I’m at the point that I start trembling every time I get an email alert. It’s the little things piling up that is getting to me. The to do list full of, “send emails to X about Y,” “follow-up re this,” “revise the 100 small things the baby lawyer drafted.” Tasks that might take 15 minutes to an hour individually, but all together it’s a lot. I’m the bottle neck. I’m the one who needs to move these things along. But there’s always something bigger and more urgent. Nothing’s ever FINISHED.

Gift ideas for my childhood baby sitter's granddaughter..She graduated with an Engg degree last year during Covid and just finally landed a job with Reliance.. She's the first engineer in the family and I'm so proud of her.. I want to send her something from Amazon but can't really think of a good gift.. Any suggestions?

How practical is living as a single parent in Europe (scotland/Norway)?

If LinkedIn and Reddit had a child, Fishbowl would be it. Or at least that’s my first impression…Hello All!

Hi folks, need your help! Just found out that we’re pregnant (we were not actively trying so kinda surprised 🙈). What brand prenatal vitamins would you recommend? I’m seeing mixed suggestions on Folic vs. Folate - which one is important?

Please guide me and let me know if there is anything else I need to do at this moment. I’ve contacted my OB as well. I’m so worried. Thanks!

Has anyone attempted lab “kits”? A small set of materials you send home with a kid to do a lab at home?

We were not trying to conceive. And I was drinking alcohol like twice a week.
Now I missed my period and pregnant. I am panicking a lot, not sure if I want a baby right now. Definitely i cant deal with pregnancy constantly knowing how much u drinking could have affected the fetus and if i could ever endure the consequences it would bring upon the baby
Help me understand if my baby will be fine or not.

Last night I went over to my friends house (she has 2 kids, 2 and 4 yo). She and her husband were asking me about my pregnancy and planning. And were asking what I’ve prepped to date. I’m only 13w2 days so I think it’s way to early for buying stuff, but I did mention we hired a baby nurse for when the baby comes. My friend completely berated me, short of calling me a bad mom already, saying “what is she going to do all day? Don’t you want to bond with your child?”. I’m so upset by this.

I work in a self contained classroom. A parent of one of my kids wants to come and volunteer after learning all my staff quit. Can I allow her to do this? Admin has no idea and I'm not sure with FERPA laws.. advice, suggestions? What can I have her do if she can come?

What big 4 have the best maturity and paternity leave policies?

I know everyone will have different answers for this but how did you know it was time to get sober? I think it might be time for me to find a new job and pursue sobriety, but I don't feel like I'm a rock bottom which is the only time I've ever seen people really commit to it (my father). Apathy isn't the right word but I just kind of feel numb about everything and I think being sober would maybe help.

I have a business background and a year ago, after I enrolled in a major European business school blockchain specialization, I decided to start focusing my career on this technology

I would like to continue going up on my learning curve while helping businesses adopt blockchain

Any career advice based on your experience? Best companies in the industry?

Thinking of getting a Black Baby Alive doll for my daughter. Preferably one that talks and moves, but there seems to be so many. Any suggestions?

My colleague is going on maternity leave for 4 months and I was asked to cover some of her projects which are step up in responsibility than what I’m currently operating at. Some peers have suggested I ask for a raise to accommodate this but I’m not sure I agree as I’m only covering her while she’s out? What are others thoughts about this?

Someone please tell me that I can get a rear facing child seat in the back of a mustang… otherwise it looks like I’ll have to buy a new family car to drive the little one around (wife doesn’t drive unfortunately).

Could be a good excuse to get a Taycan but was hoping I could just stick with my mustang. We said next car will be an EV didn’t think it would be so soon though!

I just started a new job 2 months ago, benefits and PTO don’t start until 90 days in so I still have a month before I can take off any time, and today found out my company doesn’t offer paid maternity leave.
I’m really struggling handling the symptoms and maintaining my full time job. Thinking about looking for a part time job to have more time to myself through the pregnancy since I won’t be getting a paid leave anyways, but lost on where to start looking. Any recommendations?

I work as of counsel at a small firm directly with 1 other attorney. I have worked w/ the other attorney for the last 10 years. How much paid maternity leave is reasonable to request?

26 y/o JD, CPA, CFP --- what are my odds landing a career with the FBI?

Hi there, can anyone give me the salary range for SM / Director at EY Canada? And if there a director role available at the firm?

For anyone in this bowl. How crucial is it for you to have a formal dining room separated from the kitchen? My son and daughter-in-law are buying a house for their future family and I'm trying to convince them a formal dining room looks better and makes things less chaotic in the kitchen, especially with kids. Am I out of touch? Or is it still important?

Hey fishes,

Does EY provide relocation expenses for moving inside same city? From one end to another end? To shift home in other area?

Anyone succumb to the ads and try Il Makiage make up? Foundation/concealer. Their brilliant ads make me curious, but not sure why not seeing it at Sephora is getting in my way. (while I’m at, how about that Thrive mascara that is everywhere)?

If anyone has insight on the compensation structure for the Managing Director/ Country CEO role I would appreciate insight on how package are structured and how best to determine the amount. Context is for a cloud tech consulting firm that is about 75M in revenue and 500 people and growing 10x on a 3 year intervals.

Hi Fishes,

I'm working in Wipro last year on 25/11/2021.. i have joined Wipro as fresher TRB band but still i didn't received any hike and band progression till now... I have not joined through campus placement... Please guide me when I'll be eligible for hike ...

