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Thoughts on Candace Owen’s video today?
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Run lol
It’s a serious thing you need to address up front. These spending decisions will impact your choices later in life including how to save for retirement, housing, vacations, and other things in life. And just because you’re making money today, you may not have job security later on.
Exactly! We’ve been living together for this whole quarantine and theres been some minor occurrences of this but nothing too dramatic. This however raises some major major red flags to me and I’m kinda worried
I’d be very concerned that you’re predominantly a wallet in the minds eye of your partner. I’d be tangentially concerned that this person is not mature enough for serious commitment as they present themselves as shallow, materialistic and self possessed.
At the end of the day, only you know her true character. But, it doesn’t sound good. My girlfriend goes out of her way to ask for less whenever she has the ability to provide input, though I’d never give her less than she deserves which to me is everything. She would never dream of setting monetary expectations on anything I would gift her. The idea is honestly preposterous to me.
Yeah agreed. The first time I’ve been forever in love so a little all over the place thinking about this, but it is a major concern I’m thinking through
Rising Star
Different values on finances and arguments over spending habits are some of the biggest drivers of divorce. This is not one area where “opposites attract” is a good thing. You really need to be aligned or everything will become a struggle and feel transactional in your marriage.
It could be that she is getting caught up in what her friends are doing and is wanting the same lifestyle. If she is, that is going to be a battle you will face forever unless she can learn to be happy with whatever you have as a couple, especially if she is the lower earners of the two of you.
I would absolutely not get engaged until you work through some of these topics. There are some good resources out there for couples on finances.
Yeaah we’ve talked about it but sorta ended on a “agree to disagree” type page. We moved in together kinda quick in my opinion due to the pandemic starting, but it went super well
I know a few people who have spent that much on a ring, but to have that sort of expected of me would leave a very bad taste in my mouth. I’d probably find a new girlfriend if we can’t talk it out a bit
We’re pretty solid otherwise and have been living together for 9 months now. This is the first major red flag but it does really worry me
No one should tell you how much you need to spend on them. That’s crazy. Do you tell her how much sex you expect from her?
How old are you? A couple thoughts here:
-as you age, you seem to see things like ring cost as less important so she seems young to me
-you need to talk to her about it & finances in general. if you can’t do that, you shouldn’t be toge her
Okay the probing questions deff a good approach
She’s being influenced by her friends/ social media. She should get off that shit and do some self reflection so as to not get pulled into unrealistic ideas.
Its more the attitude towards spending
I appreciate the wisdom here! It’s my first serious relationship, i sorta messed around for a really long time, so road bumps or major issues here are all sorta new territory
Just like someone else said. Run. The real her is coming out. Run faster!
How does she feel about prenups