I have been over who they are today/when we broke up for a long time. But I’m having trouble moving past who i thought they/we COULD be

How do I get rid of this attachment to this nonexistent version of this perosn in my head

Completely off topic
I don't have any friends.. sometimes i feel very lonely.. i don't have anyone to share my thoughts or feeling.. there is this void.. trying to pickup things to distract myself but it's not helping much... Seeking your inputs!! Sorry for this off topic question.

My sister might divorce with her husband, they have a baby of 1.5 year. We came from a divorce family and honestly never thought it would happen again - I feel powerless and I don’t know what to do. I feel bad for my sister but I am also mad at her (the fault is always in the middle) because they are not trying to fix it. I am also scared for the baby, I perfectly know what it means to grow up in a divorce family and as much as parents are present is not the same.

Anyone know how much a full time nanny in the Austin area would cost?

I have a para/assistant teacher that just wants to argue over everything. “You’re the teacher, why do I have to assess the children during break out rooms?” We have 8 kids, and I am only asking her to do 3! The other para is doing 3 and I and doing 2 with IEPs!!! How am I supposed to handle this in a professional manner virtually? Plus she is frustrated b/c o can’t explain everything. I keep telling her it’s all new to me too. Grace is not a word in her vocab. And I am feeling graceless.

Need advice and help.

I have realized I grew up in a household where my dad did not treat my mom as an equal. He belittles her, is rude and convinced his way is the only way.

It is painful to say, but some of this shows up in me and in my relationship. I am starting to catch myself, and it to me seems to be more of a reaction than anythjng that is ever intentional.

Wondering if anyone has dealt with something similar, and any success in making changes besides therapy. Cont. in comments

Anyone else struggling with hormones / mood swings? I am almost 16 weeks and been having a real tough time lately, feeling really down and stressed about things. Sadly, causing tension between me and my partner as well as he cannot relate and seems preoccupied with business as usual. Trying to get out the funk and just telling myself it’s all the hormones.

I’m hoping to steer clear of any scams by posting & I know it’s been posted before but, again, scams. Anyway, I am looking for something that can be done remotely on nights and weekends after I get home from my daily in-office job. My sister passed away & I’m now helping raise her kids. With Christmas coming, I’m nervous and dreading the season not only to not have her but will I make it a happy one for the kids. I need extra income but need to be home with them in the evenings.

Anyone else feeling pressure from Asian parents to find a significant other to get married and have kids?

What is your favorite parent communication tool and why? I used Seesaw this last year and it worked fine, but I’m considering checking out class dojo. Thoughts?

Been seeing a guy for the past few months. Went to watch a movie on Netflix last night and saw that my ex is in a new series. Talk about mood killer. Now I can’t stop thinking about him 😞
He tends to pop in to my head at least once a month. How can I move past this?

Hi i lost majority of my money in the stock market. I married and promised my family that I will not make the mistake I made 7 years ago. Gambling. Is this an addiction I have. I keep selling stocks and taking loses buying other stock hoping it will recover but never did and sell again taking loses and buy again. It now sink in to me. I borrow personal loan hoping that the market will do k and I pay it back but I even lost that. I can't stop crying that I hurt the one I love the most my family.

Moving to Philly Nov 1, just signed a lease in Queen Village. Coming from LA where I was part of a volleyball group and had a lot of options at the beach. Suggestions on making friends and being active (while still being respectful of covid rules & health of all)? 36 F

I'm an engineer, and I feel like my manager is more of a friend than anything else. We talk about our personal lives, and I feel like it's hard to be completely honest with her when she's so casual with me. I don't want to lose our friendship, but I also need to be able to talk honestly with someone who has the power to help me grow professionally. Is there a way to have both?

On the topic of intimacy with partners… I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2 years and the past year his libido has dropped to zero. Mostly due to work stress (he says). Whenever I try to initiate, he always shuts me down and says he’s not in the mood. I even touch him and he gets hard but stops me as soon as I try to unzip him. We went from once a week to maybe once a quarter.

I’ve talked to him about it and he says I should take care of myself. So frustrated. 😭😭

My partner hates my long working hours.

