Is my relationship worth it? Met my SO of 3 years senior year of college. Hoped we would graduate and start our full time jobs together, but my SO is unfortunately still in school (switched majors, transferred schools, etc). Our relationship has taken a big hit, as I am moving forward with my life but he is still in school and can’t find a job. I am also starting to resent him and he is turning more insecure. I am only 23, is this worth it?

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What do you resent? That he didn’t follow the plan? Lack of ambition? Lack of effort towards the relationship through it all? Lack of communication about his plans and why?


Based on what you said alone, it doesn’t seem like a reason to quit yet, bc if you’re moving to marriage, it is for better or for worse. That means when one of you is unemployed or one of you is sick or one of you is annoying af lol.

If his patience and honesty and forgiveness and communication and love etc. are there and it’s just the timing, it’s worth it. A 23 year old trying to figure out life while he still loving you is worth it.

If he’s still giving his best to the relationship, maybe just communicate your frustrations and ask him to include you in thoughts and ask how you can be a better support to him to work things out, because that I what I would in my marriage. Seeing your support may help him bc you’ve now proven your love and honesty.

Now if the other areas of love and effort are lacking from him and you are frustrated, then that is cause for a deeper conversation with him about how your emotional needs are not being met, and that is more cause to question worth, but his employment status should not be the only indicator.

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You’re only 23— way way way too young for resentments. Be free and live YOUR best life

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