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Rising Star
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Pro
Conversation Starter
Any ivf centers in houston that you recommend ?
I mean by that same logic, aren’t you playing god by doing ivf to begin with?
Sure ok
We did have gender preferences, but ultimately we wanted to maximize our chances of even having a baby to begin with, so we just went with best grade embryo.
Same ^ we’re starting with the best grade embryo. We asked the clinic to not share the sex info with us so we don’t know what we have and can’t act on our preferences. I don’t see it as playing God, I’m just a bit superstitious and am hesitant to ask too much for something I want. And long-term the child will be whatever they want to be, so our preferences at this stage don’t mean much.
Pro
You don’t have to find out the gender. You can just have the office transfer one they pick.
Pro
You can always tell the IVF doctor that you don’t wanna know the gender, and let them pick the best embryo. This way, you are not picking gender.
Rising Star
If youvdobgenetic testing, your clinic will know. You can say whether you want to know too.
Conversation Starter
My doctor didn’t ask about our opinion. He just transferred the “oldest” embryo that has the highest quality , from a previous round. It happened to be the gender we prefer.
Yea TBH beggars can’t be choosers and everyone going through ivf would rather be doing this naturally. You go by best embryo (and euploid). People generally don’t have hoards of perfect embryos and they just choose sex based on preference
We had no preference on gender. We had 5 male and 5 female embryos and the highest graded one was a female so we went with that one.
I feel like something that has been sorta hinted at by other commenters but not thoroughly stated outright is that not every IVF cycle means you will learn (or choose) the gender of your baby. Basically, you can choose to have a fresh transfer (where the transfer of the embryo is 5-7 days after your egg retrieval) or a frozen transfer (where the embryo transfer takes place in a completely separate cycle). If you opt for a fresh transfer, you can't do genetic testing, and you therefore can't find out the gender of the embryo. But, say you transfer two embryos fresh but yield three or more through what's often called the hunger games (the attrition after the eggs are retrieved) -- you have the option to test whatever is left and then freeze the euploid (aka good) embryos for use in later cycles (because your first transfer might or might not be successful).
If you're younger than 35, clinics often don't suggest you do genetic testing because your egg quality is more likely to be good than not, and genetic testing is rarely a covered service (though it is for me). I did three retrievals late age 37 using donor sperm and had a 40% euploid rate (6 out of 15). Hope this helps; happy to answer follow-up questions and best of luck to you!
Definitely helpful! Thank you so much!!
We decided it against it. I don’t know why but choosing the gender just didn’t sit right with me lol
Gender was very important to me. I had very highly graded embryos and was going to transfer 2 embryos, so just chose 1 male and 1 female. But my RE gave me a choice to know the genders upfront. I hate surprises 😀.
I’m happy it’s illegal in Canada to gender select or for them to even tell you what gender the embryos are. Otherwise I would never want to do this but not sure if the curiosity wouldn’t get better of me and I’d want to know gender before you even know if it sticks
Rising Star
Good for you
I don’t get this question. You get to choose to select the gender or not. If you are not comfortable, don’t do it. In my case, I chose genders. It was important to me to have 1 of each.