It is really hard to do well in this business without sacrifice and my partner doesn't like it. To be fair that sacrifice is her... Most nights,over the weekend, and during every meal. She deserves better but I either sacrifice time or sacrifice earning potential.

I don't know how to solve this problem.

Been with my GF since college and we recently hit the 4 year mark. 1-2 years into our relationship I found out she had instances of micro-cheating (flirting with guys, talking to ex’s etc - but nothing physical) and we addressed it. To her credit and my knowledge, she’s been apologetic and great at respecting boundaries since, but I still feel the pain from her actions years ago (and have talked to her about it). Feeling lost about whether to just leave or to try and work things out

Silly question but, how did you make close friends when you first moved to Miami? Feeling like a fish out of water, from Texas.

I love living in Miami, but have found it incredibly difficult to make friends. I had a thriving social life/ friend group in Chicago. Anyone else finding it hard to build friendships here?

My fiancé will NOT stop talking about her ex. After I found out they were texting arguing she justified it by saying it was about the dogs and not them. Even though Her social media is full of his pics. She still sends him $50 a month for dog food, still goes to work right by his place and suspiciously needs keys. I try to bring it up and I get dismantled for being too mean and making “false accusations.” How much more obvious can it be?

Forgive the basic question but can you contract around state statutes? For ex, customer wants to insert state contractor payment statutes and have that state law govern. I’m assuming the way around this is to have another more preferable state as choice of law?

Is there any profile which is based on purely SQL and nothing else, no excel/tableau/powerbi task.

Hi,

I Got opportunity to give exam for PWC for 1-2 YOE Java Developer for Cyber Security. I can see rounds mentioned as Hirepro Test, Technical Interview and Partner round.Can anyone suggest what topics should i prepare for?TIA

Hey guys… I’m a case worker in child safety and I’m someone who loves being outdoors/dies at a desk all day. I’m hoping to organise that at least once a week I can go to a cafe and catch up on all my case notes that need to go into the system.
So far the only reason I’ve been told no is that “if you do then everyone will want to and then no one will be in the office” … how can I convince them that I work better out of the office and get this freedom & mental break for myself?

Hii, someone please let me know the leave travel allowance in bosch.

Is the market slow right now?

I joined pwc 9 months back and have been looking out for a new job since August but dont see many calls coming. What is happening with the market? Want to move out of here for a better pay.

Any MNCs hire me If I performed well in every phases of the interview and I have 2 backpapers in my B.Tech degree course??

I low key miss fridays in the office because I don’t know how to make new friends as a 26 year old

Anyone own a small business that doesn’t require a physical space? Should you have a separate business number or is it fine to use personal number?

Looking for recommendations for LASIK in Chicago. How long did it take to fully recover?

Anyone ever change their delta flight and not have to pay the difference?

How is fujitsu consulting onboarding experience, any new hire can share?

Getting ready to leave my role - looking for community ops, comm ops, member support, account management - anything in those customer facing roles that is paying minimum 75k. Remote preferred, based in Chicago. Background in freight/logistics and healthcare.

Hey can anyone share their thoughts on some of the smaller shops in the Bay? I'm not really familiar with the scene but want to move out there.

I’m so happy this bowl exists 🥹🫶🏼

It’s such an unsettling feeling to want to hear from someone and not want to at the same time. I’m shocked I haven’t thrown my phone against a wall. My mind wants a Rage Room but my body is exhausted and just wants sleep.

I made a mistake. I talked with the ex this morning. He said he misses me. And that while he walk talking to the other woman, he wished he was talking to me instead. And when he saw that I didn’t respond to his texts, he drank a shit ton. And then called this morning.

He’s not willing to commit to the other women because he’s not over me.

I need to block him.

The biggest thing I keep running and running around my head- after 8 months, why did he drop me? When he texted ending it l….it wasn’t me, like we weren’t us, his words were from someone else, like I didn’t matter. It doesn’t matter how much it wasn’t about me, how he chose to end it, and that’s what crushed me. Who I thought I knew was wrong. I want to know how close he was to loving me.