SAFe SPC certified. 5 years of agile project, program management and release train engineer experience. Anyone looking to hire? Not a fan of PwC. Leaders in my area are frustratingly uninspiring.

Hello people of San Diego! Would love to hear how y’all are affording to live here comfortably. Please state your company, position, TC, YOE, and do you have a side hustle? I’ll start - I’m an advisor in Wealth Management with TC of $70k, 3 YOE and no side hustle. Among other things, rent just jumped from $2500 to $3700 for 2 bedroom and areas were looking at. I’d like to “make it” here but if it means switching career to make money I’d like to get an idea to make the right job change.

Men’s belt that goes well with jeans. Any suggestions ? Pictures also welcome

Since it was covered by SNL yesterday, I’m looking for suggestions that can make me feel better in the absence WH press briefing. Any suggestions please

Which advisory group has the least travel out of AAS, FDD/TAS, and risk advisory? Or is it all dependent on the client and team nowadays? And is the travel schedule comparable to consulting? (ex. M-Th on a plane)

What are your thoughts about OMSCS course by Georgia Tech?

Any trans in this bowl from India ?

Would would a senior product manager do over and beyond a product manager. We don’t have any seniors at my startup and I’m trying to figure out what I need to do/achieve to get promoted. Any advice would be much appreciated.

I am a direct private lender. I offer fast and reliable loan at 5% interest rate with no prepayment penalty. I can close a deal within 3-7 working days.

Do you have any project/deals that needs 100% funding?

-Jeremy

Choose to be happy today

Guilt and shame about working in a legal position for years where, instead of using my law degree (was supposed to do legal work per the job posting), I served as a personal assistant to my boss/did nothing for maybe half the time. I feel like I was paid for work I didn't do. I've since left that job but the guilt and shame remains. I feel that I lack the character of a lawyer and that I am unworthy of the profession. I don't know how to make up for the lost years or how to forgive myself.

Most/Least stressful areas of practice (in either transition or litigation)

When covid first hit, I was delighted to be working from home. My hours even improved. Now, because of some triggering events, I’m dealing with horrible panic attacks on the daily. I’m dissociating and can’t focus long enough to get work done. I JUST hit a year at this firm and am going on a one month stress leave. Worried I might not kick this mental state in that time. Any advice as to what I can do while on leave so I can come back focused and ready to work?

Is anyone else experiencing a new wave of covid anxiety due to the stress of figuring out the holidays? Got in an argument with a family member about safety guidelines and testing needing to happen and I’ve been feeling paralyzed by anxiety all day.

If you’re reading this, go drink some water!

People with depression in big law- how do you manage? How do you meet your hours? The lack of support/training and being remote has been very hard on me.

Mental health issues in our profession are finally being recognized. While mental health issues are not unique to lawyers, the profession and it's client service mantra present unique challenges.

What did y’all actually want to be when you grew up?

What about legal work is currently causing your mental health struggles?

Mine’s the hours, which is not normally my issue. I billed 230 for June and July and am already at 145 for August. My ability to focus is getting worse by the day, so I’m working longer to bill the same hours and have had to pull a couple all nighters. I burst into tears this morning when a client changed plans and now wants a major project by end of month, on top of my other deadlines next week... I just want to sleep.

I’ve had a really tense, emotionally exhausting week. Things wrapped up yesterday and now my body feels so strung out and exhausted. Any tips for coming down from being so strung out without relying on toxic habits and just shutting down/procrastinating? (My brain is saying “go for a run” and my body is getting stuck picking at my eyebrows for two hours) I feel like my central nervous system is on a roller coaster.

Anyone here willing to share their firsthand experience of searching for and selecting a therapist? My wife was kind enough to vet a few through our church and her friends, but wondering if I might find a better fit with a therapist who specializes in working with lawyers or small business owners.

question of the day: why did you join this bowl? Since I asked, I will start: I’ve been on a journey of recovery from legal-overachiever-workaholism. Changed jobs, city and environment and still working hard to recover from burnout that is, unfortunately, part and parcel of the legal profession.

SEEKING OPINIONS & FEEDBACK: I love the honest & practical discussions here, where people can freely identify things that are going on & seek guidance.

Wondering whether anybody’d be interested in some kind of more purposeful community- i.e., gathering w/fellow lawyers to pursue some specific mental health & well-being goals? We’d provide some counseling/coaching type content, in bite sized chunks, but have regular discussions to connect & encourage one another on applying the content IRL.

Gripe- there is no room for a sick day in this profession. Big closing coming up. Have a bad cold. Have billed 40+ hours in the last 3 days.

Why do lawyers celebrate a culture of poor health?

I’ve been working to an unhealthy degree lately. And I’ve been making the excuse that I have a lot of work right now, but I’m starting to wonder if I’m addicted to it. Part of it is anxiety and perfectionism. But my behavior is now actively harmful to myself and starting to harm my marriage.

How do I stop? I’m not talking work-life balance. I mean, how do I say, “I don’t care that the client wants this tomorrow and I’m not close to done, I’m going to sleep tonight”?

Has anyone had good experiences taking ashwagandha for daily stress?

I have chronic health issues and I’m severely depressed. I can’t even get myself to work anymore. If I don’t quit, I’m in serious danger of being fired. I feel that I need to just quit and take time off to get better but feel that it will be a stain on my career. I’m a pretty junior lawyer. Any advice. I just can’t do any work at all and I’m my anxiety and depression is spiraling out of control. I see a therapist I try to cope and it’s not working.

Anyone participating in dry January or done similar things in the past? Did you notice an effect on mental health or other benefits?