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I feel you, I’m also currently in a job that requires an extra effort. I change the activity, go for a walk, play a video game, etc. But also I don’t talk much outside of work during weekdays, and have some alone time, as it’s already a lot.
3pm fatigue is real.
My friend Rachel Lowenstein has some good tiktok content about being autistic and working in an agency (rachelissan on tiktok). I think if I were to summarize, it’s about advocating for what you need— blocking/batching meetings, asking for agendas in advance, feeling empowered to opt out of the networking event in favor of a small dinner. Much of what she suggests is just good communications in the workplace even if you aren’t a neurospicy individual
I end up having to have a ton of down time immediately after sign off. Like lock myself in a quiet space, bubble bath and music down time. I have also taken up the art of bread baking, which is relaxing for me and a bit of an outlet.
How old are you? And are you a woman?
Because once perimenopause hit it all changed for me. I was undiagnosed and uninformed and didn’t realize it was the effort of masking combined with hormonal changes that contributed to the intense struggle and ensuing burnout. From my research a lot of women don’t get diagnosed until peri because suddenly we can’t “do life” anymore. Meaning we can’t mask anymore. Something really goes down and many of us just say “fuck all this”. You’re lucky to have awareness of your neurospiciness - there’s so much I wish I’d known sooner. Also, HRT is not a cure-all but it has helped me immensely.
Mentor
I have ADHD. This won’t fix things entirely but budge things in the right direction: try to be as offline/analog/asynchronous as possible. What does this look like?
- ask colleagues if you can make some/all internal meetings camera off (or ideally phone calls)
- for casual internal 1:1’s do a phone call + walk outside
- for some colleagues I’ve gotten in in the habit of exchanging voice notes over iMessage. Saves a ton of time wordsmithing emails or slack messages plus the audio recording is there to reference back to
- at minimum, hide your “self-view” on Zoom. You’d be shocked how much energy is zapped from subconsciously glancing at your own camera feed