How do you give feedback to your manager that no one’s ever made you feel as stupid as they do..? (Without limiting your career)

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Frame it around respect. “As we’re both colleagues, I expect mutual respect at the end of the day. When you said/did xyz, I felt xyz which didn’t translate to a respectful workplace environment. If there’s specific feedback on my work, I welcome constructive insights but would like to be treated as a valued colleague when doing so.”

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I do not think this conversation should be limiting at all...i guess if you had a truly terrible manager, there could be retaliation, but that is very very against policy. I'd start here and see if the frankness makes a difference or at least elicits an apology

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When you do ____, it makes me feel _______

Frame around how it makes you feel/impact on you

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Is there a process for anonymous feedback at your firm? When I have felt the need to give negative upward feedback, I typically do it when I can do so anonymously only

How are they making you feel stupid?

I quit my last job because of this very reason. When I gave my notice, my manager was shocked and asked why when I had made such an incredible progress with a department she thought could never change or progress, etc. then asked me to reconsider. I was so done taking her verbal insults for an entire year and this weight was lifted off me when I finally left.

Literally just tell and give examples if they can’t deal w it they shouldn’t manage.

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