Stub year in a free market firm frustrated about hours. Everyone was complaining about being slow last month, but it seems most passed 100 hours and I only got 60. I’ve been doing everything mgmt says to do but I’m making no progress in getting work. I can’t help but think I don’t fit in here and people don’t like me - especially because I went to a lower-ranked school, grew up poor, and am neurodivergent so networking is hard for me. Whole system feels very nepotistic. I just want to give up.

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If you are neurodivergent, a free market system may not be the best environment for you, sadly.

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Take a deep breath. People haven't had time to notice your work yet and that's fine. I made 0 networking effort during my lateral ramp up so it took longer. But after a few months, folks figured out what I'm good at and I'm not fully utilized. Ditch the comparisons and focus on doing your best.

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OP if it makes you feel better, granting that maybe I was naive, as a stub year way back in the late 2010s, everyone was like “bro your hours don’t matter” and I really took that to heart and billed ~60 hours in 2.5 months. I even took vacation in the last week of December.

When I returned , I suddenly got a few assignments and did well on them and then I was very soon drowning and easily hit 2,000 hours. If you do good work, the work will find you believe me. Especially as a first year, since diligent first years motivated to do good work as you are are always in short supply, believe me.

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Are you capturing ALL of your time and billing for everything you do? You also have time to take on pro bono or spend time learning. Spend some time reading the news and learning about the law. You’ll learn something eventually you can use for your files. I used something I read in the news today to approach a partner and tell him we needed to do more work on a contract to comply with expected regulations and made a couple suggestions on provisions we could add. I billed for the time I spent thinking about it and for 45 minutes of research/writing an email to partner about it. Partner was appreciative and used that and asked for more, which added to my hours and may get me more work in through future. Also neurodivergent. You’ll get the swing of things. You just started. It’ll come to you with time

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OP that’s not true! I recommend therapy. I also have the “nobody likes me” voice in my mind like many other neurodivergent people and I sometimes have issues reading social cues. I’ve worked at it really hard, go to therapy, and read How to Make Friends and Influeunce People. I think it’s well worth a read, and therapy can help you with confidence and dissecting social interactions you had so you can get an objective third party opinion as far as whether you did anything wrong and how to improve future interactions. I highly recommend. I still struggle with these things, but I get plenty of work now (free market firm). Also, keep at it.

Just like law school didn’t automatically click 1L year, you’re just a stub year. Everyone sucks at their jobs. They’re just good at faking it and hiding their insecurities. You can do it!!

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I’m a 2d year, had my stub year while firm was still fully remote. The ramp up period is what it is: a ramp up. Your colleagues have been trying to shorten that ramp and it seems to have worked, but ultimately the firm will want you all at high utilization. Give it time, your work does speak—I’ve gone from scraping hours and spending 8 hours a day on PLI videos to absolutely drowning in a blink of an eye when someone needs help. All it takes is one or even two cases to blow up and then you’re set.

Also, I’m at a free market firm and it’s normal for people to not start making bonus until 3d year.

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I was in the exact same position up until last week. It’s coming.

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Following. I have been losing sleep because of this. Also neurodivergent. Since I am in a central staffing system, I just assumed I would get work since I was busy the first month. Turns out everyone was being very proactive and reaching out to partners to work with me. A voice inside keeps telling me I must be terrible where ppl are deliberately not giving me work.

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