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Iam planning to do certification that don't have no programming AND IT SHOULD have very good scope inmarket and able to switch within tcs with high package, please suggest me that kind of certification.TIA 🙏 Accenture Infosys IBM Amazon Tata Consultancy Bosch Group Hexaware Technologies PwC India Oracle Hitachi
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Make a rule for yourself: you aren’t allowed to explain anything (defensive response) until you have asked at least one clarifying question (later up it to two).
A clarifying question: “oh wow, I wasn’t aware of that. What would a better approach look like?”. Open receptive Learning response.
“I don’t quite follow. Help me understand so I can be one of your top performers”.
It is a technique used extensively in customer service roles. It is human nature to respond to the words presented, but most people do not express themselves clearly, completely, concisely, and accurately in a single question or emotionally charged rant. A few genuinely inquisitive questions often exposes the Real origins of a comment. Bonus: it shows the other party that you really do want to understand. The initial statement / question from the other party is often nothing more than a conversation starter.
“Seek first to understand, then to be understood”
You’re probably not defensive. You are explaining yourself and management doesn’t like being questioned.
🙌 🙌 🙌
In a conversation, you can say your piece and indicate that you agree. The more you’re given feedback around something, the less people want to hear about your piece. They want you to agree with them. The more you get this, the more you should look at the feedback convo as a script.
1. Tell them you appreciate it and will work on it.
2. If possible, show that person that you took action.
3. Where possible, like 5 months later, take that person out to coffee. They’ll begin to understand you
Try being more yourself, seems like you’re too focused on the role 😉
What do you mean?
Agree with others not every situation needs to be assertive. If you make a mistake the best way to go about it is to own it and move on. When I first started my career I was defensive and trying to be perfect but honestly once I humbled myself I performed so much better and got way better reviews and was generally more liked than before
I have an employee like that right now. So defensive for the most minor corrections to her work.
If it’s minor it’s not nitpicking …it’s constructive criticism to help the employee fix a small issue so it doesn’t grow.
The employee needs to understand that the corrections are being made to make them better and add to their value at work, not to make them sad.
Another scenario I’d like to bring up from a different role: on international group calls my (female) boss would openly be very aggressive and directly point fingers and complain, but in a confident way; no one ever said anything. Once something was said about my teams work and I responded that the statement was incorrect and explained why, and I was told ‘it’s not personal.’
Obviously there was something in my tone, but to this day I’m still confused because I 100% was not taking it personal yet on every call my boss would complain and be aggressive and no one ever said word :/
Work your way up then behaving like a babbling toddler is considered assertive.
Sometimes when you’re given feedback, the best thing you can do is take it in, ask how they feel you can improve and ask them what success would look like in their eyes. Attempts to explain each example,
Say your piece and assert yourself are absolutely going to be taken as being defensive, because that’s exactly what it is, by definition. You’re defending yourself and your character. Sometimes
Just eating the humble pie and listening and putting yourself in the shoes of the people giving the feedback will give you an opportunity to change the way they see you. Arguing the point certainly doesn’t do it.
Good luck! The fact that you want to improve is half the battle!
It's hard to glean the necessary details of your interaction style from this post - but you know you within your situation best and it makes great sense to want to understand both yourself and the other party(ies) involved.
To that end you might pick up some great self and situational analysis and navigational tools by watching videos from the Black Swan Group. It may be that their methods could help you to identify the thing you want to change whether it's within your responses or in your analysis of the situations you find yourself.
Happy to help!
Some people listen to understand. Some listen to respond. Defensive people are the latter
I need more context. Were you given examples? Sometimes it is not what you say but how you say it and your body movement including your hands that creates the impression of being defensive. I am surprised you were not given more detailed feedback and provided with suggestions how you can improve.