AITA: My friend keeps asking me for financial advice. I set up a budget for her and have her concrete advice. And I field all of her investing questions. But still, she continues to be reckless with her money. She’s 42, single (no kids), and making $100k+ and is still living check to check.

I don’t want to waste my breathe on helping her since nothing seems to be getting through to her. AITA?

likehelpful
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

NTA. As someone who has only recently gotten out of the bad habits of your friend - it's an emotional/mindset issue, not a lack of knowledge one, and until she confronts whatever is driving the spending habits, be it adhd dopamine seeking, or trauma-based f'd up relationships with money, no amount of advice is going to make a dent.

like

About 5 years of therapy to get to the root of the issues that were causing me to use spending as a self-soothing behaviour, + adhd diagnosis and medication to help cope with the dopamine seeking and impulse control issues.

I'm now chipping away at the $12k in credit card debt, but I at least have 3mo of savings instead of being paycheck to paycheck

Tell her to all-in ETH

funnylike

It’s not your problem. Stop wasting energy on this and just tell her straight up that you’ve helped where you could and she needs to go to a financial planner. Stop the conversation when she brings it up. The end

like

I don’t know what AITA means

helpful

Oh, then I say no.

NTA, she's an adult. You don't have to help her. You've already done more than enough.

like

If you're not a licensed financial advisor, be careful with giving "financial advice" also since you may be caught into this weird liability.

Right now her issue is due to own spending. But if she were to put money into investments on whatever you suggested, things could get tricky.

like

What I would give to be making 100k+. Maybe she’s just reckless period. You’re not the asshole, maybe she just needs to find a financial advisor. Since you two are friends, I’d draw the line and redirect her to that suggestion.

No, you’ve done all that you can. It’s up to her to heed your advice or just plan to work for life (or marry someone who can support her)

No savings??

No savings!

Have you expressly told her what spending behaviors not to do?
I had to do that with someone else to get change

LG&LG you did what you could

NTA

Yeah sounds like an any other issue drinking, over eating, drugs, etc. the person struggling has to make these changes when they decide to take responsibility for themselves

Direct her to Voya

Related Posts

Start raising cash family. Take some profits. 4/14 3:51 est

like

Any story to share if you are caught knowingly or unknowingly trading on a non approved broker platform for stocks

like

Is it better to have SFH for monthly cash flow or passive MF deals through a private syndicate? Friend told me that you need to have $1.5m invested in MF to generate 60k a year approx but it’s much better than dealing with tenants and maintenance. Just wanted to get peoples thoughts on becoming financially free through these two real estate methods

like

Can anyone tell me where I can declare a home loan in the Payroll portal?

I am a little confused...

like

I joined KGS 4 months back. I am taking home loan now. Do I need to inform about my home loan to any one in our company? Any one please help me with this query? Infosys KPMG Tata Consultancy Accenture PwC Wipro EY Cognizant

like

Anyone own a condo and tenting it out in the DMV area? What HOA/Condo Fee are you looking at? Is $590 too much for an investment property? TIA!

like

I be wanting to go off but then I check my bank app, calm down, and keep working.

likefunny

I am 25 years old with roughly no savings. I am a consultant with a technical background. Are there any tips in side jobs/ways to make more money for savings?

like
like

How does the housing market work exactly, like, what determines whether prices go up or down?

like

👀 Can we talk smack about auditors? Trial balances based on filed financials are still trash once it comes time to do returns, so all I’m saying is materiality can kiss my a**

like

I just started a new job and am about to be 36. I want to start a family but I feel like I should be waiting due to this new job. However I don’t want to miss out. I’m thinking about freezing my eggs

like

How is the AMEX account in IBM?

like

My wife reads nearly an entire book per day just in her spare time after work, no exaggeration. I’m amazed by her and wondering what ideas are out there to monetize her skill? Book editing maybe?

likefunnysmart

Any thoughts on buying the PRCH dip? One of the high valuation stocks that got killed the last 6 months; however strong analyst consent that this is a Buy.

like

This is one of my favorite couples from the show. While Steven was quite immature during the show, it seemed like he was just young and wanted to be a good dad. They've been together as a family for a while now, he has taken up yoga to manage his temper issues, she has a career on the side as a photographer and they seem happy. I hope their social media is a true representation of their lives and I hope they are truly happy together with their little son 😊

Post Photo
like

Okay, who here was smart enough to put in $80 limit buys?

like

When your also consulting boyfriend has to leave on Mondays.....

