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“Fuck it I’m going to PDF this bitch"
“We had complimenting genitalia.”
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Insane. People didn't even get my name right when I started working. I can't imagine being uncomfortable based on someone not using random pronouns that I decided to designate.
I was thinking the same thing 😂 I can't remember anybody's name and I don't expect anyone to remember mine.
I’m struggling to understand why so many people are so offended and outraged at being asked to make a very small amount of effort to show basic respect to a very small group of people who have truly experienced more than their share of persecution in recent years. Trans and nonbinary people exist and have always existed. Biological sex is not a binary, there are real, proven, genetic variations and there are absolutely variations in how people experience gender. This is not a problem! We can all handle the tiny efforts needed to make everyone feel welcome and respected for who they are - and this goes beyond gender. For example, it is reasonable for people to expect their colleagues to pronounce their names correctly too, even if the name is unfamiliar and it requires effort to get it right. And just in case anyone is wondering, I am a cisgender woman (assigned female at birth, always identified as female), Gen X, from Texas.
I am non-binary.
I think that my own community is pushing this thing too far for several reasons :
1 - Non-binary is NOT trans. I am not trans. I do not desire to change my body and I don't think my suffering is even close to that of a trans person. Period, full stop.
2 - There is a HUGE amount of cultural appropriation at play that is almost never mentioned. Non-binary cultures are 18 and counting, and we're asking our society to fake it as if it was always a thing in the West - it's not the case and that's not how it works.
Enforcing something by making people feel bad because we suddenly want to play having the same culture as indigenous societies with 3 genders is the PEAK of woke irony.
Also, making people feel terrible about things they don't know/are trying to get accommodated to on purpose is genuinely one of the least kind thing anyone can do.
To top if all of, while singular "they" is indeed a thing in English, other langages like French use lazy mashups like "ielle" which is literally "hshe" (il/elle = he/she).
I refuse for this travesty of "respect" to be used as my pronoun, full stop. It's literally laughing at us.
Overall if you're a trans person then yes this is genuine.
There are also biological variations in trans people.
Personally I do not think that me as a non-binary individual which is how I choose to identify and not anything else as far as I'm concerned, has the right to be this incredibly asinine about this.
It's like a physician always telling people wrong because this and that scientific thing was disproven 24/7 - ok, we get it.
"This table isn't solid is 90% void" cool beans, and it IS true.
But will I try to explain that to everyone all the time? Please end me.
Personally I have tried and figured out that not caring was far better for my mental health. However as I said, I do not experience gender dysphoria so that's speaking for myself and also other enby people who I think may feel the same but won't voice their concerns to a community that has mostly excluded me and misgendered me more than anyone for appearing as male - ironic, isn't it? - and I get it.
Tell them maybe this isn't the right job for them.
In manufacturing / Industrial work we don't have time or patience for such stupidity. Ditto for emotions. Leave your butt-hurt feelings at the security gate. We are here to make the best possible product as safely and efficiently as possible. Period. There are no "safe spaces" here and no one cares about how you want to be addressed if calling you by your name (or nickname) doesn'tmeet your desires. It's nothing personal and is not considered disrespectful in any way in the real world. Better grow some tougher skin or you are in for a miserable life. And since most Gen-z'ers want to talk about Respect ----- Respect is EARNED not given. You want to be respected in the workplace? Work hard, do your job well, COME TO WORK. EVERY DAY. ON TIME!!!! And keep your personal politics to yourself.
I would fire them asap as at will
Employees. They should be more focused on doing their job and not making silly ridiculous demands. A ton of people that would love to take their job.
I would recommend the companies EAP program where they can get some help for their mental illness. If that doesn’t work then pink slip them asap.
the manager needs to do better. if you didn't know the gender of someone but were talking about them, you would automatically use they/them with no issue. if someone asks for they/them, just do better to use those pronouns.
using they/them is formally acceptable when you don't know someone... if you do know them, then it's unprofessional. Maybe I should only refer to myself in the 3rd person from now on.
First, I believe people can be called whatever they want.
But more importantly, I think it's time we added a pronoun that just means a person. One that's appropriate to use in any situation. I like the Xe/Xir one that's been proposed.
Then we don't have to worry about what to say about an unknown user. It the past, we default to the masculine. Then "he or she", "he/she", and "s/he". I really don't like being expected to give my pronouns, I believe that no matter what I say, someone won't like it.
In a professional setting, I'd like to keep things simple. That goes with gender based titles. "Chairman" is now just "chair". We have just doctors (not doctresses). But we still have Congressman and Congresswoman.
Mostly, I'm just lazy and don't want to memorize anything I don't need to.
But that's just me.
It's really simple. It's biology. Your sex / gender is determined by chromosomes. Male (XY) or Female (XX).
I am so tired of hearing that gender is a social construct. That is just a bullshit way of saying that we need more division, and this is a way of adding to it. You aren't special to anyone other than your mommy, and POSSIBLY your daddy. Quit trying to be special in everyone else's eyes.
