems like lately there are more middle of the day activities, that I feel most parents find extremely difficult to attend. I never want to miss my kids anything, but I am and I hate it.

Times have changed…..my parents rarely attended mine as their jobs didn’t let them cut out early. Didn’t really bother me though as I was still able to participate in what I wanted to.

When my kids were in elementary school, I asked what they most wanted me to attend - and I attended those big events and didn’t worry about the rest. I also talked with the principal of their school and let her know that I was *not* going to be the mom who was stuffing envelopes every Friday morning, but if she needed any special projects, I could help with those. She called on me for projects and didn’t expect to see me at regular volunteer events.

Each of my kids took a field trip to the state capitol when they were in 5th grade and I chaperoned that each time - it was a 12 hour round trip and it worked well for my schedule to just take off the whole day from work and my kids liked having me there. The other parents HATED it, so it worked out well for everyone!

I made most of my kids weekend sporting events and I have attended every play performance. I rarely attended holiday parties.

You pick what is important and don’t worry about the rest.

I only attend events where my kid can see me. So, no setting up for the school gala or the teacher’s luncheon. I also agree, ask the kid what’s important to them. I don’t attend everything, but I attend a lot of stuff. Also, if I can’t go- my husband will. So, generally there is one of us there at any given event.

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