Post Photo
likefunnyuplifting

Paid off my account debt!

like

Thinking about buying a house in La Mirada and start a family soon. Any thoughts on La Mirada area?

like

More Posts

Anyone ever register an expensive car in Montana under a LLC to avoid taxes?

like

Anyone have advice on getting your foot in the door at Google or Meta for a Sales Role? I’ve only got 3.5 years of experience but have achieved Presidents Club and have had success at 2 “blue chip” organizations.

like

Phr vs waiting for sphr?
Taking the credential and want to prep.

Anyone listening to any Bachelor related podcasts? Anyone else annoyed with Kay from the Betchelor?

like

Anyone for Yosemite/Sequoia next weekend?

like

Looking for 2bhk/3bhk near marathahalli or Brooke field and a flatmate(preferably Telugu)as we are 3 pre decided and rent range is 20000-30000

like

How many cups of coffee do you drink per day?

Any idea about salary for Technology Analyst with 4.9 years of experience.
Technology stack - Java-all, MySql, Rest Api, VertX, Couchbase,RTF, Springboot and CICD

like
like

For a 3 Year Experienced React Developer shifting from Service based company which is better Comcast or Verizon? Pay wise 1.5 LPA is the difference between two companies. Designation is same. Both have variable pay upto 10%.

like

All of us want the same thing! Money- Flex Timing- Great Culture- Respect - Value in what we are doing!
We, the employees make an organization. If all of us want the same thing, how come the culture of that organization still remains the same! Why can’t we be the pioneer? Thoughts…

likeupliftingfunny

I have a client who needs a 401k, or a solo retirement account w loan options. When I was at UBS/Ameriprise, it was no issue but now it seems tougher to find a firm that does solo 401k as a RIA's.

likehelpful

Living in NJ and may be able to choose NYC as my home office. People who live in NJ can choose NJ / NYC office, which one did you choose?

NJ office: no NYC tax, don't have to file 2 state return. Live in NJ so auto assigned to NJ office currently.

NYC office: NYC tax on paycheck, easier commute, possibly higher pay?

likefunny

Hi Everyone,

Looking for Mobile or Web Automation testing openings in Kochi or Trivandrum.

Total Exp : 6.6yrs

Can someone help me on this

Thanks

like

Wednesday Wordle 326 3/6

⬜🟩🟩⬜⬜
🟨🟩🟩🟨⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

like

What's the avg comp for deals advisory director at PwC?

like

How many billable hours do people in prosecution tend to average each month? I’ve gone through waves of feeling like my billable hours requirement is reasonable to feeling like I’m drowning and can’t possibly do it for that long.

like

Is it mandatory to declare income tax in CGI.Otherwise they will cut extra tax?

like

Hi All, looking for referral for Plsql with 6 years experience. Please let me know if anyone can help

Anyone with a leased car move from NJ to other states? If yes, could you please help me understand the process to get sales tax refund from NJ? Thanks in advance!