Gotta say I'm pretty disappointed in the comments that are completely ignoring the question "How would you intervene?" by being blatantly transphobic. Clearly, telling the new hire that they're abnormal and need to abandon their entire identity would very very likely get you fired.
So my advice would be to ensure that the new hire feels as welcomed as possible, and it's important to politely correct people whenever they use the wrong pronouns. Standing up for someone who's being misgendered (intentionally or not) can do wonders for their confidence in the workplace.
Additionally, if there are employees behaving like some of the people in the comments, don't forget to get HR involved!
I understand the feeling using they/them is outside the norm. So feels strange.
In your position, I would meet with them both together, over coffee. In a private area of the cafeteria or a conference room. Keep it light and congenial.Both side can express their position and needs, and you act as neutral arbiter.
Both sides have valid points. The new employee wants/needs to be respected and accepted for who and what they are and how they express themselves.
And for the manager, this is new territory, so they need time to adjust. But the manager being the manager, its more incumbent on them to show leadership, AND vulnerability as they adjust to the new reality.
This can backfire badly
I think at the last place I worked at, we had one join us, and was gone in 3 months.
People who are nonbinary or don't adhere to traditional gender norms have existed for centures? Why do we think Native Americans have a two spirit identity. Accounts of transgender people have been uncertainly identified going back to ancient times in cultures worldwide as early as 1200 BC Egypt.
Why is no one treating this like a legitimate workplace conflict that deserves their attention, and is instead devolving to attacking either person for who they are? I don't think either party is to blame, and I certainly don't think that a legitimate expression of humanity (ie. being nonbinary) is a mental illness or some "new age crap"? This is the problem with the US as it stands today — no one has respect for one another, and it makes the they/them person feel like the person messing up their pronouns legitimately direspects them when in fact, they're just making a simple mistake. And it's giving people some fake excuse to make fun of the nonbinary person.
Honestly, just make it apparent to the Gen Z person that XYZ manager is having trouble adjusting but wants to. Ask the person to give their manager more time and explain that it's not coming from a place of disrespect. Maybe discuss how to navigate this situation with HR or legal too so that this doesn't turn into a larger debacle
Why do people have to cater to a small fraction of the population's body dismorphia issues?
Terminate your they/them - they will be an HR nightmare and have already gave you signals thats the path they/them are going.
Get some people who want to work and not make an individual attending seeking statement. They/Them had their 4 year run thats over
Yeah this is crazy, you shouldnt have to use someones prefferred pronouns just because they dont think they are a girl or a boy, if SHE is a GIRL then HER pronouns are gonna be the same as all the other girls and you'll be saying "they" when referring to multiple people not just one, this never used to be a thing and i would not condone this behaviour in the workplace
In my opinion its confusing and just creates chaos where it doesn't need to be, also not to mention the fact that not everyone has the same beliefs
People don't normally use Them/They pronouns when talking about a single person. Explain to the Gen Z person that this can be a hard adjustment, but reassure them that it's not personal. Tell them that it's ok to correct the manager. Tell the manager that you told the new hire this would happen. When I changed my pronoun, I had to correct people.
I used to think this was weird and not worth my concern. I was largely intolerant and didn't get it at all. A friend gave me the book "A Psalm for the Wild-Built" by Becky Chambers. It is a beautiful vision and the characters use they/them. It was very difficult to read at first but after I became accustom to it, I got it, on multiple levels. It expanded my previously limited understanding and I believe I am better for it.
Gender pronouns are not professional and people need to stop thinking they need to be offended so easily!
You need to use them during a professional manner unless you want to lose your client. I don't know how consulting works but I feel like making sure your client is comfortable talking to you and feels safe at the same time is a win-win. I dunno that's just me.
Call them Risley and move on, the kid is there to do a job not be coddled.
By law whatever a person's identification/license card states that person's sex is then the supervisors, management, or administration are only legally obligated to call them by their rightful gender and nothing else. If any person would like to be called otherwise that is their business. But if the manager is willing to learn to become accustomed to saying their pronouns then you should give them time to learn.
Must be a joke! There are only 2 genders and you cannot force people, especially at work, to adjust to your mental illness. Work is for work, if you have psychollogical disorder, go talk to a psychiatrist.
You want to practice your way of life, that's fine, just don't do it at work.
It's literally no different than trying to force a religion or political stance on someone else.
You're at work to work, not convert people into your way of living.
I am 78 years old went back into the workforce 2 years ago at age 76 because the economy was killing me but I worked with lots of genzers and would like to have some gen zers who actually do the job they were hired and not worry about pronouns or how many piercings they have and where they are. I have a couple of tats and pony tail and work circles around the gen zers I have encountered
Fire them. Pronouns are a way for others to identify a 3rd person. It has nothing to do with the person's internal identity. Although gendered pronouns may be used around the person they refer to, they are never used directly at the person. It is NARCISSISTIC/SELF-CENTERED to try and force everyone to identify you based on your internal identity, ESPECIALLY the utterly retarded "they/them" pronouns. These people need to get a grip or give the rest of us grace.