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Is there anything wrong with your boss? Just say, "appreciate it but I'm good." It's that simple. However, they may not take it kindly. So perhaps just go to lunch with them? I know it sounds like it'll be gratifying if you don't go, but it isn't. And, you'll unnecessarily burn a bridge. I'm going to tell you something that I wish someone had told me when I was younger - always take the high road when it comes to your career.
Chief
It’s not my boss its me. I have anxiety in 1:1 settings. It’s not work related either I get it at the doctors office too.
Just go! I get it - if you don’t have a real connection with your boss it might feel uncomfortable but you will be surprised how comfortable it is outside of a working environment and you might be able to bond over something you have mutually in common with each other
yeah, it would be really weird to decline this sorry....
Just an opinion on this one. Don't decline it. It's an opportunity to have a good relationship with your boss and to get to know more about the thrust of your company.
Chief
We do have a good relationship we chat here and there and we are in a cube setting with others around. it’s not like I go over to his cube and vice versa when we chat about things. And other ppl chime in bc we talk loud enough to invite conversation from others. These chats are very short like 3 mins if that
Why do you want to decline lunch with your boss? I would accept the invitation but I wouldn't engage for longer than 30 minutes tops.
Go to the lunch. Be grateful for the opportunity to connect and meet in person. Many of us would love that opportunity!!
I have never had a boss who offered to take me out to lunch like that. Why do you feel uncomfortable going for the lunch?
Chief
Bc I have anxiety in 1:1 settings.
If you are going to decline the celebration lunch with your boss I would suggest you just tell him about the anxiety. This will seem much more strange to him if you don't. Just speak up. It sounds like he has a ton of respect for you.
Chief
No need to. Boss was cool with it. I have a great work relationships with all my coworkers.
Chief
For additional context, I have anxiety and don’t do well in 1:1 settings especially with forced conversation/small talk about my life outside of work with work people. It’s not a work thing either, I get like that at the doctors office too. I’m fantastic when I’m in front of a group even public speaking and presenting.
I told my boss today that I appreciated the celebration this week (I was awarded with a plaque, gift, and cupcakes) and the recognition was beyond my expectations. And I asked him if we can schedule the lunch for another time.
And without any questions or a blink of an eye he said “absolutely just let me know whenever works for you”.
Try to leave your comfort zone and go out to lunch with your boss. Although it may be awkward for you, you cannot measure the value of developing a deeper, more productive relationship with him her
Go to the lunch!
Chief
Update.
I declined the lunch with my boss and he was cool with it. And he said for me to let him know when I wanted to reschedule.
My boss and I have a great working relationship and there is a mutual respect. I know everyone here has said it’s a bad move but not if you have established a mutual respect and good work relationship. And my boss established that on the first day and maintained it ever since. My boss and I are the same age and never once has he made me feel like a subordinate and in conversations with others he never refers to me as his employee or his direct report…I was always called his colleague.