God forbid you are forced to choose between love and family (family not approving), your pick?

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Depends on the situation. Families, especially those Muslim/Middle Eastern/Brown families can be extremely unreasonable and selfish when it comes to relationships. Have seen maybe 20+ relationships amongst my friends fail mainly because the Muslim parents weren't accepting of the 'boyfriend or girlfriend' (even when the boyfriend of girlfriend was also Muslim/Brown)...in my opinion that's not fair and this isn't the backwards society like it is in Pakistan or India, so if parents push back, the kids need to push back harder and ignore them

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Depends. If the person is actually a good genuine person and family isn't accepting because of race, religion, culture then LOVE. You will live with that person forever, you don't live with fam forever. But, if family is providing sound advice based on warning signs they see in character then Fam all the way!

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Seems like a case of brown parents lol

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Depends on reasoning. If it's superficial reason like she's not good looking or rich enough then fuck that but if it's legit like she's not a good person then think about it

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Family will always come around

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Family always

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Family always. Unless your family blows

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Family always. No one can ever love you as much as your mom.

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If family is truly an "unbreakable bond" you should never have to choose. Parents who threaten to disown children over who they marry do not truly love their children

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The only reason my fam wouldn't approve is if the person I was dating was a bad person and I couldn't see it for whatever reason. So family definitely. That being said, I know not everyone has such a family

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I don't have that type of family that supports choices that don't serve them well and loves unconditionally, so I'd choose love. The RIGHT love. 😉

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Always family. If your boss is asking you to stay late despite you having kids and a wife waiting at home for some evening recreation, you tell that boss to fuck off. Family is key. All the MDs that work late on Friday's have no rings on their fingers. It's like "wow you're a partner at your firm, but you go home and bake a frozen lasagna for one." I think you win (assuming yo have an awesome family). Fuck all the people that put work over family. They don't get it

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Who's opinion of your life choices is more important, you as the person living them, or your family? Do you want to maintain relationships developed not by choice but by biological necessity where you must abandon personal fulfillment to achieve harmony?

In case my answer isn't clear, I say "fuck that". If this other person is not harming you (which they would need to make clear), then they need to exhibit their love for you by not just tolerating your choice but enthusiastically supporting it. If they can't bring themselves to do it, they only love you so far as you fit the mold of their expectations which may or may not align with your personal views. To which I again say "fuck that".

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Surprised your siblings are less understanding OP

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Not comfortable providing details but love the support guys :) it just feels like a lose lose situation right now, going after love makes me guilty of deceiving the people who gave me the silver spoon and losing the love is starting to feel impossible. I don't think there is a way to come out as a winner here hahha. 🍻

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hm I feel like if this applied to race or class SO for sure. But I'm curious say if someone is bi and family disapproves of same sex partner what people would say. I'd say if it's truly that special person then SO and again family would hopefully come around

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You sure this isn't a brown parent thing? Sorry I'm being ignorant here... just based on other friends experiences.

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If it's true love, love. Family does, will fall in love with their own loves, live their own lives while you are unhappy. Sucks but pick your. They will come around. And if not, oh well.

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A4, if you were gay, and your family was anti-gay, that model breaks down. Your emotional attachment to a person should be the biggest criteria in starting YOUR family, then mutual understanding (as needed) to bring that person in to the larger family unit is needed. Saying they must fit in to the existing family structure and norms is ceding all personal autonomy in living your life the way you'd choose.

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Love

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