I've got an offer to work at a place and they want me to come join us asap preferrably this month but they can manage mid-dec. My company has one month notice period, I'm getting married in Dec and ideally would like to start in Jan because I want my bonus at end of the year (although the amount is not that big). The verbal offer was given late Oct. How do I negotiate this?

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Just tell them you won’t be able to start until Jan 1 with your notice period plus wedding. If it’s a deal breaker I’m sure you can work something out. If you dangle the bonus they might pay it. Depends on your priorities.

If it were me I would say I can start December but need to take x weeks off for wedding/honeymoon shortly after starting and see what they say. Might as well get paid for it! I did this but started couple before wedding in London.

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I'm in the same boat. Earlier it wasn't a problem for the company if I joined late but now the HR is saying they need me to join within 45 days.

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Be as transparent as possible.

Tell them you are a person who would always be committed to their team, and just like you won't leave your new team in limbo you wouldn't want your current team in limbo and you need to finish the project. Additionally you are also getting married and it wouldn't be best to take weeks off in your first 2 months, so best case is to join in January.

If you frame it this way, they'll appreciate it.

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What country?

not US/UK, Asia

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