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The last time I checked, becoming a mother does not equal disbarment. Your career is not over and there is so much more to life than billables and law. I’m sorry you’re feeling like this and if you’re at a firm that does not support you, I hope you’re able to find a new one.
Most importantly, congratulations! I’m 32, have 3 kids, and do defense work, so I understand the pressures around billables and the interplay between law and motherhood. Being mom, for me, is hands down the best part of my life. I hope you find that it is the same for you!
Right now, I do insurance defense (PI/energy/construction) and general commercial litigation (contract disputes etc.). I started out in pure PI insurance defense representing commercial carriers. I had 2 kids when I started out and left that from because the managing partner was malicious and just all around bad. Anyhoo, I work at a midsize boutique firm now. My billables range from 165-200/mon.
I think my biggest part in “making it work” was setting personal and professional boundaries early on. I don’t work or answer calls/emails after 5:30 or on the weekends. I never miss a school performance, baby/kid dr. Appointment, etc. obvi there are exceptions to this but, work is just a job and is second when it comes to my kids and family. My boundaries keep me sane and have always been respected. If they weren’t I’d find some place else.
It’s tough being a woman in law, let alone being a mother too. There’s always this drive to out perform like we have to always prove ourselves. But at the end of the day, you have to do what you want and what’s best for your life. For me, that was setting boundaries and sticking to them. For you, or anyone else, it will be whatever you find to make it all work best.
Congratulations!! Believe me, everything about your life is about to get better. First thing you will discover is that your job is just a job. A means to an end. You don’t even know your “worth” yet, it certainly has nothing to do with billable hours.
I am also curious about your situation and how you are making it work!
I’m a mom to 2 1/2 year old, and also practice insurance defense. I basically had to come to terms with the fact that I wasn’t going to be the top biller for a few years, but otherwise my career is going great. That being said, my firm is very supportive of working parents and women, in general.