Related Posts
Conversation Starter
Investor’s Business Daily: worthwhile?
Mutual funds you have your eye on right now?
How is the AMEX account in IBM?
More Posts
Need 11 likes to unlock dm
NEXT MOVEMENT: PUT AN END TO UNPAID EXTRA HOURS!
Additional Posts in Personal Investment Chatter
Rising Star
Rising Star
Conversation Starter
Rising Star
What do you think on buying JPM, WFC, C now?
Conversation Starter
Investor’s Business Daily: worthwhile?
Mutual funds you have your eye on right now?
Anyone looking at airline stocks or ETF play?
Pro
Any good ETFs to invest Roth into?
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
I think it really depends on the situation of each family member. One thing you should think about is whether these amounts are gifts or loans. If you are not reasonably getting paid back, then just call it a gift and save yourself the expectation of repayment.
My husband provides financial support to his mom. He sends her money every month and it is part of our budget. He supported his grandmother when she was still alive. He is an immigrant and his family is in his home country, so they need the additional funds. I am 100 percent ok with this and would continue supporting his mom even if something happened to my husband.
On the other hand, his brother lives in the US and used to ask us for money. We never gave him any because he is one of those guys that will ask for money for rent but show up in a BMW with designer sunglasses, etc. 🙄 We always say, “get on a budget, get your priorities straight, we’re not supporting this lifestyle for you.”
TLDR: look at the needs of each family member and why they are asking for money to determine whether you want to provide the support. Consider it a gift and not a loan if you aren’t getting the money back.
Pro
Hard to say if it really helps them. If it is needed, call it a gift and not a loan so you don't expect it back.
Could you help by providing groceries instead of just giving them cash?
If it's a parent/sibling emergency I'd consider under specific circumstances. Outside of that probably not. Assume you will never get the money back.
I make it a habit to drive a 10 year old car and not do anything too publicly flashy. If people ask for money I just tell them I'm crushed by student loans and credit card debt.
I agree with PM1. When I paid off my loans, I didn't tell some of my friends and family because I didn't want them thinking I could be their bank. Personally, you don't owe your family anything. Stop for a second and ask yourself, what would they do if you couldn't help them? They usually end up finding another way.
Rising Star
I think it’s incredibly awkward. There’s also cultural layers to it. When I first started working, my Mom suggested that I direct deposit my pay checks into my parents’ bank account. She was completely serious.
Before you give anyone money, ask yourself whether you could live with never seeing that amount returned to you. Chances are that you will never be paid back if they’re having to ask for money.
I think it’s okay to give a close family member money if they truly have an emergency. Otherwise it can create an unhealthy cycle of them asking you for money simply because “you have money.”
It depends on your family. I’ve given a couple grand to my brother when he needed it, but... he dropped out of college for a few years to raise me & my sis. I will give them any amount in a heartbeat, but I also know they are responsible adults and won’t go to Vegas with my money.
My mom on the other hand, is a hard no
Rising Star
My mom has always paid me back.
My sister hasn't but different circumstances and she's now married.
Would it for it again for my mom? Yes. She's just by herself now and I seem to be in the best position to support her some I'm doing the best be I can have her be ready for retirement.
Couldn't have done this all 8 years ago when she filed bankruptcy, but I now know all the details about her finances and help get her to a spot where there are no cash flow issues.
2 years out of school and by living at home I’ve saved north of 40k and have paid off my loans. I’ve helped out both my parents and sibling in the past (totaling around 8k) out of a sense of obligation, recognizing I’m in a good spot financially, but I feel conflicted to do so again as I start to set myself up for investing in the next year. What are your thoughts on helping out the fam?
Pro
It all depends on what they need the money for . But assume you will never get it back
Loaning- hard no.
Giving- depends on amount and reasoning.
family is ok , but not friends. I had bad experiences with friends, they don't even reply to your call when time to pay back