My wife is constantly coming up reasons why she thinks our daughter is autistic. The slightest arm flap when she is excited, walking on her toes for 4 steps out of the thousands she’s take, etc. I’m losing my patience and don’t know how else to support her. She always had bad health anxiety about herself but I’m not okay with her putting it onto our daughter. She won’t see a therapist/acknowledge she may have health anxiety. Any suggestions?

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Get your daughter evaluated by a medical professional to determine if your wife’s concerns about her are founded or not.

Then deal with the results.

If the concerns are unfounded that may get your wife to chill. And a doctor may be able to discuss your wife’s anxiety and recommend options. A recommendation from a third party will be a lot more effective than one from you.

like

Schedule a visit with the pediatrician and have her attend as well. Let them tell her there is nothing there.

If you are worried about her starting some Munchausen by proxy issues, it might be a good idea to let the pediatrician know of your concerns. They could then look at any "issues" that your wife thinks your daughter has with a more critical eye.

like

Agreed with the other comments here - get your daughter squared away first. My wife was similar and after extensive evaluation, our daughter was diagnosed with an auditory processing delay and it took a decade plus' worth of therapy to ensure a smoother life. We've met a lot of people that waited a long time before looking into, hoping things were just one offs or phases, and they missed critical years of development.

If it's something, you'll need to adjust your perception and be a team player in the therapy process. If it's nothing, your wife may need to take a step back for personal evaluation with potential help. Either way, put your child first and get your own ego out of the way.

like

So if your child is less than kindergarten school they are fine. Social media postures young mothers to believe their child is autistic. Your pediatrician has a test, but if the child isn’t old enough they won’t even be able to do the things and if you answer the questions I assure you….your answers will show your child is not autistic and your wife’s answers will show your child is. Tell her stop reading and looking to for evidence and stop projecting herself onto the child. Probably will make a fight. Reminds me of my wife. She actually had Postpartum depression and tried to hide it from herself by projecting Autism onto our child. Our son is now 11 and a 3.9 average 5th grader without Autism and she overcame her PPD after about 3-4 years. Was terrible for everyone but my wife needed the help of two psychologists and a neuropsychologist who actually saved her life mentally.

like

Some of that is true, in particular the social media aspect...but First Steps (free in every state under 36 months) provides both remarkable testing and therapy, which is critical at those ages. You will absolutely kick yourself forever for not starting as soon as possible. Do it. Worst case in doing it is a few blown afternoons. Worst case in not doing is losing those invaluable developmental years.

like

Is this your first? I completely and fully get her. I was the exact same way too.

Two things that helped me immensely:

1. Stop googling stuff. Immediately and completely.

2. Get Therapy. Get help. Get Therapy

like

Try not to lose your patience. She obviously has anxiety about your child and a dispute won't make it better. Your wife might have some degree of OCD too. My wife has gone through phases of health concerns for our kids and I talk her through it and try to show her more common and simple explanations. The doctor is a last resort if the perceived symptoms persist. And I sternly remind her not to Google symptoms.

I would immediately go to a child psychologist that specializes in asd diagnosis otherwise you’ll just spin on this … I had the same issue where we would google everything and spin except turned out it was asd … diagnosis got us services and no longer had to spin on it …reg pediatricians did not detect it

I just want to say, I love this bowl. Great answers all around dads. Anywhere else on Fishbowl, you get 20yr olds saying “that’s a red flag”, “you should tell her if she doesn’t change you’ll leave.”

Related Posts

Any books to recommend on mental strength?

like

Anyone practice DUI in Orange County, CA? Please dm me. TIA

like

Guys, have you gone through some traumatic experiences, or realized somethings that unnecessarily cause you to be too aware instead of living your best life? If so, how were you able to reconnect...

like

Currently at Strategy& and thinking about MBA in 1-2 yrs. I went to an HYPSM for undergrad but have a 3.4 GPA due to mental health issues senior year. If I hit average GMAT, is M7 realistic? cont..

like

Do you think people working in the pharma industry will gain more trust, respect, or positive vibes in 2021 after vaccines are widely distributed? Right now it’s the industry with one of the lowest perception scores

likefunny

Hello, I’m currently looking for a non clinical position in the Charlotte area, more in the public health field. Does anyone have any referrals or info on any jobs?

After 10 years of working as a FTE PM/producer I’ve now been laid off (thanks Covid) and am looking to start freelancing for the first time. What advice do you have for a new freelance PM/producer?
Also, what kind of insurance do you take out as a freelancer?

like

Here's a question I wish I never had to ask. Is it better to use the code for bereavement leave or just burn pto I'm going to lose anyway? Does it make a difference from a utilization standpoint?

like

Fellow fasting fish, how do you maintain energy when we can’t have coffee or water? I’ve been cracking windows, showering first thing, and using certain essential oils 😅 trying not to yawn on these morning video calls!

like

I almost self harmed but stopped by grabbing something strong and drinking it straight. I've calmed down a little but this is the first time I turned to alcohol to cope. As long as I don't mix it with pills it's ok right.... I'm deep in self hate & shame now.

like

Friendly reminder that depression is a protected disability. File paperwork with your company and they legally cannot destroy your health by overworking you.

like

Hi! I’m doing some research on employee benefits (medical insurance, 401k, HSA/FSA, commuter benefits) and was hoping to connect with People specialists or HR professionals in the comp & benefits space. I’m trying to better understand any pain points or challenges you might face with utilization/enrollment. Anyone interested in connecting? Thank you!