Has anyone dealt with coming to terms with an emotionally abusive relationship? I struggle to admit this (because more drastic examples come to mind), but my therapist mentioned that things like yelling/throwing things/blocking me from leaving the room are also abusive traits my ex demonstrated. It makes me feel alienated from myself — like “how could I have allowed myself to be treated like that?”. Also feeling ashamed to tell anyone

TLDR: Getting over your ex of 2.5 years ghosting you after they said they wanted to reconnect.

I was dating someone for about 2.5 years and then we broke up because of COVID and the long distance was making it too difficult to continue. The break up must’ve been like a 4-5 minute FaceTime because I was very distraught. After we broke up, she started seeing someone else but I was heartbroken and it’s taken me over a year to really get over everything and process those feelings. (Cont.)

As much as I know I need to go through this. Today - I just felt so lonely. I was clingy and needy to strangers and just want to make some sort of physical connection with a human.

Well, I was the one who broke it off. I couldn’t get him to love me the way I needed or even respect me enough. It’s been 6 weeks of not seeing each other. We messaged this week. He doesn’t get it…. His messages show he still doesn’t know what he wants. Yet, if I am totally honest, I hate how part of me wishes he would do a grand gesture/finally decide to be a better man. It’s delusional. It’s crazy how love can be so rosy, sweet & blinding that the red flags seem surmountable.

My partner of 5 years ended our relationship last night. I’m shattered and feel absolutely sick, and I know the healing isn’t going to be easy. We were on the verge of an engagement and I was ready to spend the rest of my life with him.

I don’t know how to approach work during this time. I think I can get by, but I’m definitely not 100%. Should I talk to my boss about it? My team is close-knit and comfortable around each other, but I don’t know if it’s “appropriate.” What would you do?

I just need some Brugal rum, Aventura or Romeo Santos songs on repeat all night…

Why do we always tell people “Be the best version of yourself before starting a relationship?”
I feel this is wrong…first, if you’re someone who constantly wants to be better, this doesn’t work. Also, what happens when you’re going through things and you’re not the best version? What happens is…the going gets tough and then one person leaves the other.

I hope he’s in as much pain as I am. The way he ended it was so cold and selfish and unlike how he was any other time with me. It was like a personality switch. I’ve never been so wrong about someone. I’m not sure how to process or recover from that part of it.

Anyone with anxious attachment tendencies? Going through a breakup and I keep thinking about how I pushed him away and then am down on myself, replaying memories in my mind. At the end of the day, I think we were a bad match from the beginning and misaligned, but so hard not to beat myself over my anxious attachment during my relationship

I don’t understand how someone can lie about loving you for 6 months. We were together for almost a year (broke up a week before our anniversary). I said I love you first and he said it back. I asked for more reassurance last month with saying I love you more often. Now all of a sudden he said he didn’t know if he loved me and that love meant marriage for him. Okay well great thanks for telling me this now, 6 months after it was initially exchanged. I don’t understand how he could do that.

It’s week 5 for me of the breakup and even though I had a full and fun weekend with friends and people I love, I woke up today so so sad because I wanted to text my ex. I just feel overall so defeated and exhausted from sadness and unmotivated at work :(

Any suggestions for how to keep my mind and body busy? My job is painfully slow and not challenging and I’ve started to re read old texts and have OD’d on Matthew Hussey videos. What are practical things I can start to help turn this next chapter? Besides job hunting! I feel like I need to throw myself into something worthwhile that I feel good about! I just don’t have inspiration or motivation right now. I feel flat.

I felt like a walking zombie during thanksgiving, barely eating and barely talking. My family is small and I told them ahead of time my relationship ended. I focused on my niece and nephews, cried when I wanted to and slept from 8pm-noon for the last 5 days. Showered once or twice. That’s the best I could do and that’s OK right now. I’m back in my apartment, just trying to take it one day at a time, and not re read his texts too much. My birthday is Thursday 🙄

Do you tell your boss you’re going through a breakup? I’m phoning it in and obviously going to be camera off for awhile.