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Enthusiast
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That Friday feeling
I think she’s ready for me to be done today 🤷♀️
Enthusiast
If everything is “asap”, nothing is “asap”
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Pro
Any book recommendations?
Rising Star
Good or bad time to head out on parental leave?
Rising Star
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Chief
...and this is enough Internet for you for today, buddy
Just trying to understand
And I’d just like to close out my contribution for the night by reminding OP that it seems like the top 3 most helpful responses to your question came from people who were not labeled as MBB or the senior level you asked for in their title. Again - you asked a compelling question that I think many have experienced and would have had a good viewpoint to help you think through - but please use this as a secondary learning opportunity (in addition to some of the meaningful feedback you have received here already to your primary) to consider your delivery and empathy
Appreciate it. Thank You.
Maybe you are only doing “so so good” at solving big problems for clients because your leadership is good at holding you accountable? And here your SO is holding you accountable for forgetting to purchase an MTA card but since there’s no job on the line you weren’t motivated? And it sounds like you have been dropping the ball a lot lately with your partner? Maybe you need to pretend your relationship is a client engagement
Helpful. Thank You. Much appreciated.
If you had a whole team helping manage your life full time, I’d imagine you’d do better.
Sounds like potential for a new sitcom :)
*changes title on Fishbowl* OK, now I can respond
Isn’t that the purpose of a consultant? Objectivity. From the outside it’s always is easier. Your life is just a microcosm of an organization.
I guess what I’m saying is to get objectivity and be hand held to a solution you might need an emotional consultant...aka a therapist.
Sounds like you’re spot on consistent.
I am already going through therapy as well.
Rising Star
Why do you feel like you need to be a 'big consultant' in your personal life?
Every person has a different approach to their personal life. You don't need to execute 100 things for other people, do the things that you want to do and that make you feel fulfilled.
Rising Star
I'm an SM, if that matters.
Rising Star
Client issues vs. personal life / problems are vastly different. You may be able to apply some problem solving framework to your personal life, but at the end of the day you’re getting paid to solve client issues. That comes with compensation, recognition, and promotions. There isn’t someone standing there to pat you on the back or give you a bonus when you solve your own problems.
Essentially it comes down to motivation and rewards. There’s also the reality that we often put so much time and effort into our work, that we don’t have much left for the personal stuff. Or we’re pouring ourselves into work to avoid or escape our personal lives.
How do you deal with that personally? DM me, because I really want some help, and not comfortable being judged here.
I think most Partners do a very good job of executing on their personal life. Now, if you were to ask a niched variant of that question: how well do we work with our hands (e.g. making beds, using chainsaws, using circular saws, etc.), yes, many are lacking although you would be surprised, especially the engineers, how handy they are. I cut and split wood, build furniture, can hang dry wall, etc., but I think that is a variant of your inquiry.
Thanks Everyone. Some good perspectives to think about.
Sounds like your being mind f*d. Especially since you came on here to get advice for something that you should be able to address on your own. Then limiting responses to a certain group...but on a broader platform. Like that group will placate you when the answer is obvious.
Chief
Teamwork makes the dream work
It's always easier to solve someone else's problem.
I like to think of it as similar to why a lawyer would suck defending himself, or a doctor would suck treating himself. Company challenges are removed from us, logic gets you a great plan, your willpower isn’t needed to execute, that’s on the client.
That said, sooner or later, there needs to be some semblance of sanity in your personal life eventually or great performance will be unsustainable
Thanks McK3
MCK3 - consultants are actually quite good at running their businesses. Your DIPP should highlight that.
A Harvard study defined multiple types of intelligence. While you’ve probably developed a few that benefit your line of work, you’ve neglected to develop them for more personal interests.
It’s because you use all your energy on clients
Serious but not seriously serious, I take the advice from my junior team before leadership and anything on FB.
Look, we are hired guns, I make a point of saying I am agnostic to you deploying my strategy. I want to tell you the truth in our recommendations and where to get started. Do you want me to help? Sometimes it’s yes, sometimes it’s later. It’s up to the client to pull the trigger, I gave up taking it personal when it’s no and sleep better at night.
More than once I have left a game changing roadmap with a client that did nothing. And anywhere from 6 months to 3 years later I get a call to go deploy it. Putting a recommendation into your sales funnel will lead to more failure than success. You did your best, now move to the next opportunity.
And yeah, I have 20 years in SWE
It’s easier to see how to fix someone else’s problems, than your own. When a friend is having relationship issues you always see them more clearly than the friend. Addressing your personal issues takes sitting back and assessing things without an emotional lens to make the “right” decision. I would suggest when you have the decision you then reposition yourself to include some of the emotion so you get a balanced solution for you. After all, you aren’t business, you are a person.