Pandemic induced pressure & burnout. Is every agency bad at present? Desperate to move on before it kills me but worried it’s not diff anywhere else. Hearing people are off sick in lots of agencies.
Or does anyone have positive experiences to share?

like

Have you been able to spend more time with your kids during the pandemic? How?

like

How supportive are your companies when it comes to taking PTO for mental health days?

likesmart

Anyone have wrist guard recommendations for weightlifting? I have small wrists and they don’t love a lot of pressure.

How to politely tell my partner stop spending too much time on playing video games? It was my false at first. I introduced Zelda breathe of the wild to her and now, she is hooked. She even played game when we had the movie night. I chose the her movie style but she let me to watch it alone and silently turned on the game, and played it while pretended to watch the movie with me. That’s not fun at all. What should I do? Any advice please?

likefunny

I started a new job a month ago and that just so happened to be when my birth control decided to screw with my emotions. I can barely hold it together already and I have the added stress of a new job and it being busy season. I don’t know what to do. I cry multiple times daily. I don’t know how to keep going.

like

WFH parents - what’s your routine and how old are your kids? Struggling to find one for me.

More Posts

I live in NYC and recently started interviewing for positions in VA. On average, the offers are higher than the ones I’ve received in NY. I have 11 years of experience, worked for Google, AOL and a VC firm. Does tech companies in Northern VA provide higher comps on average vs NYC?

like

Started as a fresher in Capgemini with 6.8LPA. I switched to PwC few Months back.

CCTC in PwC AC : 11lpa with 2.10YOE.
Oracle Practice - Fusion Technical Developer

Is this package good enough or I'm underpaid and need to make another switch?
Your comments.

like

Hi guys looking for a job switch after 3 years in TCS Highly appreciated if anyone can provide me referral in infosys.

Profile : Data Scientist ML(Computer Vision, NLP)
Relevant YOE: 2

like

Any good referrals for criminal defense attorney in PA? The sister of someone I know was accosted while moving, she went indoors and called the police who did not show, then once back outdoors she got into an altercation w/ the person who accosted her but was only trying to defend herself. Now the aggressor has pressed charges. Please lmk ASAP !

likehelpful

I have a real estate client who at the top of his organization chart owns is 50/50 partners in a real estate investment company. First question is it advantageous to have the top of the organization 50/50 partners own the r/e company as an s-corp? That 50/50 company then owns 70% of holding company they own all the real estate as a partnership that the original partners are 35/35 and the investors own the remainder. All the real estate deals are then owned by this holding company.

like

Anyone interested dm me

Post Photo
helpful

So I finally got around to watching the Bear. Thoughts? They did get the frantic element right and the little details. But my family at Thanksgiving all seemed to think it was basically a documentary

like

Anyone gave interview in PWC UK for Audit Senior Associate?? Can you suggest set of questions asked in the interview and how was you experience?

like

Guys off topic
D laptop pickup ke liye formals me jana padega kya

like

Just got laid off! Any lead Recruiter or Recruiting management opportunities looking for a recruiter with 10+ yrs of agency and in house tech recruiting?

like

I hope you don’t mind, but I just have to brag. I QUIT MY JOB TODAY. Farewell, Karens.

like

Does anyone else feel that #detoxwork was a fad and had no impact whatsoever or is it just me?

How well can I live in Chicago on $55,000 a year? Also, I have no student loan debt coming out of undergrad.

like

Moving from Asia to London, and just received an offer for a corporate strategy role. Do UK companies typically offer signing bonus? Wondering if it’s something viable to nego for. 4 YoE

like

EYers what’s the salary band for GPS Advisory Managers?

like

How many days will it take for Wells Fargo to release the offer letter ?
I attended my interview and got shortlisted as well, I just got an email stating congratulations and send us list of documents !! After which When I try contacting the HR, he's not responding !! What do I do in such case !!
Kindly Advise...

like

What is the Salary range for a Client Service Lead at Slalom?

like

You know how when you do something bad to someone else you get bad karma w that person? Who decided who was in the wrong? What if you both think you’re right? Who gets the karmic debt?

like

In investment management at Deloitte. Wrapping up my second year here and looking to jump into a FP&A role/ valuation analyst. Is this a reasonable jump and what would salary expectations be?

like

Hey Bowl,
I work for a late stage(ipo) start up, earlier this year we were acquired & since then they got rid of our yearly bonuses and gave us an ESOP grant.
2 RIFs later we are almost bare bones. Since we are coming up on our usual yearly evaluations many of us assumed (with multiple conversation from our managers) that pay raises and promotions were due.
In a recent All hands we found out that this year there will be no pay raises nor promotions based off merit. Is it time to jump ship?

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal