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I have found that some parents treat IEP and 504 meetings like personal counseling sessions. Many of these students and parents need counseling and additional resources that happen outside of school. They don't seem to understand that we can't be there to find the answer to every issue, even when it's disability related.
Did you tell the parent that? Make sure they know what is possible and what isn't. Detach emotionally from this part of the job. A lot of parents know that their disabled children are more vulnerable and susceptible to the playground/lunch drama than others. I think it's often a reaction of guilt because some parents made the choice to indulge in things/not take care of their health that may have contributed to their child's issues. You do not have a magic wand to make everything alright for these people, and at the end of the day it's a job. They need to understand that but whether they do or not, make sure YOU do.
There needs to be better communication between schools, care providers, and families about what each party’s role is and where the responsibilities lie. Schools are responsible for providing supports related to children’s education and learning. Parents need to be educated about resources and access to supports for medial issues and emotional issues outside of school. Schools cannot be the only source of support for students and parents need to understand this. Many seem to think that their child is the only one with needs. They have unrealistic expectations about what can and should be done at school. I am a special education teacher and case manager. (We do both here for our own caseloads). I also have a son who needed special education services in the early years for OT, PT, and Speech. When he was in second grade, he still had a speech production disorder, but it was not impacting him academically or educationally, and he was discontinued from having an IEP for school based services. I was told that he had a medical issue now, not an educational one, and therefore the school was no longer responsible for services. I was encouraged to seek outside speech therapy for my child and go through my pediatrician and insurance company for services. It is my job as his parent to take responsibility and action. I agreed with this whole heartedly and respected where they were coming from. I wish that the school I worked at would hold some if our families accountable in this way and stop expecting schools to “fix” their kids.
Why wouldn't you? Aren't you raising that child? LOL!