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Starting a new job at Applied Materials on Monday as a Manufacturing Engineer III. I’ve been out of college for 5 years and all of my work experience till now has been in R&D for start ups and small businesses . So not only is this a new experience for me going into such a large company but also a industry (semiconductors). Does anybody has tips or advices on what I should expect as a new hire and how I can set myself up for success? Thanks!
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For being the cringiest
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Bowl Leader
I listened to Motorsport 4 times this morning.
Enthusiast
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Chief
Well, you could try therapy.
Or.
My personal favorite: yet another confession that can be solved by a mature, adult conversation.
Why does he say he’s not showering? Does he not care about hygiene?
Pro
Well. Having been married >10 years, I can tell you that now is about as good as it’ll get in the whole looking/smelling best for the other department.
Enthusiast
Confessions is my favourite bowl thank you.
Chief
Me too. 😂
Not showering after gym is not normal. If he takes the feedback I guess that’s ok, but what other behaviors does he have if he thinks that is acceptable? I wouldn’t write him off immediately but I wouldn’t be planning the wedding either
SM1 I already had several conversations with him on this issue. He dismisses my concerns and thinks I am nagging so I stopped asking but I did stop seeing him after he works out. I have brought up several times that this is an issue for me in the future.
Rising Star
I think you can solve this in a very mature way. I’ll give you the rundown.
1- Skip showers for 3 days
2- use the same underwear all of this days
3 - ask him to go down on you.
🤢🤢🤢
If my partner don’t shower after the gym I’m dumping their ass
Same, that’s gross
Basic hygiene is expected from each other while in a relationship. This may seem like a small thing but it may lead to you losing attraction for them in future. If he thinks it’s a small thing, why doesn’t he just do it. Not like he is going to lose anything by spending ~5 mins in shower. My gf doesn’t shower as much as I do. I spoke to her about it and now she does it more frequently than before as she knows it bothers me. Love her for that!
I am glad your gf did that for you!
Maybe he thinks his musky sweat makes him more manly. Either way, just dump him and move on
Pro
If I’m home alone, and I’m going to wash my hair in the morning or I have another workout in the morning, I don’t always shower right after the gym. Maybe just communicate that it bothers you? It’s a small thing to change, so they’ll probably understand.
I understand not washing hair as a women but I don't know why it bothers me that he does not shower his body and I find that gross.
Enthusiast
This seems like an OCD thing to me. It’s not the fact that it’s currently impacting her, because it’s not, but rather her concern that it’s going to bother her down the road. I can see a reasonable guy not want to engage on an issue that’s not a current concern. I’m not sure this is a red flag that the guy won’t consider her issues. OP - do you have OCD tendencies in other areas?
EY2 It is also a current concern but it is temporarily fixed because I stopped seeing him after he works out since he would be dismissive about it. I also think that wanting your partner to have basic hygiene does not equate to having OCD.
Yet another confession that can be solved by a breakup.
If showering after fluid excretion or stankedness isn't a trigger to shower, what is?
Does he not break a sweat or something? (to be clear, still not a good excuse IMO)
I mean that’s just gross from a hygiene perspective. I imagine he showers, just not right away? Regardless, he should strongly consider changing that behavior for his own benefit.
have you learned to just accept it? that you’re not going to change him? if you can’t and it’s really a dealbreaker, then move on. if it’s something you can work through, do that
I tried but you are right probably need to move on.
Well, how do you think things are going to go when you live with him? Do you think that is the only thing he does that will likely bother you? I suspect there are going to be many more things…
By the way, is it more that he doesn’t shower or the fact that this is something that bothers you and he is dismissive about it?
Thanks A1! You are a wise one. Yes, it seems to be a compatibility issue so I don't think I will be pursuing anything further.
Enthusiast
What are the other things that bother you?
Thanks SM1! Are you sure you are not a therapist? You are good at this.
Does he shower before he goes to bed at least? One of my old coworkers told me once that her husband would have a soccer game and not shower before going to bed. I was at college so didn’t think much about whether I hurt people’s feeling or not but I literally said: “That is disgusting, how do you sleep with him?”