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What is the culture like, type of work and reputation of Capco in the Data & Analytics space?
I have some good ex colleagues who moved over there and also looked up on LinkedIn and see lots of seemingly smart and accomplished people in their D&A team in the UK.
I'll ask my ex colleagues too, but wanted to see if people here have any opinion or information on this too.
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Is there a polite way to ask someone what their ethnicity is? Obviously the “where are you reeeally from” is rude but I also don’t think that people who ask that question mean it in a malicious way typically. Is the topic of culture/ethnicity just off limits at work? I ask all this as a white guy who grew up around a lot of Asian and Indian people and was fortunate to be exposed to a lot of different cultures.
A] India is in Asia. Indians are Asians too
B] No. Do white people get asked that?
“What is your ethnicity?” is how I like to be asked.
-second gen Asian American.
I get tired of saying I'm from Oregon, Boston, and Maryland... I now say, "born & raised in Seoul, Korea." I also never refer myself as a Korean-American anymore, too long, once over 40 years old I just don't give a shit anymore.
I once asked where someone of a different ethnicity was from because of their accent.
Not because they sounded foreign, but because they sounded like they were from the same area I grew up. (They were!)
But I realized how it must have first came off!
As an Asian immigrant that gets asked this, I try to see the good intent behind these questions and say, I was born in (country) and my parents decided to move and I grew up (here, here, and here).
I married into a family of European immigrants and they often share, with pride and without any question, their heritage.
So, I try to remember this is just a point for us all to connect and to be proud of our own history.
I appreciate it when people ask me where I’m from. Anyone I meet probably knows my ethnicity but doesn't want to assume where I was born. That’s a good thing!
I used to get offended by the “where are you realllllly from” questions. So now I make it easy for everyone and respond with, “I currently live in (insert city), but I’m originally from India.” It puts everyone at ease!
The question I hate more than anything is, “oh, how come your English is so good?!” I rarely have a good reaction to that one!
I think I would still follow the same principal! I would just say originally from whichever American city , or " (city) born and raised
" or something like that.
This thread makes me wanna ask a bunch of white people where they're REALLY from just for fun 😂😂
I don’t think too much about it as an immigrant. Grew up somewhere else, I say it when asked. I don’t know why assuming I’m from elsewhere is offensive if I have a physical characteristic that suggests I might be. Whatever.
It's not that asking the question or being curious about it is wrong, I think it's that they weren't happy/interested with the first answer and would rather keep digging for an answer that makes sense to them. It shows an ignorance of diverse/multicultural backgrounds and the senior doesn't try to ask more respectfully or show genuine interest the second time around. It seems like this person assumed the Asian person was from "somewhere else" when they asked and when the answer didn't seem to fit that assumption, they keep looking for an answer that fits their preconceived ideas rather than actually respecting this person's identity and origin. The intent seems pretty clear in the way in which the question was asked twice.
I usually respond “[city]” and if they ask “where are you really from”, I respond with a nice email to their superior and HR
I prefer to go with now "what's your background?" It doesn't sound as rough as "ethnicity" and it allows people to give a general story of themselves
Yikes 😳
Planet earth 🌏 you?
Not cool
I say “If I tell you, you might not really know where”. 😆 phrasing depends on how annoyed I am.
I’m a new immigrant (moved as an adult). This was one of the things I heard about and was like oooo I AM READY FOR THIS since I’m actually a foreigner! What I was NOT ready for was the following:
Them: “Where are you from?”
Me: “Non-US Country X”
Them: “But like… where did you grow up … in America??”
Me: “I’m… I’m not American??”
This happens weirdly frequently and baffles me. I’ve even had people suggest areas in the US that I grew up in where I guess there’s a heavy concentration of people with my ethnicity??
I have people tell me ' oh but you speak such good English' inside I am like duh thanks to the Britah colonizing the world I can't speak my own language properly
Perhaps they are trying to be nice. But Asians are conditioned to ask questions from their young age. For instance Asian moms ask tons of questions to their kids returning from school and to their friends visiting home etc etc
It could be, the way she mad it sound, yeah some sounded like they where being friendly, though others sounded a bit sketchy and gave her a feeling they where trying to take advantage of her based on where she was from.
This is a teachable moment that you can leverage to reduce the amount of ignorance in that question.
1. I grew up in Dallas and identify as a Texan.
Where are you really from?
2. I was born in New York before I moved to Texas
No, where you are reallllly from?
3. Oh, if you're asking where my family originates from, my parents grew up in Hong Kong and immigrated to the states back in the early 70's. So, senior manager, where are you reallly from? :)
I give people the benefit of the doubt, as they typically don't realize their ignorance shines through their mode of questioning. Replying with snarky remarks does not build any good will and can further alienate you.
Good thing you are so patient.
Just because you're "curious" or you "find it interesting" does not mean it is relevant to or appropriate for the workplace. It reads as thinly veiled racism, regardless of intent. Let someone offer personal details about themselves as they are comfortable, and in the meantime accept the reality that's it's really none of your business.
Just say “what’s your ethnic background? I’m curious” - also maybe consider having this as a 1:1 convo instead of putting the person on the spot in a meeting.
Sure, for ME it’s ok. I’m a POC. If I’m having a 1:1 conversation like a coffee chat or something, I really think “what’s your ethnic background if you don’t mind me asking?” Is ok. I would also say no if I didn’t want to answer. It’s way better than “where are you from?” Or “where are you REALLLLLY from?” I wasn’t born here. So that’s still my actual lived heritage I’d be telling them about. I can imagine someone whose family’s been here for generations may feel different. BIPOC are not a monolith when it comes to our comfort.
I’m an immigrant born in another country and raised in an American city. I usually just say “I was born in X but I grew up in Y.”
If I want to know (I usually do bc I like to connect w fellow immigrants), I ask AFTER I divulge my background so the other party knows they’re talking to a friendly party, and then my question is “what is your heritage?”
That way the other person can divulge as much as they feel comfortable, and it sounds more interested (I want to know more about your culture / background) than interrogative (“well you don’t LOOK like you’re from Iowa…”)
Also I would add that I only go down that path if it’s reasonable to think their family came to America relatively recently so we can connect on the immigrant experience. I don’t usually ask white Americans or black Americans
I was just in a D&I workshop where we discussed saying 'what's your ethnicity?' or 'where did your grandparents grow up?' instead.
I'm an expat working with expats, and I still don't think that's ok. What do you'll think?
I’m adopted, so it doesn’t matter how far up the family tree the question goes. My answer is somewhere along the East coast of the US.
It’s a judgment call- some people are just trying to break the ice or be nice, and others are just being rude.
Always good to call it out.
"I am not going to answer that now. Lets talk later and we can both share our personal backgrounds and experiences"
I can facepalm only so many times here, folks.