I have to tell my parents that I got engaged this weekend. They haven’t been taking the coming out well over the last year (i.e have isolated themselves from their community, screaming and crying when I’m on the phone with mom, dad hasn’t spoken to me since July). I’m incredibly nervous about this conversation. Going to have it in about two hours. Any words of advice?

I've got some friends who work remote jobs, and every day I grow more jealous of them during my one-hour commute.

My wife reads nearly an entire book per day just in her spare time after work, no exaggeration. I’m amazed by her and wondering what ideas are out there to monetize her skill? Book editing maybe?

My sister might divorce with her husband, they have a baby of 1.5 year. We came from a divorce family and honestly never thought it would happen again - I feel powerless and I don’t know what to do. I feel bad for my sister but I am also mad at her (the fault is always in the middle) because they are not trying to fix it. I am also scared for the baby, I perfectly know what it means to grow up in a divorce family and as much as parents are present is not the same.

I am generally uncomfortable when I’m around my mother-in-law’s husband.

While he is overall a decent guy, his anger issues, yelling at his wife for the slightest issue, and insulting nature makes me uncomfortable and triggers my own anger due to his blatant disrespect for just about everyone around him.

My mother-in-law says he’s worked on things, but it’s been 10 years of this and I’m not sure I want such behavior around my wife and our kids since we’re trying to conceive soon (cont).

So I have been seeing a guy for 4 months. We have a pay disparity.. he earns less than I do (by quite a bit). He has mentioned a few times that he’s worried I’ll get bored of him when I know he can’t afford the same things I can. I think we are beginning to move past this, but now he’s starting to mention things like ‘I am really broke this month’, and last weekend he told me his mum has lost her job and he’ll have to probably pay her rent. I have a lot of sympathy for his situation … tbc

Well, I was the one who broke it off. I couldn’t get him to love me the way I needed or even respect me enough. It’s been 6 weeks of not seeing each other. We messaged this week. He doesn’t get it…. His messages show he still doesn’t know what he wants. Yet, if I am totally honest, I hate how part of me wishes he would do a grand gesture/finally decide to be a better man. It’s delusional. It’s crazy how love can be so rosy, sweet & blinding that the red flags seem surmountable.

Girlfriend has very obvious high functioning anxiety and body image issues that she admits but thinks she doesn’t need therapy or medication and that reading self-help books will help her. It’s not changing in the last several years and it’s impacting our relationship. Anyone have experience with their SO dealing with untreated anxiety? I know I can’t control her but would like to express my feelings without sending her into a spiral. For context, I’ve been in therapy for 12 months and medicated

Ugh, is that time of year again! Does anyone have any advice on how to handle "friends" and family members who spout conspiracy theories to avoid getting the flu shot

Best self-care tips for dealing with loneliness/sadness this time of year? This is my first Christmas without my mom and it just feels like nothing will ever be the same again 😭. If you’ve lost a parent can you give me advice on getting through the holidays? Being a parentalish figure to my students is both healing and heartbreaking.

I felt like a walking zombie during thanksgiving, barely eating and barely talking. My family is small and I told them ahead of time my relationship ended. I focused on my niece and nephews, cried when I wanted to and slept from 8pm-noon for the last 5 days. Showered once or twice. That’s the best I could do and that’s OK right now. I’m back in my apartment, just trying to take it one day at a time, and not re read his texts too much. My birthday is Thursday 🙄

I finally move out in two days and as the day gets closer, it gets so much harder. I love him and it hurts. Even right now, I’m still living with him and I’m in the living room watching tv and he’s working at his station. I think soon I’ll just be occupying my own time alone and not with the person I love. Idk how people do this.

How do you deal with your boyfriend still being friends with someone he slept with before? Kind of bothers me but not sure if it’s normal....

What would you do if you didn’t need money? I have a fair amount coming one day and don’t actually need to work to live a good life (middle / upper-middle class). I work because of this vague notion of “ambition” and because everyone I grew up around is highly competitive and hard driving. I just feel unhappy so often and am wondering what this is all leading to. Scared I’m wasting my life being unhappy / in turmoil cause it’s what my culture wants me to do.

Real talk ... if someone is over 35 and hasn’t been married before, do you automatically assume there is something wrong with them?

How much of a nest egg would you expect a couple to collectively need in order to retire at 40 and live relatively comfortable (not lavish)?

Any NYC 🐡 that would let me borrow their doggo for walks?! I am so missing my old guy, but can’t adopt a new one due to work ☹️

For young professional women out there - how many of you think you might not want to have kids in the future? Generally curious, yes I’m youngish,male (25) but I never envisioned having kids. I come from a more conservative area where everyone does have/want kids. So interested in seeing what a percentage breakdown would look like especially within consulting - thanks!

For the F 🐠 - is it really that hard out there in your city? What’s been your biggest challenge with finding the right guy? Any regrets not making it work w/ an ex or friend zone guy from the past?

Any suggestions for getting kids to do homework? Sped Math 6th grade high need area - I cannot get these kids to turn in hw. Anyone agree with the idea of allowing class time for HW? I am at a loss

Struggling with a friendship that has become toxic & fills me with anxiety. various factors have caused us to drift but it feels like nothing I say or do now is right. The issues seem to really come to a head for one when she is drunk, using it to air grievances with me. When sober she doesn’t feel like talking about it. It feels like we are pretending to be best friends because of history but the substance isn’t there and I just want out of it. Can anyone offer advice?

