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I’m 26 weeks pregnant and trying to figure out my leave. I live in NJ and work at PwC, any fishes know the policy for NJ and PwC? The leave center has not been much help and I want to plan NOW not like 60 days before. I was told NJ gets two weeks before due date and PwC gives you two weeks as well.
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You’ll never be ready. You just do it and your instincts kick in on their own. Trust me you will figure it out!!
Thinking a bit more on this: a flexible work place has been a huge stress reliever when trying to balance work and home life. If you work somewhere that frowns upon you leaving early or working from home occasionally, find a new gig that’s more parent friendly. Ask other parents in your current office, how flexible is it really?
Save money and save all of your PTO when you find out you're pregnant so you can have an extra long maternity leave. Declutter your house because it's unbelievable how much stuff a tiny human being needs/amasses.
The cost of daycare. It's 2000 a month where I am. It's a cost we never really thought about until we had to start paying it.
You just decide an play by ear. There is no other way to prepare yourself other than having a job. It’s a crazy amazing beautiful ride
Get on as many daycare wait lists as you can IMMEDIATELY. We were on 7 wait lists and only got into one.
Buy used stuff (clothes, swing, pack n play, etc). It costs a shit ton new and they use it for such a short period of time. Daycare is no joke. Start looking and doing your research ASAP. A kid is a great time to reset expectations at work. Don’t ever apologize for being a parent.
Had my first when I was 27, have three now. If you thought late nights at the office were tough, you ain’t seen nothing yet.
That’s sad @SAD.
I had my son when I was 20, and I’ve been doing it by myself the whole time. It hasn’t been easy and I lived near family while I was “launching” my career, but it’s possible even in the most “unready” of circumstances. You might feel broke around the holidays, you might wish you could pay off your debt a little faster, and you may have to give up a few things, but it’s totally worth it. You and your partner will be A-OK. Trust me.
Just echoing the others... you'll never be ready, once they are born you'll be ready.
Our great grand parents had our grand parents without 90% of what's available today. It's scary as shit, I know, but once it happens... you'll be fine! Good luck!
I think when people say “you’ll never be ready” another way to think about it is “you’re as ready as you’ll ever be”. I was older when I had my kids and I never felt ready or fully prepared. Especially working in account management where I plan and budget and execute everything, having a baby was one of those things that is unpredictably beautiful. It really stretched me as a human emotionally, physically, financially, professionally. And above all, it filled my life. But you look around you and every human went through this - and not everyone was “ready”. As you can see from this thread no one really was. That’s the beauty of it. If you want it, do it. It will be the best thing you’d ever done. My kids fill my heart to the brim and beyond. And that makes the journey very worth it
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It’s true, you’ll never think you are ready, you’ll never have enough money, it’ll never be the right time or the right circumstances. But you’ll figure it out, everything will be ok, and it’ll be one of your greatest accomplishments.
Thanks! Just thinking things like pay off debt to a certain point, save to some extent, get to a certain point in your career etc. before you felt ‘ready’? Even know I know you’re never going to be ready.
Thanks!
OP, we had some money saved for "kid stuff"... you don't realize how fast they go through diapers and all the other (unnecessary, but too cute not to buy). As for our debts, I don't think we changed anything pre/post kids, we continue to pay it off as usual.
You’ll never be ready, never have enough money, never get your life back, never have peace of mind, never have a moment for yourself again. Never do it.
ACD1, which area are you from?? 2K daycare? I thought we had it bad here...1-1.5K LA/OC area
Somebody here has their kid in daycare in NYC? How much do you pay? Where we are is around 1600$ average for montessori programs, we want to move to NYC so I’m curious
Daycare in New York around 2500 month for full time care.