At what point does it not make sense to buy/ build a bigger home? My husband dislikes our house immensely (was his with former wife) and wants to move. Only owes $180k on it, we’ve been together 6 years and thus I’d rather just remodel. It’s the only thing we disagree about - moving or staying. He doesn’t want to invest one more cent in this house.

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Obviously too many unpleasant memories in the house for your husband, so time to buy a house that will only have memories of your marriage and 100% of both of your personalities and taste.

like

My $.02. If your spouse wants the new house then he should do the work and you both agree on the outcome. If he doesn’t do the work then stay where you are at. Don’t get a 30-year. Budget for a mortgage that ends when you both plan to retire.

Assuming "only owes 180K" means you have decent equity, you don't need to be strapped with a high new mortgage as when you sell the current house, you can put that profit into the new home. This would allow you to have a smaller mortgage, which you could also finance for 10 or 15 years.

Also, do you need a bigger house, or maybe something similar in size without the ex-wife's presence?

Personally, I wouldn't go with a fixer upper unless both of you are very committed to the hassle of living in and around a construction site for many months. IMO, the savings frequently isn't worth the aggravation.

like

I would definitely move. No amount of remodeling is going to take away his bad memories of what went on in that house. Do both of you a favor and start looking. Interest rates are crazy low right now.

likehelpful

Assuming you have filed jointly, pre-approval will only take you 20 minutes alone. Just do it. He can sign the docusign in less than 3 minutes.

If you buy a similar house you will be financing only 10% more assuming normal commissions and fees. If you have 15 years left on your mortgage, finance for 15 years, 10 years, finance for 10. Time to payoff doesn't have to change.

like

Sounds like you need to be an episode of “Love it or List It” 😊

funny

D1 - we could use a slightly larger house. We have 2 bedroom, 2 bath. One bedroom has become his office for wfh, and I have a small space set up in the basement./lower level by the laundry room.

And literally zero storage space so we rent a storage garage for a variety of seasonal items that we have no room to store.

Our kitchen is very small - can’t even fit a table/chairs in it, have to use stools at a counter/island.

All that aside, we are on 3 lovely wooded acres which I hate to give up.

Definitely need a bigger, more functional home. I suspect you will need to move since it will be quite an expensive and extensive remodel of the existing house.
I can relate to how nice acreage is, as I have 13 acres and not sure I could handle a smaller property.

I’m in the same boat but without the SO - hate my 2/2 house but love my area, only owe $120k now so sucking it up til it is paid off. But if your husband really hates it and with those ex-wife memories...I’d be doing a renovation or moving. Assuming you’re both still working, you can continue to generate income - but you won’t get back all the time your husband spends being unhappy.

Related Posts

Who wants to start a DAO and buy time shares (literally lmao) in a watch.

Can rotate throughout the year 😂

likeuplifting

Can I make rental agreement as paying rent to my dad for tax savings .. I would like to mention 46k per month as rent .. Please help .

likehelpful

Do you think you and your significant other should have similar personalities? My significant other and I are doing long distance and I feel like when I FaceTime with him, I emote more and show interest by asking more questions but from his end, he doesn’t always have a reaction or just nods, and it makes me feel like he’s uninterested. On his end he sees it as he’s comfortable.

like

My kids were really upset with me when I told them that my job as an engineer did not mean that I drove trains for a living

like

I had a crush on a girl. It's been almost 2 years since I confessed my feelings to her and today she told me that she likes me too.
The only issue is she's a Muslim and I'm a Hindu. She believes we don't have a future and that's why she took a long time to confess. She is confused on what to do and even I am confused because things will actually be difficult for obvious reasons.
Please advice on what we should do now.
Should we part ways or should we fight for it?

like

Hi ,
I have got sodexo card activated today. I found there is Meal Pass card, Meal benefit pass card and Cafeteria card

Which one we get money loaded ? Will that only usable in Bofa cafeteria!

like

Any loan facility available in BOA

like

Weird question alert: When did your daughters start “developing?” Noticing signs in my soon to be ten year old, which is a little concerning, as my sister has huge...tracks of land. Would rather my daughter didn’t have to deal with what I remember she had to. Anyone remember?

like

Any Amex employee here with an Amex card? Could you guide me on the process and eligibility of cards and what benefit do we get as employees?

like

Are we on recession? My portfolio is super down - low cost ETF investor here

like

Any suggested reading / books that one can use to learn options trading? Experienced investor, who wants to get into options.

like

It’s week 5 for me of the breakup and even though I had a full and fun weekend with friends and people I love, I woke up today so so sad because I wanted to text my ex. I just feel overall so defeated and exhausted from sadness and unmotivated at work :(

like

Recent college graduate - looking for advice and tips on how to buy stocks and trade.

like

I guess I'll try my luck out... Isn't the ideal thing to have the passion and romance of teenagers, but with the maturity and experience of adults? Hopefully I could find someone here that has that mindset.

likehelpful

I consolidated grad loans in ‘15, kept federal separate from private (w SoFi @6.75%). Can I refinance w SoFi or w Earnest? Should I combine the federal and lose the protections for better %?

