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I’m not sure how this will impact this bowl, but it is worth pointing out the need to assess whether there should be concern for those in this bowl. While we all understand ADHD is something attorneys are completely capable of managing with legal positions, not everyone in the field agrees with that. https://joinfishbowl.com/post_va66ztgmkw
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Please don’t feel bad. You’re alright, and no one would ever dare to doubt how much you love your kid.
It seems all you care about at the moment is your child, did you find an arrangement with your ex on how to co-raise the kid post-divorce?
Really sorry you’re going through this 💛
But sometimes it’s for the best, and I hope you’ll come to realize as much in time.
I know you didn’t ask, but at least try for joint custody / more than just weekends if possible. Now that I’m 26 and have realized my dad didn’t even try to get more time with us when my parents divorced over 20 years ago, it kind of hurts (and he wasn’t an absent parent by any means). I know everyone has their own reasons for not pursuing custody and sometimes it’s not even feasible, but at least try, if you can. Your kids can easily put two and two together when they’re older when you don’t.
Hey there,
I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. I firstly want to reassure you that you are NOT a failure for having a divorce. Unfortunately sometimes that is how the cookie crumbles.
I can hear the love you have for your child, and it sounds to me very much a case that you and your ex can and should find a way to co-parent.
I hope it gets better for you
Will do my best. I was having a lot of aspirations to spend a lot of time with him and just enjoy those moments while he's still a toddler. I feel helpless now. I start imagine all sorts of bad outcomes when a kid lives away from his father. I pray for him every day! I am also afraid my worry about him will have a counterproductive effect. A lot of overthinking right now
OP, you are in the position my parents found themselves in when I was a child. There had been no divorces in either family. Both raised in religious households. In retrospect, I suspect that my father had ADHD (Thanks, Dad!). Divorcing was absolutely the right decision—for them and for me. Sure, things were different for me than for kids whose parents were still together, but I was so young that I have no memory of them being together. For me, what I was living was what was normal! Be kind to yourself. Sometimes things will go amazingly and sometimes you’ll wish they went better, but most of the time you’re going to do just fine.
I grew up in a home with parents who separated when I was a toddler. I was closer to my mom below 10 and then much closer with my dad after that and through to this day.
My parents wanted nothing to do with each other but were willing to be cooperative around me and gave me some choice as I was old enough to do so.
Relationships fail and raising children is hard but think it’s healthier to try define your goal in how you parent your kid vs the relationship at this point. My folks are in no way perfect but I deeply respect how they handled this part of parenting