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1+1 does not equal 2 with the kids. Know that in order to take care of your loved ones you need to prioritize your own mental and physical health.
Working out every day no matter how early or late has done wonders for my mental health and enabled me to cut through the brain fog of trying to deliver at work and home.
If working out weren't helping me personally, my next move would likely be some sort of therapy.
I wish you the best as you work through it.
❤️❤️❤️I really appreciate this
I could have written this same post when my kids were young. As PM1 said, try to find something for you. For PM1, it was working out. For me, it’s taking an edible and relaxing on the couch after the kids go to sleep.
Agree with PM1 also that if you can’t find something to give you daily or regular release, try therapy.
Good luck, friend. Hang in there.
Yeah I used to be you. Just unhappy and using to try to cover it up. I would suggest try to cut the drinking and weed, replace with working out and meditation:) it doesn’t have to be overnight but whatever calm or distraction you think you’re getting from that stuff is hurting you. Also remember having young kids is really fing difficult. Things will get better in a few years.
Also it sounds like your wife wants to be there for you but all this is tough on her too. See if you can build in a routine of spending at least an hour 1:1 with her a day. Maybe a nice combo of sex, dessert in bed, and a tv show. You choose the order.
People would tell me to go take a trip with my buddies when I was in a funk like this. I tried. It wasn’t really for me. It was a lot of drinking and bragging.
But I did start taking a solo trip once a year to do something I really wanted to do. A lot of these involve driving for hours and just listening to music, going somewhere with some interesting nature, live music, or maybe a cool museum. And then camping or staying in a nice hotel if I’m in a city, then heading back the next day.
This really helps to take an inventory of everything I have in life, the people that love me, etc.
(Cont.) by loved ones I mean my friends and wife. Don’t really talk much to my bio family. My wife says I’m miserable and seem to love choosing that option. One of my friends feels the same about me but I feel like I been annoying all my loved ones with my uncontrollable feelings and moods. They might be right because i am so overwhelmed. Got a 2.5 boy and a baby girl incoming. Im just busting my ass all day and feel like im not appreciated. Idk im all over the place. 😣
I just came to this bowl to make a similar post. 100% just a source of income for them to live their lives
Issue for me, maybe for you: there’s also zero time and zero resources to do anything for myself. If I can carve any time out of the day, I need to spend it on kiddo…so it ends up being 9pm before I have any quiet time. The only option for me time then comes in cutting away at sleep, which is all the more challenging when kiddo is awake multiple times a night (usually screaming for mom while I try to comfort him)
I don’t know how people do this. I’m at the end of my rope, and there’s zero help on the horizon