Hello Friends,
Can anyone apprise me of the expected salary that i can ask for a Solution Architect role in Telstra - India? The band offered will be Band 2 which is confirmed. I just need to know the range Min and Max. I have 15 years of experience now.

Looking for referral at Telstra..pls dm if you can refer

SEEKING OPINIONS & FEEDBACK: I love the honest & practical discussions here, where people can freely identify things that are going on & seek guidance.

Wondering whether anybody’d be interested in some kind of more purposeful community- i.e., gathering w/fellow lawyers to pursue some specific mental health & well-being goals? We’d provide some counseling/coaching type content, in bite sized chunks, but have regular discussions to connect & encourage one another on applying the content IRL.

Hi! Would anyone be willing to refer to for a role at baker botts?

Anyone has joining on 10th october?

Wells fargo or barclays which is better

3 word story game. I'll start, then you add 3 words and do on. Let's make this interesting: Once, there was....

Anyone live at The Grove in Chelsea or Sky apts near Hell’s Kitchen? Have temp housing options there for work and trying to decide.

How is job security, annual hike and onsite opportunity in Publicis Sapient?

Role: Product Manager

Please let me know your views.

Just got laid off last week so if anyone knows of any senior designer roles let me know! Going to take some time to revamp my portfolio and resume but I would appreciate any leads.

I see a lot of people who have crippling anxiety here work out to feel better. My crippling anxiety kind of paralysis my legs (or at least feels like it to the point that I can’t even walk). Does anyone have similar symptoms and solution for it?
I am in therapy right now but just wanted to hear from someone who is also going through it

I heard People in Advisory received performance bonus? True? And how much by level?

Folks, AC Kolkata employee here.
Will management approve my request to buyout half my notice period if i promise to serve the other half? Also, any idea how it will get calculated?

Need ur urgent help and advice on this.

What free PE news sites/blogs do y’all follow

Interested in working in PE, but experiences align more with the Ops side (3 YOE in strategic value creation). Is there a significant difference in total comp potential between ops and investments roles? Not sure how to make a case to break into investments with minimal DD experience, so thinking about Ops recruitment (Associate). Would also be grateful to learn about potential strategies non-DD focused consultants have used to ultimately break into investment teams.

How does this Amazon offer look for an L5 non-tech PM role in Seattle? I’m coming in with 2 YOE as a startup PM. No MBA.

$130K base, 20 RSUs, $45K sign on over 2 years ($25/20). 1st year TC $160K.

It was extended before the recent announcement that TCs are going up but I don’t know if I’d be impacted regardless.

what's the salary range of SM at EY GDS assurance practice ?

Hello, we've recently started a community focused on FAANG Interview preps. Wondering what kind of content people might be interested to see in such communities.

For whatever reason, there are a ton of gay lawyers in Baltimore. On a regular basis,I've noticed myself, opposing counsel, and the judge are all gay. Anyone else experience this where they live?

Hey everyone! Glad there is this bowl!

Where’s my trans & nonbinary fam at?

My partner (also an attorney) is getting top surgery next month, and it will be an inpatient procedure. Any thoughts on how to explain to my firm that I will be out of touch for a day or two without getting too far into the weeds? Should I just say surgery? That seems dramatic.

Happy Thanksgiving all!

Hi gay lawyers in Boston! How are you all holding up during the pandemic?

Any gay folks who are the only gay person? I am the only lawyer for my company and the only gay person too.

Not me applying for admission in California to go help free Britney…

So I just came out at my small firm in a small southern town. Historically, I haven’t discussed my personal life at work— but I had to give notice anyway. I told the partners I’m moving to be with my boyfriend. It was a surprisingly lovely conversation given that I’m at a firm of rich old men, deep in the heart of Tr*mp country.

Any Tampa Bay people in this bowl?? 😊

NYC, anyone going to the gala tomorrow?

Anyone in philly?

Anyone in New York City that can recommend queer legal communities other than just Lambda (which is great! Just want to broaden networking/community opportunities)

Just had a very uncomfortable conversation with a partner. I have some time off booked to go to my brother’s wedding (I’m the best man). We were chatting and I mentioned that my brother’s future husband is so nice and really a great guy, and we already consider him a member of our family. Partner’s tone immediately shifts and as we’re ending the call he says, “Okay, enjoy the time with your family at the civil ceremony.” Like… girl you live in California, you cannot be this backward.

What can law firms do to improve lgbtq numbers? Beyond the meaningless empty stuff they do now.

Any Boston folks?

(Family Law Attorney) Straight clients when their cases are not going my way: Accuse me of sleeping with their ex husbands Queer clients when their cases are not going my way: Come to me with genuine concern because their exes have put a curse on me and I'm being brainwashed to not work hard on their cases It's neat that all my clients who hate me also think that I'm an incredible lawyer who can do anything and am just choosing not to because of my sexuality/susceptibility to witchcraft

What should I be reading or researching? First gen lawyer here, always been small firm. I’m at a 2 attorney firm now and was just approached about becoming a partner. The boss wants to clean up the books so I can review them and we can discuss. Other than professional connections, I have no idea where to turn for info/insight. I’m definitely interested, but obviously this is a big decision, so I don’t think a “partner? Sure, I’m in” is appropriate.

My office knows that I recently came out of the closet to my family- which is fine, but making me feel young. Feeling the need to overcompensate as a result.

We all just grindin (work) or why so quiet?