I found out my manager talked to HR about my invisible medical condition after I told her I may need some very minor schedule adjustments for 1-2 weeks, but nothing that requires formal accommodation paperwork. We had agreed ages ago we’d work between the 2 of us and not have HR involved. I was mad she talked to HR without my consent and now, I am suspicious tiny adjustments I rarely need are going to be more complicated. I now don’t trust her to ask for what I need, when I need it. How to deal?

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Disclosure of a conversation isn’t illegal in most countries. While you may feel it’s a breach of trust, I doubt there’s any legal grounds here.

How do you know this conversation happened?

I’d also suggest you explore the possibility that they spoke to HR to ensure you we’re supported. While you may feel that HR didn’t need to be involved, you probably aren’t familiar enough with the company guidance around line management to know for sure. And if your manager is new to line management, THEY might have needed support to support you.

Either way, taking this conversation head on is strongly encouraged. Don’t be accusatory, just ask why they did it and be open to the possibilities that it wasn’t their choice to make or that they were trying to support you.

Also, I’m not a lawyer. Just someone with 25+ years management experience

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In terms of my rights under the ADA, I didn’t have to disclose my condition, but I did because it makes for open communication and understanding. I only told her, not HR. I didn’t witness the conversation so there’d be nothing I could ‘prove’ legally, but is there anything rights-wise that shows this was illegal? I am entitled to formal ‘reasonable accommodations’ under the ADA, but I am unaware of anything that prevents managers from going behind your back and talking to HR about this

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Manager is new to management. What occurs at that level for people that need that new kind of support? Would really be curious.

My manager told me the conversation occurred. I also figure there’s not any actual legal grounds, I just want to avoid any future HR involvement and want to figure out how to best accomplish this. I don’t want these 2 parties to make assumptions about what I may need without my consent moving forward.

Totally get it. My take is that this is a blessing in disguise. Here’s a great opportunity to proactively manage your manager and start learning to manage up.
Too many people find out way too late in life that management is a two way street and that if you aren’t actively managing up, your career stalls.

Don’t take it personally, do set your expectations , and make sure your manager knows what you do and don’t want support in.

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