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Anyone else feel like you just can’t survive in Big 4 because you have a family?

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Leave for industry. That's what I had to do. I'll never get this time back when they are little. My career isn't who I am or what I want to define my life. Best decision ever.

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This is obviously not big 4, and Crowe has a lot of flexibility. My oldest is 3. I think it's hard to give it your all and be there for the family. I feel like I'm winging it... and I'll do it for as long as I can.

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Totally agree with winging it. Sometimes I call it living “just in time”

Crowe 1, that’s how I feel... I’m just winging it until I can’t any longer

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Crowe1 - our nanny was there during the week until 7pm. We had the kids all weekend. Were there weekends that I had to work - yes, but honestly not that many. Now with that said, I didn’t have kids till I was a Sr Manager - so I do think that helps but the years leading up to making Partner/Principal are pretty grueling. I can’t speak to your firm or your teams. However, for EY ITS in NY I had plenty of flexibility that I saw my kids. I made sure I did. Technology helps with that. When they were younger on Mon-Thurs the Nanny gave them dinner by the time I was home. But either my wife or I did bath, bed and books. As the kids got older they ate later and I started cooking dinner for them. I still do. Now they help me. Now they go to bed later then me :) Again, my wife and I were able to make it work. My group takes work life balance seriously. My legacy is my family. Within 10 years of my retirement no one at EY will know who I was. My family is my legacy I wrote a review to a Sr Mgr who had a new baby at home that he was spending too much time in the office and was setting a bad example. I meant that and he took it to heart. Now I am not an auditor; I don’t have the same kind of busy season, etc. However we are a pretty busy group overall. So, sure there were some sacrifices when they were younger. Yes. Did I work late (from home) after they went to bed. Yes. There was travel from time to time. But in my opinion and from my experience you can make it work. EY has afforded me the flexibility to do so. It took work, but it was worth it in my opinion. I am a senior Principal now. I make great money. Have even more flexibility. We go on great family vacations; build lots of great memories. We cook dinner together, etc.

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I do and I even have in-laws helping with my little one...

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Deloitte 2, I get it. Mine is gone most evenings, so it’s all me in the morning and at night until they go to bed.... and by then I am completely wiped out and really don’t want to think about work. 😖

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Ya it sucks, and I try to be there when I can, but at the same time I’m ok with it because their still young and won’t remember this part of their life anyways lol and two, every second I’m busting my ass is another $ or opportunity I can give them that I didn’t have growing up. It’s weird because growing up my parents were around a lot, so I only hope to find balance and their understanding when their old enough to realize I was busting ass for their clothing, shelter and education. Not saying I’ll never jump to industry but right now I’m contempt.

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Totally. Which...is why I left.

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ITS Principal here - it is hard when they are younger. I have two kids they are 16 and 13 now. My wife is a lawyer. One of us had to be home by 7 each.l night to relieve the nanny. I would see the kids till they went to bed and then we’d have dinner and I would log on again. When the kids are young it is really hard. I found EY gave me the flexibility to make it work. I was able to go to my kids doctors appointments and I make their sporting events, plays, etc. I love to cook and am home now (yes I am a Principal so it is easier) to cook dinner for the family most nights. I can promise you you can make the B4 with kids work

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EY4, you can make it, for sure. But will I be able to live with it? If I don't want a nanny, if I want to cook for my kids (still a senior), if I want to read them stories, give them a bath, as well as take them to bday parties and play dates on weekends (mostly Saturdays).... can I do that? Or do I have to pick? I wish people were more realistic. Yes. Get a nanny and you're good. No. If I want to be there and raise my kids and see them grow... that is not happening in PA. Also... with a senior pay, who can afford a nanny for two kids and a decent life?

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Well that’s why I didn’t go B4 but now I’m like “what if I’d gone Big 4!"

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I’ve tried to go to industry many times...never get picked up.

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Almost every day

Yes.

Every damn day

YES

Yes

Not big 4. But yeah. Prob will leave because of it.

My kids don't even know me anymore

I’m sorry y’all feel like this, too, but it’s comforting in a way to know I’m not alone. How long have you made it with kids?

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