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As someone who’s Asian I can tell you feeling invisible is a huge part of the problem in times like these. Even if your message sounds corny, I would send something. Worst they do is roll their eyes.
Thanks for asking this! Would that more counsels/partners asked this, I wonder if AAPI attorneys would feel more significant.
Short answer: I would do what is comfortable and normal in your relationship.
Some background for you:
Everyone is handling/processing the news differently. From what I can see in my community, the general response falls into: (1) numb/smile and carry on/distance yourself (model minority approach) ; (2) anger and frustration (loss of sense community and questioning what being American means); and (3) fear for either kids or parents/aunts/uncles.
I am just one data point. But, from what is being reposted and liked the most seems to be like this comic. A simple check-in, an acknowledgment that there is pain and/or anger. The acknowledgment is key. Why?
Daniel Dae Kim presented to Congress today on a hearing on anti-Asian sentiment. He mentioned how pollsters rarely break out Asian Americans as a separate category bc we are “statistically insignificant.” The AAPI voice is small. We know that more than anyone and those that have succeeded haven’t succeeded by making waves. Therefore, we are the easiest minority to beat up on. We have been the easiest to gaslight.
We know that most people don’t know as much as us about the rising violence because unless it is a murder of 8 people, American media is not interested... simple individual murders, punches, slashings, etc, isn’t going to make mainstream news.
But, the AAPI community is currently reacting to all of this. Not just the 8 (6 Asians) murdered on Tuesday night. That was just the cherry on top and the sheriff saying the murders were the result of the murderer having a bad day the chocolate drizzle. Like did you know, on the same day two other elderly members were attacked in SF? Not to mention two other separate attacks on younger Asians occurred in NYC yesterday as well. And, yes, they were racially motivated. One told the Asians to go back to “communist China.” This was just one day...
So, an acknowledgment that the anti—Asian sentiment is rising and that our reactions are being heard/are valid would be nice. B/c no, it’s not just rising crime. These incidents are occurring in otherwise safe neighborhoods in broad daylight.
Also, for a quick perusal of what the AAPI community has been dealing with: nextshark.com or on Instagram is nice. From what I have seen, American media picks up 10% of these incidents. And, all of the reports on nextshark generally come with video evidence because as Asians, we know that without evidence, our complaints will be dismissed.
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Thanks for the responses. Very helpful.
I personally have appreciated notes from friends and acquaintances, whether it’s a text, email, or social media post. An “I see you, I see what’s going on, I’m here if you need anything” or “just wanted to let you know I’m thinking about you and I’m here if you need anything” means a lot to me. I got one call from a colleague out of the blue asking how I’m doing, and even though I appreciated it, it disrupted an already busy work day when I was trying to focus, so depending on your relationship, I probably wouldn’t call someone out of the blue just to ask them how they are and to tell them that you’re thinking about them. Thanks for asking!