Related Posts
Remote - Zapier - Accountant - Entry Level
Hi fishes how is wlb in mphasis?
Are you currently looking for a new position? If so we have a Project Manager position that we are looking to fill. I have included the link to our website so you can review the job description. This position can be remote, but the candidate must understand that there is 80% travel for this position. Please let me know if you are interested in learning more about the opportunity.
https://www.hartintercivic.com/jobs/project-manager/
Kendra McCoy, Recruiter at Hart InterCivic
More Posts
Additional Posts in The Worklife Bowl
Can’t focus today
Is roomba s9+ worth it?
Anyone else worried about their office plants?
How do you balance work and fun?
Short weeks are the best!
This doesn't sound right to me

...First date ideas during a pandemic?
New to Fishbowl?
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.





I’ve been down this path. I think who works in the family is a financial decision.
However, before you ask your husband to quit his job, I recommend that you fully assess what kind of a stay at home dad he will be. Your visions of home preschool, healthy meals, and daily trips to the park don’t necessarily come true just because your husband is no longer working. With a nanny, you can control what is happening by dictating the schedule. When your husband stays at home, the kids are his job and he is the decision maker.
Enthusiast
Very good point but not an issue in our case. He is very engaged and patient, is a great cook and has a background in early childhood education (ended up going a different route in life but is very good with kids). Our children adore spending time with him and have way more fun with him than with me.
You need to have a business discussion with him 200K vs 80K means I do not think he has much of a leg to stand on when it comes to making significant family decisions that impact you, your health, etc.
You should totally look into getting a nanny. Find one that speaks a foreign language that is useful Spanish Portuguese French or whatever. Your kids will get exposed to another language another culture and you will get some of your sanity back.
Also just make sure that she is not particularly attractive. As my buddy’s wife says, that is setting yourself up for failure hence why they have had a succession of young super kind super great but overweight Brazilian girls helping to raise their kids. 
Their screening process was literally a stack of nanny dossiers where she asked him is she hot? The hot ones went into one pile the ones who are not hot went into the other. Then the hot pile went into the trash.
Just tell him you want a “Manny” named Paulo from Brazil....
Enthusiast
With them in a way they need. I make more than double his income (200k vs 80k) and we can’t live on his income alone. Sending them back to daycare is not an option and he refuses to get a nanny because he doesn’t trust some “random person”. What do I do??
Chief
Have you laid this out for him? That you cannot do it, and that he will not let you hire someone to do it, so he has to do it? It’s pretty clear: nanny or him. Let him choose but say it can’t be you or you’ll get fired and you can’t live off his salary. Just the facts. Let him decide. But absolutely stop doing it yourself. Leave the house for a long drive if you have to.
Enthusiast
Don’t have any advice for you but more power to you! We have a two and one year old but wife is stay at home I honestly wouldn’t be able to do what you’re doing.
Enthusiast
Yea we’re in a rough spot in terms of our kids ages. It’s a struggle on my end as well. I work on average 12-14hr a day (management consulting) and struggle just to help my wife (she needs a break too) I feel like I’m on paternity leave but with work.
Do you work more hours in a day? Regardless I’d say no you’re not being unreasonable.
I would be too. There’s no reason that the division of labor should be that one sided. He needs to step up or figure out a solution where he can give more of his time to parenting the kids. Good luck!
Enthusiast
I don’t understand why it would be an issue, it’s a discussion worth having at least.