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Anyone here 40s never married, no kids?
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My friends and I when we go out
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Hi, I've recently got selected to IBM GBS, and my husband working for PSU I am from Andhrapradesh and IBM location is Chennai. I've 1year baby. Due to this I can't relocate to Chennai. Is there anyway to handle this like working remotely from my home ? Will IBM allows me to do like that. ? IBM Infosys Tata Consultancy Accenture Amazon
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Smarht Parhk? Nice .
Thoughts on this Town Hall?
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Any single women like houses?
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Chief
I wanna go home 😫
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Love to see Duke lose
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Is it cool to use slang when with co workers?
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best drama stories
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unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
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Potential options:
1. Fake your own death
2. Tell them you're a state witness and need to go incommunicado under witness protection
3. Get a restraining order against them
I love this, thanks for the laugh 😂
Pro
Start ignoring
I slowly ghost, it sucks but even trying to do the exit can be emotionally draining. If they ask why you don’t hang/talk it’s up to you if you want to share.
Enthusiast
Don't think of it as "ghosting". (Unless you're planning on blocking them everywhere.) Think of it as backing away slowly. Letting them initiate contact, but only engaging when you have the time AND mental/emotional energy. If she wonders why you respond to her texts every other month instead of every other day, she'll know.
I also think "closure" is b.s. for drama queens. People who say they "just want closure" really want a different ending to a relationship than the one they're getting. Usually the dumpee wanting the dumper to change their mind. I don't know if you're hoping that you listing her flaws will magically change her into a better person. But you've tried that. You told her a few times she needs to change, and she hasn't. She's not going to. She is who she is, and that's that.
One day my wife took me aside and told me “this person is making you a worse human being and unhappy, every time you talk with her you have a negative outlook and takes a long time to go back to your self. You should consider stopping talking to her.” I was taken aback, I reflected and came to conclusion she was right. And so I ghosted. For which I feel terrible because I didn’t have the courage to hit this topic head on with my friend - that would be the only thing I would do differently, even though it would be a very difficult conversation. My wife was also instrumental in helping me staying the course and not respond to messages/emails/LinkedIn/other social media when I was about to because I was feeling so bad. But again, if I could do something differently I would just tell the person in their face as tactfully as possible.
Yeah, I didn’t feel great when I ghosted in the past. Friendship breakups are always tough but we need to also prioritize our own wellbeing.
Rising Star
Like you’re firing someone. Say you’re no longer the right fit for one another, wish them well, then remove them from your directory.
If she lives in a different city and you don’t see her often, then slowly start ghosting. She probably doesn’t want to hear you tell her you’re actively breaking up your friendship because she drains your energy - so it’s better for you both to just slowly stop responding, stop engaging with her. I did this with a friend and while it was hard, it was 100% the right thing for me to do. We talk very occasionally now and whenever we do she still only talks about her problems and it reminds me every time that I’m glad I ended our close friendship!
If she lives near you, then you can’t really just ghost. That might require a more direct way of telling her that you’re not in a great headspace and don’t have capacity for her problems. I would still not straight up tell her you’re breaking up you’re friendship because it prob won’t end well.
Enthusiast
Make a list of your Top 10 friends.
Include her on one iteration, then on the next post, remove her.
She’ll get the message.
It’s like MySpace Top8 but better.
I have backed away and faded out. It is what it is. I once had a “best friend” who was selfish and toxic. One day, I realized that we had only gotten along for all those years because she saw me as lesser than - not a threat or competition. The moment that changed, our relationship became seriously strained with constant drama and hurt feelings. She used to periodically call and ask if we were still best friends, which also bugged me. Finally, one day, she called and asked if we were still best friends and I said no and that we are not friends. I wish she would have let the relationship naturally fizzle, but she wanted it both ways. You are also important and if your friend makes you feel bad then you have no obligations.
Rising Star
Depends. Is he your true friend who you dislike only this aspect?
If so I'd let him know before to see if he can change.
If not he is most likely not your friend - the easiest way is just driving yourself away from him slowly (at least 4 me)
Rising Star
Then I would slowly fade away. People always promise to change but rarely do so.
Bonus point is that she might realize she will lose you and actually change.
Enthusiast
Swiftly and with prejudice