After working 5+ years and letting life happen, I ended up back with a staff title (no career/group change). Everyone said I was doing well throughout my career. But most of peers are now managers, senior managers, directors, controllers, etc. I really don’t want to compare, but how do I deal with this so it doesn’t bother me? Has anyone else been in this situation? I feel partly ashamed because all of the work I put in didn’t get me very far in my career.

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I am a career switcher - I spent a few years up a path that wasn't right for me. I'm a tax senior at age 36. I don't compare myself to other people because they haven't had my life. A lot of people our age made job decisions in the climate of the last recession. It's easy to forget how many struggle years there were when employers held all the power. We got burned out and paid peanuts. I'm thrilled to be where I am right now - senior at a mid-sized firm that doesn't treat employees like crap. Maybe that's lowered expectations from the last recession. Like you said, life happened. Sometimes you get ambushed. Imo the relevant factor is that YOUR life happened to YOU and no one else has been there in the same way, so you really can't compare. The upside is that you have experiences that other people don't and those do wind up being valuable in the end.

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Start job hopping every 2 years and aim for a promo on jump and earn next title before leaving. Ie associate-> exp senior hire-> manager promo if possible. You can hop for 20-30% min salary and aim for title too, but I’m more of a cash promo type.

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In this economy it’s really frequent to get a large bump to make the move even if for lateral jumpers. If overpaid in PA can go industry and back to PA. I made the move twice in 2 years and I doubled my comp from $70s as senior to $100 manager to $1XX as an experienced manager. YMMV, but keep interviewing if it sounds interesting and don’t accept less than what is worth it for your career progression.

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I took a break in my career for family and got back to full time like 2 years ago. Most of my staff in prior company have become partners and managing directors. I was a senior manager then and am a senior manager now. Best not to compare..but aim higher and hunt for better opportunities. I have no regrets!

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Its hard not to compare. Maybe changing a different company? I don't think ones title defines success in life, although others would argue differently. Life is more than our work and our titles.

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In this position now and am finally leaving the firm by end of year 🙃

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I find the easiest way to not compare is I just don’t care what my peers are doing 🤷🏼‍♂️

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I’d focus less on title and more on the following: are you being paid fairly, is the work interesting, are the people around you respectful. I’m also emphasizing focusing on comp. I’ve met tax directors who make less than some managers, so don’t let titles fool you.

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did you work 5 years without getting promoted?

I’ve gotten promoted, but since life happened, I ended up with a staff title at a different company. I hear all these comments about how the job market is hot and so many people are leaving for 20%-30% pay increase (or getting retention bonuses), but that wasn’t my experience even after going through several interviews. Wth am I doing wrong?

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