2 months into my job at an MBB, am averaging 60-70ish hours on my first project. Worried about my relationship - traveling M-Th and while I’ve been trying to invest 100% of my weekend into meaningful time with my partner (3 years together and just out of school), the time sink work causes has definitely started to bother her. Work isn’t gonna change - any best practices to avoid letting my relationship slip away in the time coming?

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When I started with MBB, the first couple of months was a grind i.e similar to yours , 60ish hours. But over time I became more efficient and also learnt how to prioritize hard, which included balancing my personal life vs work life.

Since then, I have averaged 45-50 over the years across different stages of my career.

So my advice: Don’t let work get to you, rather focus on finding the right balance to get hours down.

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Also depending on OPs MBB, they may soon be supervising, which opens up a world of flexibility from a time perspective. IE, you can spread those 50-70 hours out in a much more sustainable way

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I’m surprised you haven’t talked to her already. Does she not know the demands of your job?

Talk to her asap. Make sure you’re both on the same page in terms of what your lifestyle will be and how long you’re planning on staying.

Is it the travel or the hours that bother her?

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I think communication is #1. Be aware of how she’s doing, make her feel understood.

Try to compromise, focus on spending quality time during the weekends. Make an effort to keep constant comms whenever possible while you’re away.

It’s not easy, I’m lucky to have had a very understanding partner (now at mck herself) throughout.

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Prioritize weekends is the key. We do everything together on the weekends, down to errands and just hanging out. It’s worked wonders for us and makes weekends super fulfilling.

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Take 30 mins during or after dinner to call each day and then again before bed. Do video calls. And try phone sex.

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Honestly in previous relationships those phone calls / FTs while in the car or after a long day just catching up, really brought us closer.

I love travel, but it’s not for everyone. There should be plenty of projects that don’t require M-Th travel? Maybe that will help?

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