What should I say/do? On Friday afternoon my boss asked me to join a meeting (on zoom). I didn’t understand a thing, but he would fill me the details later. After the meeting we continue to do other works (seperadly, with other people) and I completely forgot to talk with him about that case. Sunday night I received a message “FYI, you vanished, so I did it myself” with the documents attached. I honestly forgot about it. Yes, he could have talked to me, but was supposed to talk to him either. 😞

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I don’t necessarily think it was your sole responsibility to seek further instructions. You showed up for the zoom meeting like he asked, he said he would fill you in and you were available to receive the information he said he would communicate. Agreed that it would have been a good idea to reach out if he didn’t after a while but it was a shared responsibility if not his to reach out. Seniors are busy so it makes more sense for them to contact you when they have time, knowing you’re at their disposal. Also, blaming a junior or making then feel like they failed without even giving them the benefit of the doubt is slightly perverse.

likehelpful

I understand... I’m just nervous because after the meeting I said “I have to finish some things and organize my notes and then we talk, ok” and he said ok (as he was also busy). Like I said, I forgot, it was late, etc.

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What kind of boss allows an associate to “vanish?” If he’s not going to ping you when he needs help with something, that’s his problem not yours.

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Ah, this is par for the course for many in law firms. Abdication of managerial responsibility, blame shifting, martyrdom... I see that you are only a junior associate. Trust me, you’ll get a lot more of this (and worse) in the coming years.

My only advice is to not bite back. As strange as that sounds, if a boss has decided to blame you for their own mistakes, you’re not going to convince them otherwise with logic. You’ll just dig the hole deeper.

likehelpful

Thank you! I sent him a very polite email acknowledging my mistake, apologizing and stuff like “I hope we can continue working on the future”, that I enjoy working with him, etc. none of this is a lie, but I was caught by surprise by the fact that he didn’t answer my email nor answered my calls. I came to the same conclusion you’ve just explained: he decided to be pissed off and that’s that.

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Cont... I will, of course, call him and apologize for what happened. Say stuff like “I know I screwed up (I really do), I’m so sorry, this won’t happen again. I was involved with something else and got carried away. I do hope we can still work together etc.” (he’s not my boss directly, he’a a senior from another area that I sometimes work with)

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This sounds like he is joking about it, why are you worried?

I just couldn’t believe some would say this seriously. Don’t worry, everyone makes mistakes and this doesn’t define you!

likehelpful

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