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Yes - for a while I was making double and now I’m making approx $70K more than him. I am debt free at this point and he still has a lot of student loan debt and car loan debt.
We’ve been together about 3 years and I’ve slowly learned what to do to avoid negative feelings about it. Staying away from conversations about big ticket items like thoughts on getting a house (we currently rent, etc.).
I have a very bougie taste in everything and I realize some things are out of his budget. I never expect him to pay 50%, I try to just keep things fair. For example, rent is $2300 per month with utilities and I only ask him for $850. When we travel, I’ll book really nice hotels/our flights and then I expect him to cover the food and other fun things to do on the trip. So then he feels he’s contributing just like I did, even though I splurged more on the flights and hotels.
I would just suggest drawing less attention to it and maybe treating both of you to some nice things occasionally without expecting her to pay half.
Not at all, and I think that would be a deal breaker for me if it happened. I'm the breadwinner and my husband has zero issue with it at all. In fact, he's proud of my accomplishments and always fully supportive. I think the first step for you would be to have a conversation. Maybe it's not what you think. But if it is, it's time for some honest communication. Personally, I couldn't be in a relationship where I felt there was this type of resentment. It's supposed to be a partnership, not a competition.
I can’t imagine doing most of the emotional and domestic labor, then also bringing home all the $$