How do you deal with a toxic manager? This manager was actually my co-worker and recently got promoted. She gives unnecessarily harsh feedback, belittles other associates, micromanages, etc. She's good friends with our upper-management, so I don't feel comfortable complaining there.

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Move jobs. I have had my fair share of bad managers and management groupism. And I have been a bad manager myself at times to my team. Learnt that its not worth ruining my future and present for these politics. If the situation doesnt improve in 3 months, start applying.

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This is so true. This happened to me. I left within 6 months. The unnecessary drama is not worth it.

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You quit. Your SAP skills make you highly mobile assuming no other terrible life circumstances.

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My suggestion would be to find a different project. Life is stressful as it is, no need to have others add to it.

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Sounds like new manager syndrome... trying too hard to be the boss. They'll learn or drown eventually. If they are a good friend, maybe you can give them some coaching or suggest to a higher up that they provide coaching.

My current project lead is the same way. I have to eat it for now, for various reasons.

The easiest way I dealt with it in the past is just meditating and realizing how impermanent the situation is.

Truth be told, we probably have a lot more tolerance with our clients, other folks and other douches. There are always new clowns in new places.

It probably only hurts your feelings because you once respected this person and only to realize the image she projected was false.

If someone has to try so hard to correct someone else at the expense of belittling others, there isn’t a lot of learning/growth I can get from that person.

If you have to use negative reinforcement to get work done, you’re probably not going to be a very good manager/leader. The purpose of a good leader is to create new talent that are self driven. Creating an environment of fear won’t really drive better results.
Sooner or later this truth will surface.

I think another factor you need to consider is that some of the damage is not only the person’s feelings but it can lead to damage to the C person’s reputation and prospects for advancement within the company. Especially if that manager has a lot of influence as is the case here. I used to think toughing it out was the best response. Experience has taught me that’s not always the case - I was being overly idealistic. Sometimes everyone else knows the truth but they are not ready to confront it.. there’s nothing in it for them. Everyone’s trying to get ahead and cannot waste precious political capital to try and save someone else.

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