like

Additional Posts in Confession

Rings of Power makes me appreciate Peter Jackson even more. Holy F this is a disaster for Amazon, even Hobbit movies are better than this

likefunny

happy taco 🌮 Tuesday, every1
hope ur week goin smooth like buttttteer n beanzzz
letz finish week strong 🙌

likefunny

where my canadians at? how strict is covid there? my friend is in toronto for work and the hotel found out he has covid. now they’re locking him in his room. is that legal? if so, what’s the protocol to break quarantine? hotel wouldn’t answer 🫠

likeuplifting

All of us want the same thing! Money- Flex Timing- Great Culture- Respect - Value in what we are doing!
We, the employees make an organization. If all of us want the same thing, how come the culture of that organization still remains the same! Why can’t we be the pioneer? Thoughts…

likeupliftingfunny

I want to join a fitness class but I have been going to gym always instead. Any reasons to convince to join fitness class?

like

Gents - What perfume/cologne brand do you wear?

like

I sometimes feel I don’t fit the typical consulting stereotype very well

like

My garage's Early Bird rate ($9 vs $17) ends at 8:00am. Hope this is a harbinger of an excellent Friday

Have a great day, everyone!

Post Photo
likefunny

Chris Stapleton might be a cool guy. Maybe he has some good music. But every time I hear him sing “drive on” during a Ram commercial I want to punch him in the face. Ram has overplayed that one.

like

Any fish in AZ wanna be friends? 🥺

like

Hypothetical Q: If a house has two half baths and three full baths, how are they counted? 4 Baths, or 3.5 baths +.5 baths?

like

Zanzibar vs Flimores. Which one is the best for a fun boys' night out in Toronto? Or any other recommendations?

like

Is it illegal to tell someone to get out of your car if your in a national park at night? What if the person made you feel unsafe and you wanted them out of your car, even though the location was a bit dangerous (ex Yellowstone, Smoky Mountains)?

funnylike

Why are sibling relationships so complicated? We live in the same city. 23M w 21M bro in same city. We’ve always clashed, got closer in 2016-2019, then in covid started fighting and not being close. 2021 summer we got into some bad fights where he said some hurtful things that made me kind of hold a grudge until our fight in September. 2022 we’ve gotten a lot closer and only minimally clashed but still even tho we share personal things sometimes and have more mutual respect, cont

like

Do you share details about raises/bonuses/other financial gains with friends or do you keep it to yourself? I have a few friends who will tell me everything from how much money they make to how much their husband spent on them for their bdays to how much their parents make?? To me that feels like bragging/being arrogant. It’s also the way they say it, feels very much like seeking validation to me.

like

Female here and I hate to say it! But whenever I’m pull to a new project I secretly hope I don’t get a female lead. 😞 I had some interesting experiences with women leads, which it does not apply to all women!, but I feel a bit hesitant and I feel is ptsd lol how can I overcome this mentality?! I’m pro women and equally etc etc but I often rather deal with a dude lead Bc we women are so hard on each other. Smh 🤦🏽‍♀️

likefunny

Why do people try to take credit for regular phrases?
Someone just said “I call it fluff”
Oh really, YOU call it that.
Why do people pull the “I call it …” card?!

like

I'm not sure what else I did other than being respectful and not giving flip at the same time but (4) mature ladies in my office flirt with me every chance they get. Some of my M colleagues are beginning to notice and giving the prod. I must confess it comes with some perks as I do appreciate how fast they process my requests/orders which a M colleague literally told me is biased. Recently one of them offered to bring me her cooked food and asked that I do the same..(Cont'd)

likefunny

A toxic co-worker tried to throw me under the bus to cover their mistake in a call with leadership 😢😢. I showed the proof of conversation the next moment without hesitation to everyone. Suddenly their tone changes and tries to divert the topic 😒😒. I am distraught 🙁🙁

likeupliftingfunny

Went to a funeral today, wife’s oldest friend 42 non smoker, non drinker, did yoga and was a vegetarian and probably the nicest person I have met… went back to the house husband wanted a drink opened a top shelf bottle cause why not? Sometimes the stuff we discuss here is so trivial but what I remembered today is open the good stuff, enjoy it with people you love and tell them you love them. Tomorrow is not guaranteed

likehelpfulsmart

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal