As a woman, I feel like the Indian culture/mentality is a burden. Do any other women feel this way? Do men feel this way? What can we do to change this (on an individual scale)? Therapy?
Parts of the mentality that feel burdensome to me PERSONALLY: parental expectations and societal expectations regarding sexuality, marriage, age, past trauma (sexual assault), motherhood.
Pro
Your mom not liking her is your issue, don’t make it sound like you don’t have any control here, if anyone has any responsibility to resolve, it’s you.
Totally agree with this! I too was in that position, he wouldn’t do anything to back me up, I ended up giving back the ring. In the end, you two are a team, this is YOUR life, you set the tone…not your mom, not your grandma, no one, but the both of you…if you can’t do that, she will walk away (as she should) 🤷🏻♀️
Rising Star
Do you set healthy boundaries with your mom? If I were your gf, that’d be a huge determinant. If I didn’t believe you could protect our relationship and put us first, even if it meant going against your mom’s wishes, I’d walk away too
I definitely get it, it’s not easy to move forward without family approval. Makes things messy in the future as well
I kinda get it though
I recommend having a discussion with your mom on this one. Your girlfriend’s concerns are valid; she’s marrying into a family in addition to you. I would reinforce how happy your girlfriend makes you and highlight all of the qualities that make you love her. I would then let your mom say her piece and determine if there’s a resolution. If her concerns are genuine, listen to her and take them into account before taking the next step with your gf. Sometimes people see what you don’t see.
Y’all need to watch about 3 kdramas together and y’all will be okay
So I was in a 4 year relationship with my ex and from the beginning her parents never approved of me. It didn’t matter at first but it kept eating away at our relationship and ultimately was the reason why we broke up years later. I assumed they would come around but they never did and it was horrible being the reason why my ex didn’t have a great relationship with her parents. Definitely something worth talking about in detail and understanding why your GF is worried about this - in my case i probably wouldn’t want to be in that situation ever again.
Oh I'd be outtie
Are your mom’s feelings legitimate? Or is your mom being overly attached to you.
Why doesn’t your mom like her?
25. I'm 27 for perspective
How did she find out your mom doesn’t approve?