My current project lead won't verbally process things with me, and I feel stuck in a loop of not understanding what is happening because I have nobody to talk things through with (just me and them). When I try to talk to them, they're very "I'm telling you to do XYZ so just do it"

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There's almost nothing better in life than being understood. Without it life can feel lonely and left out. I'm saddened this is happening to you. It's not your fault. As a lead, a teacher, they should be able to teach you on the level of your understanding.

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This is absolutely true. Being understood is something I feel like we really take for granted but when you are misunderstood you realize how much life is easier when someone really sees and understands you.

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Try and see if you can have a conversation about how you process information, people tend to perceive us as being argumentative. Alternatively, you can see if there’s someone else on the team that can help you process the information.

likesmart

I don't want to say which one, but my consulting firm is horrible for ADHD and neurodivergent folks

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Set up time with them to talk about ways of working that are most effective for you. Explain what techniques will make you efficient and successful.

If they aren't accommodating, try finding another colleague who can help you verbally process, then bring your clarifying questions back to the lead.

At some point they will realize it's more efficient to go through your questions at the time (by verbally processing with you) than for you to go away and come back later asking for clarification.

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Adding to Product said, you might need to set up a 1.1 with your lead weekly or even daily so that you and the lead actually has time to discuss.

I give out work often and sometimes I don’t have time to explain in the moment. But a dedicated time to talk through your questions, would help me as a lead.

Also, when you explain, please call out that you are not looking for them to do your work. You just need clarity.

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💯 true and sad that trying to process information with a colleague is often understood as “argumentative”.

In any environment where over communicating is seen as valuable and openly encouraged, it’s particularly painful to be shot down and misunderstood by individual coworkers and leaders for wanting to communicate more openly.

My advice: try not to take it personally, try treading more carefully with those folks to keep yourself safer , and understand that this just confirms what we are talking about here—EVERYONE has sensitivities.

We all experience the world a little differently and we all can benefit and improve our environment, one interaction at a time, by being the example of behavior we wish to see in others.

It’s hard, it’s a lot of work, it’s not always fair. But if a good portion of us can regularly assume goodwill and be those examples, how that can change everything for the better.

Go to HR, request a reasonable accommodation

I hear that! My last boss wouldn't help me with things either. She kept saying, "I already showed you how to do this.". I told them in my interview that I sometimes need to be shown processes a few times, especially if it's something I don't do routinely. She wouldn't.

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How would you suggest dealing with a toxic boss? They gossip and seem to purposely be vague about critical information, likely so they can't be held accountable.

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How did you give notice you were lateraling to people you like? Particularly if you haven't been there that long?

I'm lateraling to another firm because frankly I think the management of this one is terrible, but the people (and individual partners) I actually work with are awesome. I've only been here for about 18 months, so I imagine that short time frame will make it extra awkward 😬

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Maybe stupid question....With global slowdown, does JPMC fire any new hires?

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Does Amazon India relocate Solutions architects to Onsite?

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Can we apply to Kellogg two year program round 1 and then if we get rejected apply to the Deloitte Endorsement 1 year program..?

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One of the reasons I want to transition from industry to consulting (tier 1) is that I get frustrated when I have to collaborate with mediocre people. My assumption is that Tier 1 consulting firms hire really sharp people and if I can get in, I’ll be collaborating with folks on top of their game (not expecting much from clients). I’m aware there are personal aspects I need to work on like my mindset, patience etc etc, but I just get so frustrated with blatant stupidity.

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I know that the general advice is not to cut your own time, but if you think you took WAY TOO LONG on something should you? I don’t want partners to think of me as inefficient.

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