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I begin by saying I’m a firm believer in monogamy for myself but I’m a huge ally for those who do healthy open relationships. If it works for your partnership where you’re communicating and everyone involved is happy, literally nothing else matters. Others aren’t living your life so if they don’t pay your bills, pay them no mind. Who knows, maybe in the future my own stance might change depending on my partner. But honestly, do you!
In the gay community, I’ve seen more judgment from people who are in open relationships against those who aren’t. I don’t care what you do. But if I don’t do that, don’t say “well you aren’t being realistic” or “that’s why you don’t have a man” or “you obviously haven’t been in a long term relationship then”. There’s a lot of gay men in open relationships that are basically just best friends who call themselves boyfriends to save on rent. That’s fine but don’t criticize me if that’s not what I want.
D5, you are not proving any point besides the fact that you are wrong. You are not being attacked because of your opinion, but because of how you are expressing that opinion by attacking other people and implying falsehoods. If you can’t understand the difference, I’m sorry for you.
Respectfully disagree with the concept of open relationships
I’m in an open relationship (13 years together) and all long term couples that I know also have some sort of open arrangement. My personal opinion is that if both are onboard being open, there is nothing to criticize.
We see a lot of posts here from people that were cheated on by a long term partner and decided to end the relationship because they can’t handle an open relationship. That’s a lose/lose proposition in my view.
A couple of weeks ago someone posted a really virulent attack on open relationships here saying people stay in them for fear of being alone. The worst was to have had my reply to that reported as excessive negativity.
Right!
If both of you are ok with it, who am I to judge? None of my f***ing business
Being LGBT puts you in the minority so we all know what it's like to be treated differently. For that reason, we should all learn to keep an open mind and refrain from judging others. Two consenting adults can perfectly decide what works for them and should be able to do so without judgement. Discrimination is just wrong.
Stop buying into majority stereotypes. As a POC who has faced an additional layer of discrimination from our own community, this question feels like..."do you support dating someone of another race?" Some will answer that they aren't racist but that they aren't attracted to other races, etc...this logic is a form of subconscious discrimination. While not the same, shunning those in open relationships is a form of discrimination.
Accenture 1...I agree that race versus sexuality versus choice to participate in open relationships are different, but the point is that all groups can face discrimination and discrimination in general is wrong. We all my have our individual biases, but to we should strive to keep an open mind and be supporting of each other. Interracial relationships are acceptable by many today but 50 years ago this was a huge taboo. It takes time for society to become accepting of minorities. But all of us, as a group, being LGBT...know how it feels to be different and therefore we should be leaders in inclusiveness and keeping open minds.
Open relationships may not work for everyone, but they do work for some and we should respect life decisions of consenting adults.
I’m in one and don’t care what people think. I’m happily with my partner for 10 years, that matters more than what strangers think.
I could never be in one but I also understand 100% the perspective on people that are in one, I really don’t think it depends on the person
I’m not now, but have been in open relationships in the past. They were some of my healthiest, happiest relationships I had ever been in. When I met my current partner, they were not interested at all in an open relationship and that has been just fine with me. I’m still fully supportive of people who choose that kind of relationship together.
Wonder how your "current" partner feels when you talk about your wonderful and happiest PAST memories of open relationships and then refer to your current relationship as "fine". 🚩
Not in one, but also not bothered about them either. As long as everyone is an adult and consenting I can’t judge. I think they should all be able to marry as well so long as there is documentation that all parties directly involved approve of the union.
Interesting...for the purpose of this poll, I think most people would distinguish between open relationship and polyamory (polyamory as having multiple romantic relationships, and open relationship as being exclusively sexual). But as I said, there’s no single definition of open relationship.
I could never be in one and do judge people who are in one. That’s just me. And I won’t even go into the reasons because they won’t get us anywhere.
Play nice fellas! MC1 is right this is just a poll. That said, this is clearly a sensitive topic and emotional responses and debates are inevitable, so comment at your own risk!
I literally had a conversation today about this with my boyfriend lol. I personally don’t support them. I feel like they open the door for a overly sexualized world and I would just rather be with one person.
For those who choose not to do monogamy, I can sort of understand the perspective and would rather someone be honest about not wanting to be monogamous than cheating, but do wonder why it’s hard to just have some healthy self control towards one person
I think the mutual decision to have an open relationship needs to be intellectual for some. It won't work well for all couples but it may for certain couples. Being able to talk through the decision while respecting your partner is a sign of maturity.
I’m in a somewhat open relationship at the moment. When my partner and I met we were upfront about our inevitable desires to sleep with other people (NSA of course). Since we both want the same thing we figured that we can open things up by playing with other people, but only together. We just don’t see the point of doing things separately when we would both enjoy the experience. We set our boundaries and openly communicate and I couldn’t be happier. No one should be judged for their relationship preferences.
I am not in an open relationship, but my partner and I have talked about being open to it if either of us wanted to try it out.
On a slightly unrelated note, I am curious, and excuse my amateur question: is the concept of open relationships prevalent or talked about in heterosexual relationships? Asking coz I have not heard any of my hetero friends talk about it, but the topic does come up quite often in my gay circles. Wondering what could be the reasons behind this... 🧐
Pro
Idk I’m a man and find the whole concept overwhelming in the first place...
I’m always down to star in a one-off special lol
I’d never be open to an open relationship, but I don’t judge others who are.
Community Builder
Whether you are for or against open relationships, what do you think about bringing in others to yours and your partner’s bedroom, for a “play together only” type scenario? It’s not open in that you can’t see other people outside your relationship, neither romantically nor sexually, but also not entirely monogamous, romantically yes but not sexually.
My fiancé and I operate in this way. We call it Monogam-ish or an Ajar relationship. Like the door is cracked and we both have the ability to open it, but we don’t leave it open on the daily. And when we do want some fresh energy infused we find someone to play with together.
He has some social anxiety so usually I’m the seeker lol.
Chief
To each their own. I make no opinion of what others do or their relationships. I would not want an open relationship for me.
Community Builder
Can you give examples what rules do you have in ur open relationship? I am trying to educate myself abt open relationship and want to make myself to be ok with it
I see the pros and cons of it, and while I consider sex to be mostly unrelated to love and partnership, I stay in a committed relationship because sex itself has never been of importance to my happiness or mental health. My partner is very traditional and would never want an open relationship either, and we are very happy almost a decade later.
“Traditional”
Uh hu...