My dad is going through a rough time… he feels lonely because he works abroad and lives alone plus him and my mom are currently not on good terms, and in general he’s just not very happy right now. I know he wants to talk and let all this out with anyone… but I don’t feel ready to be listen to him in this situation. My dad has always been super strong and he’s always been that person who knows what do in every situation and I just can’t listen to him talk about how lonely and sad he is..

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I personally don’t think parents should discuss their marriage with their children in this way, he should talk to a therapist or counselor.
However, it sounds like you’re making harsh judgements “it makes him look weak and I can’t see him like that.” Every single person deals with brokenness, sin, struggles. I’m not saying you have to carry all his burdens in the parent/child relationship, but you absolutely should have some grace and understanding with your dad. You could tell him you want to support him but are not in the best position to listen to certain details and encourage him to find someone to talk to, help him check with insurance, find an online support group or church, etc. and support him in other ways like texting to check in, send him snacks or a book to read, help him connect with community where he is.

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Thank you PM1, appreciate it.

I agree with PM1! If I’ve learned anything in therapy it’s setting boundaries and that applies to family. I don’t think it’s appropriate for parents to disclose everything to children. You can be supportive and be available but you could also point him to therapy or community

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It makes him look weak and I just can’t see him like that. I also can’t listen to him tell me about all the problems he has with my mom… i just don’t want to listen to anything negative about my mom, and same with my mom about my dad. Do you think i am being selfish? Should i still try and listen to him and let him talk to me about it? I need your prayers 🙏🏽

Yes this is on the selfish side. Your dad needs you right now and he was always there for you. You’re an adult now and have to do difficult things at times. This is one of them.

That said, you can always set boundaries on what is spoken. Like a good one is that he can talk about his feelings and emotions but not speak negatively about your mother.

E.g.
“I feel X” as opposed to “Your mother did this, etc.”

Your parents raised you and had to be strong for you while you were a kid, though this was meant to protect you, this might have created a false image of them to be perfect which is normal. As an adult, you should know better. Try being strong for them too.

Thank you A1

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