ACN Peeps: What's the best BenefitHub deal?

like

If you found out a boss (or colleague) is cheating (gf/bf or spouse), does that make you lose respect for them even when it comes to their work/decisions?

like

Married to a crazy rich girlfriend and it's the worst experience of my life. She can afford anything, flying first class everywhere, wears all branded stuff and she doesnt have to work for life. I am working very hard to provide for family and I am still not able to add any value to her life and she's been distancing herself. We havent had any meaningful interaction in the past 1 year too, been sleeping separately, no touch/kiss/sex or anything like that. We might be divorcing soon...

like

Is it typical for in-house pharma roles to offer pensions?

helpful

More Posts

Hi all

Need 11 likes to active DM. Please help

Thank you

like

Any tips on making a small wedding feel intimate and special versus tiny and boring?

like

Guest list stress 😖😖 how many did y’all invite vs how many came?!

like

We’re having a destination wedding and I feel selfish/silly for taking a honeymoon after. But I feel like if we don’t do it then we will put it off and it won’t really feel like a “honeymoon”. What would you do?

like

Thoughts on kindly asking your bridesmaids to please not give a gift? I am over the moon excited that my bridesmaids will be celebrating me and traveling for the wedding and bachelorette. I really do not want a gift from them at the wedding. Full disclosure, my fiancé and I have great paying jobs and my bridesmaids are grad students, artists, and teachers. How would you frame this? Even if they were millionaires I would not want a gift, but I don’t want it taken the wrong way.

like

Looking for solid bridesmaid dress recommendations with a good color, design, and size range!

like

Could you please help in letting know whether EY India ( Client Microsoft) will provide work from home option EY

like

Scared to start clomid next week. I’ve already been so emotional just about starting this process overall!

like

Sometimes being a manager sucks. You have to powder butts both above and below you. #BabyAssociatesandBabyPartners

like
like

Hi. I got selected as a consultant in Global business services role (SA&MA) in DI. Can someone throw some light on this practice as what it does? Will the clients be India based or overseas?

like

Guys after how many days project calls are received?

Tips/Nuggets for switching departments within an agency.

like

I got offer for NielsenIQ for Pune location. Want to know about WLB and how the variable salary is getting paid .

like

I have 7+ years of experience, how much salary offer I should expect from TechM.

Thoughts on the Technology Strategy and Advisory group? What sort of projects / roles would a consultant take on? Wlb?

Anyone know what kind of snake? Spotted in northern va

Post Photo
like

Hi team,

I left wipro and joined new company a month before. In new company's form 11 ita asking whether you have been part of epf and eps in last organization?
Epf i am sure i need to give yes. But what do i need to give for Eps? I am aware that wipro contributed 8.33% of pf to eps. Can i transfer that too?

like

Relocating to SF and office will be in downtown. Does Foster City sound like a good option to live? Maybe need to commute only a day or two to office. Thanks!

like

I am looking for a referral in marketing /operations role in flipkart at Bangalore location.

Anyone please out here who can hive referral

Additional Posts in Over 50 in Consulting

I'm so tired of working. I just want to buy a little place in the country and live a simple life.

like

Where do you over 50 ladies shop for work clothes? Need a bit if a wardrobe refresh and looking for ideas.

I’m think only we can appreciate this thought.

Post Photo
like

Any one considered doing part time Consulting engagements via Services like MBO, Catalent GLG etc. Seems like a good way to stay in the game earn some extra income but do it on an Ad hock basis.

like

Don’t think if my self as depressed, but definitely struggling to give a sh!t recently. Covid, WFH and the craziness of the political drama is definitely a factor, but can’t help but think age and career point is more so - struggling to get excited after 30+ years of the grind.
Looking for suggestions

like

Gotta say I LOL’d at this.

Post Photo
funnylike

Any thoughts on the put down, “Ok, Boomer”
??

helpful

What do you suggest people under 30 do to put a stop to ageism?

like

So my brother doesn't talk to me for 6 months.   (I had offered my lake house guest space to my cousin who said yes instead of my brother who didn't know if he could come nor when he might know if he could come, how unfair of me).

On Thanksgiving day mom arrives and tells me that brother might come by in an hour.  He had ignored my invite weeks ago.  (Uh ok, sure).

Continued...

like

Has anyone here ever tried negotiating “at will” employment terms in the US? I’m curious what specific terms folks have asked for and how the potential employer reacted.

like

I’m 51 and a consultant. Am I too old to be this level. Starting to feel like it.

like

Does anybody have any experience getting a Grandpad or Jitterbug (or similar) for an elderly relative who is not local to you? My Dad is reluctant to carry a cell phone and never uses the flip phone I got him 10 years ago but maybe if it was more basic /easier to use he would (?) I told him if he goes out walking he should be carrying one. He has a history of falling a few times a year and I want him to be able to call 911 if he needs to. I’m a plane ride away. He lives by himself. He refuses

like

What is the best exit from consulting if you are the breadwinner and your spouse has medical issues? I feel trapped by medical insurance requirements.

likehelpful

Is anyone changing their retirement plans based on COVID-19 realities and the future of work.

like

Do big4s have any history of offering early retirement packages?

Who remembers this?

Post Photo
likefunny

Has anyone here been able to recover from career setbacks caused by Dot Com, 9-11, or Great Recession economy? Just turned 40 with 15 years of relevant industry experience, and my Big 4 employer brought me in at a level designed for 25 year-olds. Career progression is apparently based on time in role rather than performance, so I’ll have to spend 8 years climbing back to the level I was at pre-recession. Is there another way, or is my career stuck in neutral?

like

I just realised that all the women over 50 in my practice have been "counseled out" (including me) or put on a PIP this year.

likesmart

I’m 52M and looking at divorce with a kid heading to college and one still high school. I agreed to pay for both kids’ college and live a like a pauper for the next 7 years. Any advice?

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal